


Asymmetrical

by PillowfortsandIcecream



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Tokyo Ghoul, Angst, Blood and Gore, Boyfriends, Death, Finished, Fluff and Angst, Gay, Ghoul Kaneki Ken, Hidekane Week, Hidekane Week 2018, Kuroneki | Black-haired Kaneki, M/M, Multi, Precious Kaneki Ken | Sasaki Haise, Sharing a Bed, Shironeki | White-haired Kaneki, Short Chapters, Suicide Attempt, Sunshine Boy Nagachika Hideyoshi, Swearing, To Be Continued, Tokyo Ghoul Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-16
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-06-11 05:31:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 23
Words: 45,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15308541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PillowfortsandIcecream/pseuds/PillowfortsandIcecream
Summary: Ken thought his new organ was causing his ghoulish needs. Failing to remove it with a kitchen knife he tried something else, accidentally getting Hide involved in the process.(AU where Ken ends up with the CCG rather and Anteiku)(Warning for suicidal themes.)





	1. Varient

**Author's Note:**

> If the pictures don't load on the last chapter, you can find them on pillowfortsandicecream Tumblr :)

The knife skittered across the floor, metal distorted into a twisted shape. Kaneki sobbed, “It didn’t work. It didn’t work.” His face was lined with ugly tears, his nose wrinkled and shoulders shuddering. The only light shone in a single beam through Kaneki’s open bathroom door. Food was strewn across the room, bread crumbs, wrappers, bottles spilling their contents made dark coloured puddles that seeped between the wooden floorboards. Even his favourite food, a hamburger steak, was splattered down under the sink. Pieces of shattered pottery plate sticking out from it like shards of glass. He shifted upwards, leaning back against the wall sobbing to much to stand. Another small rectangle of light shone out faintly from the kitchen countertop, his phone. Kaneki gazed up at it, the light doubled and shifted though the heavy droplets still sliding down his face. As if on cue the phone buzzed slightly, the screen changing colour and illuminating the apartment in blue. Hide, Ken thought, He’d texted him asking for notes from the day’s he’d missed at University. That was probably his reply. Kaneki didn’t bother to stand up, let alone think of a reply. He just rested his head back against the wall with a slight thump. What am I supposed to do? 

Slowly the phones light faded as it changed from screensaver to sleep. Ken still sat on the floor, legs outstretched and hands rested lightly in his lap. The floor was hard and cold, the snail trailed tears on Kens face had dried up. He gazed over at the contorted metal shining in the bathroom light. No point trying that again, Ken thought, I really am … different. 

Kaneki reached out, picking the knife up by the blade. As he expected, the sharp metal didn’t pierce his skin, he’d just hoped he was wrong. The silver turned to grey as he brought it out of the light. Kaneki squeezed the edge, pulling the handle so that the sharp point was drawn quickly across his palm. Nothing. Not even a scratch.

The knife clattered against the fridge as Ken threw it. Not that tossing it around would help, being able to get a new kidney was his last chance. Now there was nothing left to do. Ken stretched out his legs, standing up slowly and using the wall for support. Stepping over the assortment of scattered left-overs. He slumped heavily beside his bed, hearing his phone buzz again and again, not bothering to look over at it. 

If I can’t use a knife… Ken moved, hearing the bed-sheets crease under his fingers. Somewhere under the bed, He knelt down, rummaging thought storage boxes and messing up the neat assortment of rarely used items he kept under there. Under here somewhere, he knew he still owned it, from that time he and Hide hiked up Mt.Daimonji-yama. Not that they had needed it, the view from the mountain had been great and the climb was easy enough. Even for a bookworm. After tossing things aside he found what he was looking for, Ken turned around observing the state of his room. Messier than he’d ever seen it, even messier than when him Hide had pulled an all-nighter revising for a huge literature exam the next morning. Thoughts of Hide made him smile, but only for a moment. Preparing himself Ken scooped up his mobile, sending one last text. 

“I’m Sorry Hide.”

Kaneki looped the rope over his fingers, moving his desk chair slowly into the middle of the room. 

\---

Outside the night air had cooled and Hide pulled his jacket up around his neck and quickened his pace. Inside his pocket his phone buzzed, a text from Kaneki. Hide smiled and typed a reply, ‘No worries, you needed time to recover from the accident.’

He stomped his feet on the mat outside Kens door, noticing the lack of light thought the window. That was odd, had he fallen asleep? Knowing Ken he was probably curled up on his bed reading a book under lamp-light. Hide chuckled, shuffling his backpack and knocking on the door. 

There was no response. Hide rang the doorbell, nothing. He sidled up to the window, trying to squint though the blinds. Inside was only one small beam of light seeping out from the bathroom. Hide pulled out his phone and clicked in a few numbers, listening to the dial tone connect him to Kaneki. Though the blinds Hide could make out the tinny light of a phone, looked like it was laying on Kens bed illuminating the space at the back of the room. Book spines stretched upwards neatly lined on shelves. Something was blocking the light, a silhouette. Was Kaneki just standing in the room, Hide knocked on the window pane, “Hey! Ken! Open the door already.” 

The phones light was quickly fading, in the last few moments the silhouette was visible Hide noticed the black line. His eyes widened, his bag slumped to the floor. “KEN!” He rattled the door handle, slamming his shoulder into the door. “No. No. No. No.” The key, Ken always kept a spare key close by. Hide ripped up the doormat, scraping up the prize, it had been there so long a shape in the dust was left behind. 

Unlocking the door seemed to take far longer than usual, Hide jammed in the key twisting it so hard his nervously sweating hands slipped off. He grabbed the handle, turning it and slammed the door against the wall as he ran inside. He didn’t bother closing it, just left it to slowly creak shut as he leapt up to Ken. Hide was panicking, he felt his heartbeat throb in his ears, each breath seeming quicker and sharper than the last. His shoes slipped on the mess of food and drink scattered over the floor, KanekiKanekiKaneki, Hide couldn’t think of anything else. Lifting the chair back up from where it had been kicked over he slid it under Kens dangling feet. The rope creaked. No you don’t, Don’t you dare. Kens feet stood flat on the chair and he leaned forward letting out a small wheezing breath.

“Hold on Ken, I’m going to get something to cut you down.” Hide could only reach up to Kens waist so he held him steady and glanced feverishly around the room. “Hold on.” Hide leapt over to a knife he spotted glinting below the fridge. He picked it up as quickly as he could, not even registering its strange misshapen blade. Ken spluttered under the taught ropes knot. 

“Kaneki Don’t you dare.” Hide skidded back and jumped up onto the chair, lifting Kens limp form to loosen the rope from his neck. The knifes edge sawed across the fibres, Hide couldn’t cut it without the knot pulling harder against Kaneki. Every time he tried he heard a splutter in retort. Taking a risk Hide pushed the knife into the back of Kens neck, sliding the sharp hooked edge under and against the rope. Finally, he felt it come loose and the two of them fell onto the floor with a thud.

“Ow.” Hide mumbled, “Lucky you’re not all that heavy Kaneki…Kaneki?” Hide rolled Ken off him and onto his back pulling the last of the frayed rope away from his throat. “Talk to me.” Hide placed an ear to Kens chest. Pushing down to try and hear any sign of a heartbeat. “Ken.” Hide lifted his friends neck, trying to stop his own juddering breaths. He locked his hands and thumped down on Ken’s chest, trying to remember everything from a first aid class he’d had years ago. The door clicked shut, it had been less than a minute since he entered Ken’s small home. 

“Come on.” Hide continued to perform CPR, blowing into Kens mouth to try and re-start his breathing. “Who’s going to nag me about homework?” Another breath, “Who’s going to tell me about all the books I need to read?” Another breath, “Who’s going to sit in class with me? I’ll get lonely ya’know.” One more breath, “Kaneki. I need you.” He gave an extra hard push down onto Kens chest. 

Ken spluttered, coughing up a bubbling blob of mucus. “Kaneki, that’s, that’s disgusting,” Hide let out a relived laugh and lent down, scooping his arms around Ken’s back and lifting him up into a tight hug. Sobbing, Hide held the back of Kens head, feeling the dark hair between his fingers. “Ken I… I… I can’t loose you.”

"Hide?"


	2. Twofold

Kaneki lay on his bed, tucked under the covers, warm and safe. Hide was cleaning up the last few crumbs from the kitchen floor. He examined the warped knife carefully, wondering how it could possibly have become so twisted. The room looked normal again, books all in their places, the last of the food scraps in the bin. Kens fridge was empty and his cupboards bare, He hadn’t even eaten the hamburger Hide had bought for him. Well, it had been cooked but by the looks of it Ken had only taken one bite.

Hide considered going out to get some food, but felt reluctant to leave Kaneki alone. He sat down on the bed, lifting a few strands of hair away from Kens forehead. Hide moved the covers to check on his friend’s neck. There was no sign of a mark, not even a bruise. Strange, he could have sworn there had been a mark earlier, a deep purple indent that looped around Ken’s delicate neck. 

“Kaneki, why didn’t you call me?” Leaning down Hide checked for the faint signs of breath, sure enough Kaneki’s chest slowly rose and fell. He was going to be okay. “Why did you even do this, I mean, I know you’ve been struggling but, we’re best friends. I didn’t even…You could have said something. Your text, oh I’m such an idiot.” Hide wiped his eyes, one hand on Kens shoulder. “I’d better get you something to drink.” Hide stood up, he tried to take a step forward but found his hand pulled back. Ken held it in his own. He’d woken up.

“Hide.”

“That’s me you Idiot.” Hide sat back down, not bothering to keep the tears out his eyes. Kaneki gave a faint smile, which was quickly replaced by an expression of fear and worry. Hide noticed this change and placed his other hand on Kens cheek. “What’s wrong?”

“Hide. I… I’m… Hide please.” Ken sobbed, closing his eyes tight and rolling over away from Hide. Pulling away from him and covering his face. 

“ ’Neki, everything’s going to get better, we can work though this. Find someone for you to talk to, a professional and slowly you can get though this. I know you can.” Hide slipped off his shoes and tossed them aside, he crawled under the covers and leaned up against Ken’s warm back, wrapping his arms over Kens chest and burying his head into the back of Kens neck. Hide breathed in that familiar smell as Kens sniffles caused small intermittent jerks rattle their shoulders. 

“No, I can’t. I can’t do it,” Kaneki trembled, “I can’t.” He curled up further until he was lying in the corner of the bed in a foetal position. 

“I’ll help you, start to finish I’ll be here.” Hide whispered, giving Ken a squeeze. 

“You don’t understand.” 

“Then talk to me.”

“Hide I…” Kaneki rolled back until he was facing Hide, who placed his hands gently of ether idea of Kens face. “Hide I’m…I…” Kaneki opened his eyes. One was a normal silvery grey. The other black with a blooming red iris like a spot of blood. Dark lines spread out from this eye, stretching back like fresh scars. 

“Ken?”

“Hide, I’m a monster.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it :)  
> I will be writing more. I have the story in mind, just not a lot of time to write it all down.  
> Hideken is the sunshine I need in life.
> 
> Please let me know what you think :)


	3. Once Bitten, Twice Shy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bit of fluff, some sad stuff. Some eating, nomnomnom.  
> A longer chapter for you today, I hope you like it.
> 
> (warnings apply, death, suicide themes, blood.)

“A ghoul?” Hide blinked, hoping to wake up back at home, hoping this was some kind of bad dream. The tightening grip on his wrists proved otherwise. “Ken?” He asked, trying to pull his arms away, Kaneki held them steady with a strength far stronger than he had ever showed before. That black and red eye shone out from under Kens fringe, glinting slightly and shuddering from side to side. A line of drool was slowly seeping from Kens mouth, dampening the pillow. He leaned in closer, his mouth opening to reveal a gaping hungry hole of white teeth. Hide couldn’t move, he couldn’t process this. Despite his quick reactions to save his friend earlier this was just too much. 

Ken? A ghoul? There’s just no way.

Teeth scraped across Hide's neck, he could hear Kaneki take in a deep breath of his sent, feel how this smell made him drool even more. Using his teeth, Kaneki pulled back Hides shirt, revealing the tight meat of his shoulder. Hide didn’t move, he was frozen, stuck by surprise and fear. Kaneki’s red eye blinked, flashing for a second from silver to blood. Trying to relax Hide lifted his sholder up slightly, turning his head away and preparing himself for pain. 

Don’t scream. If I scream someone will hear, and then Kaneki will be taken away and killed. Whatever happens I mustn’t scream.

“Go on.” Hide whispered into Kens ear, trying to keep the quiver out of his voice. “Just take it, we’re going to get though this.” He could feel teeth scrape slowly over his skin, warm breath causing goose-bumps to flood his arms. The grip on Hides wrists loosed a little, enough for him to slip his hands out and slide them up and around Kaneki’s back. Holding his head close so that those teeth were pressed into him. Their chests were up against one another, legs intertwined and bed sheets wrapping them ever closer.

Ken scraped his teeth downwards until his jaw was closed, he didn’t bite, just pressed his lips into Hide kissing his shoulder. His tears seeped down Hide’s collarbone. Gently stroking Kens back Hide asked softly, “why didn’t you ever tell me?” 

Though his sniffles Kaneki replied, “I didn’t know, I mean, this is new.” There was a pause but Hide knew better than to interrupt. Kaneki was just finding the right words, sure enough, he began to explain. “Hide, after the accident, when Rize died. She was a ghoul, she tried to… tried to eat me. Then, in the hospital, Hide I’ve got her organs. So I... I’m... I can’t eat, nothing tastes right and I just want, I just want meat.”

Hide didn’t ask which ‘meat’ Ken was craving, he knew. Everyone knew. 

“Hide. Please.” Ken pushed him away so that they could look one another in the eyes. “Please just kill me.”

“What are you saying?” Hides question hung in the air for a moment, he knew Kaneki was serious, he could see the determination in the way those grey eyes stuck fast to his own. Unwavering and resolute. “I can’t do that Ken.” Hide felt Kaneki slump, his shoulders fall and head sink into the pillow. There were still food stains on his jumper, Hide picked a few of the crumbs away. “Talk to me ‘neki” Hide spoke softly, brushing Ken’s hair to one side. 

“Everything tastes awful, rotten. I tried everything. I tried to get rid of it, Rize, I tried to get rid of her from inside me.” Kaneki sniffed into his palms, mumbling out words with his eyes closed. “The knife, it was just like Dr Ogura said on TV, I couldn’t cut though the skin.” 

“So you…”

“I don’t want to be a ghoul Hide.” Kaneki buried his head further under the blankets, leaning into Hides chest. 

“I’m here Ken, I’m right here.” Hide enveloped him in his arms, trying his best to stay brave. “Take a shower, you’ve got crumbs in your hair, I’ll put your clothes in the wash and we can find a way though this.” 

Kaneki sniffed and nodded under the covers, the two of them slid slowly off the bed and Hide turned on the hot water, letting the shower steam up as Ken stood balancing nervously on the balls of his feet. Beckoning, Hide lead him into the bathroom and closed the door. He waited for a few moments, listening to Kens clothes ruffle before the door was opened a crack and his jumper and trousers were handed though. “I’ll put some clean ones out side the door.” Hide nodded, Ken just sniffed and murmured something that might have been a thank you in response. 

The shower lasted longer than usual, Hide put Kens old clothes in the washing machine, as well as some from the dirty washing basket and switched it on. He found some older clothes that could be used a Pyjamas and got changed, placing another set outside the bathroom door. He needs to eat something Hide thought, the accident was a while ago now, he must be hungry. Something he can eat… someone.” Hide knew if Ken was found by the CCG he’d be killed. Executed just because he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. From the bathroom door Hide noticed the water had stopped running, “Ken?” He called out. No response. He knocked, “Ken I’ve got some Pyjamas for you, its late, we can stay here tomorrow.” 

From inside Hide heard a slight whimper, He knocked again “Ken?” The door clicked, opening a fraction of an inch. Hide handed over the clothes and tried to smile, dark circles under Kens eyes proved he’d been crying. One of his pupils was still black and red.

Later that evening the two of them sat on the bed, watching some old sappy movie that was playing on the TV. Ken didn’t laugh or even smile at any of the jokes, he just lay in a comatose-like state leaning up against Hide’s chest. Until the credits rolled across screen, Hide shuffled down and pulled Kaneki closer.

“Hide?” 

“What’s up ‘neki?” 

“Can you…” He took Hides hands, lifting them to his neck “Please.”

“Kaneki I can’t, I won’t kill you. You’re my best friend.” Hide felt his hands being pushed up against Kens soft neck. 

“Hide, I’m hungry. So please.” His hands tightened their grip, he lifted his chin and closed his miss-matched eyes. 

“Ken, we’ll think of something, in the morning. Please.” Kaneki let Hide’s hands go, leaning down onto his chest. The two fell asleep that way, leaving tomorrows problems for later.

They slept in well past noon, ignoring alarm clocks and the sunlight that began to seep in under the blinds. Eventually, Hide wriggled out from under Ken and got himself a glass of water. He considered calling the CCG, explaining everything and asking that Ken be allowed to live. The chances of that happening were little to none. Ghouls had always been portrayed as monsters. He gazed back at Ken, who’s chest slowly rose and fell under the covers. Why him, if anyone had to become a ghoul then surly Kaneki was a poor choice. Hide rinsed out his glass, re-filling it with water for Ken. He slid open a draw and considered the items inside, knifes and forks lined up and all perfectly clean. Picking out one of the sharper knifes, he had an idea.

Where did Ken keep his first aid kit, in the bathroom right? Sure enough He found it and pulled out a few plasters. Ken was still sound asleep. Hide bit his lip, unwrapped a plaster and held his finger out above the glass. The knife stung and a few drops of blood pitter-pattered into the water, congealing into small red beads. Using a tea spoon Hide stirred the mixture until it was a light reddish colour. 

Gently shaking Kens shoulder Hide whispered for him to wake up, “Hey, drink this.” 

“Hide?” Kens eyes blinked away sleep and he sat up slowly, one eye still a shining with a red hue. He took the glass as Hide pressed it into his hands. 

“Its water, please try, for me.” Hide smiled and nodded, pushing the glass closer. Ken lifted it and took a sip. Then another, then he held both hands around the cup and downed the rest in one go. Hide let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding. 

“Hide.” Realisation dawned on Kens face, “That, that didn’t taste like water.” He noticed the slight red stain glinting at the bottom of the glass. “Hide, what did you do?” Kens red eye seeped away.

“Sorry, I just, just a little.” Hide couldn’t help but smile, this wouldn’t fix anything but at least he’d found a temporary solution to Kens new diet. Just a little blood, just a few drops. How long would it last, he'd need something more substantial sooner or later.

They stayed inside that day, Ken reading and Hide doing some work for his course on Kens laptop. Sure enough, after only an hour Kens abnormal eye soaked black and red. Kaneki rubbed it, putting his book down a heading to the bathroom mirror. “Don’t,” Hide reached out and held his hand, “You don’t have to look at it.” They both new staying inside and avoiding the problem wouldn’t work forever. “I’ll get you another glass.”

“Hide…”

“Don’t worry, its just a few drops.” Hide rose and picked off the plaster from his finger, behind him Ken shuffled closer. The cut had scabbed over, Hide didn’t bother with the knife, he just picked at the scab like a child. A drop welled up, a single red crescent blooming on his finger. “Ken, hand me the glass.” 

Kaneki had frozen, his red eye wide and hands quivering slightly. He was fixated on the bloody finger, even when Hide moved Kens eyes followed him around the room. 

“Kaneki, calm down, breathe okay.” On second thought, maybe showing blood to a hungry ghoul was a bad idea.

“Hide… Hide I want, to…to,” Kaneki wrapped his hands around his stomach and crouched into a ball on the floor. His tone deepened and cracked, sounding like a distorted version of the voice Hide knew. “I want to devour…” Ken snapped back, tumbling over and pushing himself into a corner of the room. He threw his arms over his knees and hid his face. Hide stepped over carefully, kneeling down in front of his friend.

“You’re still you Ken. You’re still my best friend.” Hide reached out to touch him, making a grave mistake. Before he could react, Ken had grabbed his arm in a vice-like grip, Hide yelped, feeling as if his bones may snap under Kens hold. “Kaneki!” He tried but it was too late.

Kaneki’s mouth was around Hides hand, holding three fingers between his teeth, Hides thumb up against his cheek. A wet tongue rippled over the cut, opening it further and sucking out the juices inside. Hide was about the pull away, but then he noticed Kens shaking shoulders, felt the cold tears dripping down his face. He hadn’t bitten down, he could have, his new strength meant he could have snapped Hide’s finger bones like carrot sticks. Crunched up the pieces like bits of cereal and turned Hides hand into a mess of stripped meat and oozing veins. But he didn’t. Ken just sucked at the fingers in his mouth, opening up the cut with his sharper than possible tongue. Hide winced, trying to slow his furiously beating heart, fighting back against the flight or fight response that comes when ones hand is at risk of being bitten off. 

Kens teeth scraped against the wound, “Hey ‘neki, c-careful okay?” Hide tried not to stammer. 

Kaneki wasn’t listening, not to Hide anyway. All he could hear was the voice of Rize coldly laughing and encouraging him to make a mess of entrails from Hide until every part of his home was coated in red. His teeth bit down just slightly, Hide winced. Blood blossomed into Kens mouth, driving his senses insane. The taste was warming, fulfilling and finally seemed to satisfy that empty void that had become Kens chest. 

“Ow, Ken that…” Hides wriggling only made Kaneki bite down harder. “Kaneki, that’s, stop Ow AH!” 

Kaneki’s teeth hit something solid and raked against it. He gasped, swallowed and released Hide. Who automatically skidded back and held his hand close to his chest. 

“Hide. I, I’m Sorry… I…” Ken murmured, his lips red and teeth glazed over with blood. Hide was holding back a scream, shuddering and sweating. Holding his fingers tightly in his hand, tears squeezed out from his eyes and his teeth clenched in pain. 

Kaneki jumped up, took a few steps to the kitchen and grabbed the first aid kid from where Hide had left it. Handing it over, Kaneki tried not to look at the droplets of dark crimson that fell from Hides fist, making perfect circles on to the floor like drops of red sweet syrup. Hide opened the kit with this free hand, struggling to unscrew the disinfectant, Kaneki opened it for him and they wrapped Hides hand in layers of gauze and bandage. The whole time Kaneki murmured ‘sorrysorrysorry’ under his breath, like a mantra just repeating it over and over until it had stopped sounding like a word and began to seem like a steam of consciousness. 

“Sit down,” Hide asked and Kaneki curled back into his corner. Slowing his words down until they were barely audible. “I’m going to need stiches,” Hide nodded, “Please Ken, stay here, I’ll be back later and then we will find something to help you.” 

“What are you going to tell them?” Ken shuffled, speaking into his knees.

“Anything but the truth. Keep your phone on, I’ll call you going there and getting back.” Hide gave Kens hair and affectionate stroke. “I’m here for you. I'll always be here for you.”

Kaneki nodded, keeping his distance from Hide. "Thank you, Hide."


	4. Relapse

Waiting impatiently Hide sat in a hard plastic chair in the waiting room, his finger ached and he couldn’t get Kaneki from his mind. He’d taken the rope and thrown it in the trash outside of Kens apartment, perhaps he should have insisted Kaneki come with him. Then again, that ghoul eye was a little too obvious to miss. Even with an eye patch Ken might hurt someone. No, Hide shook his head, Ken wouldn’t hurt anyone, he thought. Although the stinging in his fingers made his thoughts hard to truly believe. 

Hide told the doctors his finger had gotten badly scraped falling off his bike, they didn’t ask anything more that that. Just gave him a few suspicious glances. The disinfectant stung and Hide was told he would have to wait a while for the local anaesthetic to numb his hand. The hospital had a strict no mobile phones policy so all Hide could to was wait on the hospital bed as his had slowly numbed. Finally, after a tense hour a nurse came and began to explain to him how the anaesthetic would work during the stitching procedure. Hide rudely interrupted her, “I’m a Pharmacy student I know how it works. Please can I just get this over with.” She huffed and Hide felt a little guilty. 

After having his hand stitched and wrapped Hides patience was coming to its end. He was being lectured on how to take care of his fingers, how often to change the bandage and to come back if his fingers turned blue, or green or any colour that wasn’t his normal tone. “Right, got it.” He nodded, hoping this was the end. 

“And if it leaks puss…” The nurse was saying, Hide waved his uninjured hand and headed for the door.

“Thanks Bye!” He waved, gave a short polite bow and left before the nurse had turned around from her overly detailed poster about infections. Hide was scolded for running in the corridor by a stern faced guard. So he briskly walked, practically skipping, out of the hospitals automatic doors. 

As soon as he was outside he dialled Kaneki’s number, tapping his foot the tense few seconds before the phone was picked up. “Hey Ken, I’m on my way back.”

“Hide.” The response was fuzzy and quiet. 

“Are you safe?” Hide asked, quickening his pace back to Kens flat. 

“Yeah, I just… I don’t want to hurt you anymore Hide.” 

“I’m okay, it was only a few stitches.” 

“No, I wanted too, I wanted more.” Kens voice was juddering now, uncertain and afraid. 

“But you didn’t, you stopped.” Hide was jogging, trying to get back as quickly as he could whilst still holding the phone steady. 

“Hide, I’m going away. Thanks for always being there for me.” 

“Kaneki No! I L…” But the phones beeping cut him off, Kaneki had hung up. Hide tried redialling but the line was busy. He broke into a run, ignoring the throb of pain he felt echo in his hand with each step. The phone, Kaneki hadn’t ignored it, the line had been busy. Who was he calling? Not his aunt, surely not. A line of sirens blared out a few streets away. Emanating from a tall building everyone knew the name of. “No, no way.” 

He’d stayed away too long, he should have just stapled his finger up and stayed with Ken. This wasn’t how he wanted things to go. Ken hadn’t even given him a chance to help, he could have stayed forever, he’d do anything. They would find a way, they could this. Ken and Hide Vs the world. Hides heavy footfalls shook the thoughts from his mind and brought reality back into view. The CCG finding Ken was a matter of time, not luck. Still, if he arrived in time Ken might have a chance. 

Hide sped up running like he was being chased by a hungry lion, although in this place a hungry ghoul was more likely. Skidding a sliding round corners, grazing his palms on sharp turns and kicking up small stones with every step. He felt the fresh stitches burst as he vaulted a low wall, his breath heavy and uneven. He had to get there first. Up the stairs, taking them two at a time, Hide leapt around and sprinted down the row of identical doors. He almost fell stopping at Kaneki’s but grasped the handle and wrenched the door open, shoes squeaking as he tried to slow down. 

Kaneki was there, sitting by the bed, gazing down into his lap. He held is favourite book gently in his hands. He was waiting. Just waiting there for the CCG to arrive. 

“Kaneki.” Hide slid over towards him, panted and sweaty. He reached forward, holding Ken close like he’d never let go, wrapping his arms around him as if they could melt together and take away every pain.

“Hide? You need to leave.” Ken murmured, but made no effort to push him away. “You’ll be arrested for helping me…” He was monotone and sounded numb.

“No. I won’t.” Hide heard the sirens draw closer, the sound of heavy boots marching up the stairs. The door was unlocked, any moment now. Any second, they’d burst in and kill the one person who Hide cared for. But he had time, they had to check that Ken was a ghoul first, in case of prank calls. His eye was the tell-tale sign they needed. Hide had to think of something and quick.

An idea was just beginning to form when everything began to happened at once; shadows glazed past the window, the door handle turned, Kaneki pounced, and Hide gasped. Knocked back so that his head hit the floor with a smack the world around him trembled and spun. “Ken...” He murmured before feeling himself being lifted of the floor and tossed to one side like a ragdoll. 

Ken let one last small smile slip though before the bathroom door closed. Keeping Hide out of sight and teetering on the edge of subconscious. His aching head hit the sink and he blacked out, skull pounding and light flickering before his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I tried to edit this one a little to fix some of the mistakes. There might still be a few but I hope you like it anyway. I might not be able to update as frequently as I have been anymore but I will try my best!


	5. Conform for Comfort

Hide woke up with no idea how much time had passed. His senses seemed to return one by one. He felt the cold bathroom floor, heard the sound of his jacket ruffle as he sat up, smelled soap and Kaneki. Kaneki. Hide’s eyes snapped open, his head still spinning. Kaneki. He tumbled out though the bathroom door, the room was empty. Nothing had changed. "Kaneki where are you?" He thought aloud, there was no blood, only the faint drops from Hides finger still lingered on the floor where he had been bitten. 

Kaneki, no. He dashed forward, opening the front door and striding out into the cold night air. Nothing. No Kaneki, No CCG. Nothing. He tried calling, but of course that didn’t work. Kaneki’s number had been disconnected. 

The CCG, if they didn’t kill him here then maybe, just maybe he was still alive. He’d given himself up after all, if he wasn’t fighting back would they really just execute him? Hide shook his head, don’t think like that. 

He gathered up a few things, shoving them roughly into his backpack and left. The CCG wasn’t to far, Hide dialled their number.

“Hello, CCG ghoul sightings line please state your emergency.”

“My friend, Kaneki Ken, please don’t kill him.” Hide panted, sprinting down the roads, each streetlight flashing past as he ran.

“Could you state your emergency please.” 

“A one-eyed ghoul. You just found a one-eyed ghoul. He handed himself over to you.” Hide clenched his teeth, preparing for the worst. 

The line fuzzed with static, “I’m connecting you to a higher up, please wait a moment.” Hide slowed to cross a road, holding the phone close so as to drown out the sound of passing cars. The light flashed green and he jogged across the road. “You have information about Owl?”

“What? No. Kaneki, he was in an accident and had an organ transplant, now he’s got a ghoul eye. He is human, please.” There was some muttering on the line, whispers of “Not Owl?” and “That boy from few hours ago?” Finally, the voice said “Come in the the CCG, we would like to ask you some questions.” 

“I’m on my way. Please, don’t hurt Kaneki. He’s my friend.” The phone clicked and Hide starting making his way towards that shining tower that lit up the centre of the city with rays of cold light emanating from its many windows. He bit his lip and held his hands in fists to stop them shaking. Kaneki was going to be okay, He had to be okay.

 

\---

 

The metal door slid shut as Kaneki shivered. He was being escorted down an echoing corridor by four armoured guards, their white CCG uniforms shiny and new. Each footstep clicked down the pathway until they reached another door. This one slid open after one of the guards swiped a white card against a panel. Kaneki was pushed roughly into a larger room. He rubbed his wrists from where the restraints had stung. This square cell had a small bunk and blanket, a desk and sink, plus a toilet and open shower hidden behind a low wall. One side of the room was a long window. On the outside another room, but this one smaller, with some chairs and a table opposite where Kaneki’s desk was. He gazed around, his eye twitched and his glass reflection looked back. Messy hair and shoulders tense. He pulled his gaze away, not wanting to see at that alien red eye. Ken sat down on the small bed and curled up, wishing he had a book with him to escape into. 

After maybe half an hour, there was no clock in the cell, Ken opened his eyes. Hearing a knock resonate from the window. Behind the glass were two tall gentlemen, one stern faced with broad shoulders the other hunched, squinting and pulling a cold, curious smile. Kaneki rubbed his eyes and sat up. 

“Kaneki Ken-san.” The taller of the two rapped his knuckles on the glass, gesturing to the chair. Ken moved over and sat down cauciously, the men opposite him did the same. “Kaneki-san, do you know where you are?”

Ken shook his head, staring down at the desk. He let out a small noise, trying to speak but his nerves holding him back. 

“I’m Mado-san and this is my colleague, Amon-San.” The older man spoke, tipping his head to one side and staring as if Kaneki was an exhibit in a museum. “Tell me, why would a ghoul, a flesh-eating monster, turn themselves in?” 

“I’m not a ghoul,” Kaneki mumbled. “I was in hospital, when I woke up this," he pointed to his red eye, “this was, this thing…”

“Your eye?” Amon asked. 

Kaneki just nodded back. Mado chuckled quietly, “But why turn yourself in? Why not go out and tear apart some helpless humans?”

“I…I don’t want to hurt anyone. I can’t, please. I rang the CCG because I don’t want to hurt people.” Kaneki stammered, his hands gripping his knees. 

“Some members of the CCG say you could help us kill ghouls.” Amon stated flatly, inspecting Kaneki's reaction and trying to fathom why this boy really had surrendered.

“Amon-san…” Mado leaned forward, not taking his eyes of Kaneki, who avoided them as best he could.

Amon continued, “Ghouls possess a certain level of strength and skills that would outmatch any human. Although I disagree with my superiors about you, I will still ask.” Amon placed his hands on the desk, standing to look down at the quivering boy. “Kaneki-san, would you help the CCG eradicate ghouls?” Ken was so surprised he didn’t manage to form a response, he just stammered and froze up. 

Amon turned and commanded loudly, “Open the door.” Behind him there was a faint ‘beep’ and someone else entered the room. 

“Hide!” Ken stood up, placing his palms on the glass. Hide ran forward and held up his hands, palms matching Kens, only the glass between them. Behind Hide, a tall figure stepped calmly inside. 

“Arima-san” Amon greeted him with a formal nod. The man in his long white coat nodded back, letting though a small secretive smile. Amon patted Mado’s sholder and the two got up to leave Mado leaving one passing comment behind, “Little ghoul sure is a strange creature.” 

Kaneki trembled, there was no doubt in his mind that Mado-san would have ripped him apart and examined the pieces if not for orders from his superior. 

“Kaneki… Kaneki you…” Hide threw around a few sentences in his mind, unsure of what to ask first. 

Arima stepped to wards the window, a large white case held casually in his hand. He observed the two, his eyes drifting from Hides expression across their almost touching palms until he was looking directly into Kens eyes. “You can stay here. We can provide food, Hideyoshi-kun can visit. After a time, we may test you with the hope that eventually you join the CCG. Although I am aware many of our officers will never trust you.” He spoke calmly, like he knew everything that was about to happen and stood forward, unafraid. 

“Please.” Hide smiled, “Ken, stay alive.” He rummaged though his bag, “I brought you a book, security said it could be given to you. He looked at Arima, who held a hand out for the volume. Hide cautiously placed it in his open palm. Arima's card swiped over a small box, hidden in the corner, which beeped. A door on Hides side popped open. Arima slid the book inside and closed the door. On Kaneki’s side the box beeped again and opened so that he could retrieve his book.

“The black goats egg. Thanks Hide.” Ken smiled, running a finger down the spine. He took a deep breath, meeting Arima’s eyes, “I accept your offer, thank you.” 

Hide relaxed, he’d been so afraid Ken was going to be killed that every part of him was pulled tight by nerves. Arima nodded, “You will be trained, as well as lectured in the CCG’s methods and polices. You will have to wait quite sometime time before leaving this room.” 

Ken nodded, attempting to be brave. “Sir, I wondered, you mentioned food I don’t want to eat people so, so is there anything else?” Kaneki bit his lip and Hide looked back over at Arima. 

“Do you really want to hear the answer to that question?” Arima asked, letting the resounding silence act as a response. “We will ensure you are only given food that has died naturally or though accidental means. Although I have my doubts this brings you any comfort.” 

Arima stepped back, continuing to observe the two boys as they spoke to heal recent wounds. “Ken, are you feeling alright? Did anyone hurt you?” Kaneki shook his head. Hide leaned closer to the glass, “why didn’t you tell me?”

“I’m sorry, I thought they’d just… being this, its not something I could ever have prepared for. I never want to hurt you again.”

“I know, It’s not something anyone could prepare for.” Hide let his shoulders relax, Ken was safe. Thats all that mattered. "Besides, I'm fine." Hide waved his hand, the bandages were roughed up and a little red but otherwise seemed okay.

“Thank you for the book Hide, its my favourite.” 

“I know Ken, I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ohhhh more characters. This is fun :)  
> Amon and Arima's lines are hard to write :/ I'll keep working on it, I read the manga to get more of an idea about how they phrase sentences and such.  
> Anyway, I hope your week is filled with Hidekane :)


	6. Out of Tune

Kaneki met various members of the CCG over the next few weeks, some curious, some angry and others just came to ask thought provoking questions. “Who was the ghoul in the accident?”, “What was the doctors name?”, “Do you know anything about organized ghoul groups?” Kaneki didn’t feel very helpful when questioned, he could only give answers a few words long and felt lonely despite his many fascinated guests. Hide came down a few times a week, always escorted and watched by an investigator, usually Amon. Who let slip once that there was another ghoul here he occasionally visited.

“This place is a ghoul prison,” Hide chatted, “It’s a secret, I had to sign a form saying I could be prosecuted if I told anyone.” 

“Is it okay for me to know that?” Ken worried.

“Anything they tell me they assume you’ll end up knowing too.” He shrugged, unafraid of the idea of being trapped in a building filled with hungry ghouls. “Hey, Ken.” 

“What?” 

“I’m going to join the CCG, when I finish university.” Hide nodded determinedly.

“No, Hide you cant please its dangerous.” Ken protested but Hide just waved his comments aside. “I’m doing this Ken, besides who’s going to watch your back?”

Kaneki knew the expression on Hide’s face well, he had made up his mind and there was no stopping him now. Besides, even though the thought made him feel guilty he was glad to have Hide close by. “You shouldn’t do this.” Ken tried weakly, knowing full well its was futile. “You’ve got your whole life ahead of you.”

“Yeah, but this path seems far more interesting. There is no way I’m letting you go down it alone.” Hide pulled his arms up and stretched, grinning happily. “Ken, I know your life has absolutely done a U-turn into major shit-show territory now.”

“Thanks.” Kaneki sighed sarcastically.

“Na, I mean, I’m here for you. I’m following your tune.”

“What does that even mean?” Ken let out a small laugh, the first one in weeks.

Amon-san stood quietly behind them, his white case within reach where it stood on the floor next to him. He checked his watch, fiddling his fingers over a cross at his neck. “You’ve got five minutes Hideyoshi-kun, then Kaneki will be having his first training session.” 

“Can’t I be here for that?” Hide begged.

“No.”

“Its okay Hide, I’ll tell you about it next time. What’s happening at University anyway?” Kaneki tried to change the subject, he was more nervous than anyone for this training session. 

Hides face fell, “I’m not allowed to talk about you, that’s the price for being able visit. Everyone at University, they think you’re dead.” He tapped the desk, “This way, the investigators told me, no one will look for you.” 

“No one would anyway.” Kaneki shrugged, muttering. 

“I would and I’d never stop.” Hide smiled, “All your books are at mine, I’ll bring you a new one every time I visit, I know how fast you get though them.” 

“Speaking off,” Kaneki was about to ask but Hide got there first. 

“The new Sen Takatsuki book, already pre-ordered. I’ll bring it as soon as it arrives.” 

“Thanks, hey! You remembered their name!” Ken smiled.

Hide gazed at him, seeing the reaction he was hoping for and grinning, “and that’s why.” He said, wishing more than anything he could reach through the glass and hold Ken’s small body close.

“Time to go.” Amon stepped forward, pulling out his security card. 

“See you next time Ken, be careful okay?” 

“Bye Hide,” Ken waved, pretending not to be nervous and not doing a very good job of it. He watched the door slide shut, just staring at it for a while after, hoping Hide would come back in. How long had it been since they’d actually touched? If he did well today, maybe, just maybe he’d be allowed.

The door behind him slid open and Kaneki’s train of thought snapped. He turned, Arima had entered the room. On the other side of the glass a group of Investigators bustled in to watch. Kaneki tensed up at the sight of so many eyes watching him. Arima had his white case with him, he was the first person to enter though that door since Kaneki was locked in here. He hadn’t yet been given any food, but didn’t complain about it even though his stomach sent sharp pains across his skin at night. 

Arima took a step forward, eyeing Ken carefully. “From our questions, you stated that you didn’t know what a kagune is.” 

Ken shook his head, “No, I don’t.” 

“A kagune is a ghoul’s weapon, which can be unsheathed from their body at will.” Arima didn’t move. “The kagune is weaker if the ghoul has not fed recently, which is why we have yet to give you any nourishment.” Kaneki nodded, attempting to process this new information. Arima placed his case on the floor, standing in a strong and balanced fighting pose. “We will first teach you some basic combat, then under supervision, you may attempt to use your kagune.” 

“O-kay.” Kaneki nodded, trying not the think about what a kagune might be and how exactly it would ‘unsheathe’ itself from him, like a sword or something? No way, that kind of stuff only happened an anime, right? Before he could finish the thought, a fist plunged itself into his diaphragm, he spluttered and kneeled over.

“Distractions will cost you.” Arima jumped back to his spot. Kaneki coughed, pulling himself up and mimicking Arimas stance. The began to shift back and forth, “Good, a little more weight on your front foot, fists up, eyes on me.” After a while of just watching Arima spoke again, “Who showed you this, its clear you’re not a fighter.”

“A book.” Kaneki responded, trying to remember all the steps he’d seen in a novel a few years ago. The images came surprisingly easily now that they were finally useful.  
The investigators watched quietly, making notes and not caring how hard Kaneki was hit. Arima seemed indifferent to his bruises, continuing to dart back and forth he commented on Kens feet movements or hand placement. Around two hours later Arima dropped his guard, he hadn’t even broken into a sweat. Kaneki on the other hand was panting and wiping beats of sweat onto the floor. 

“I’d rather be in a practice hall. Next time we will have you escorted to an empty cell.” He gazed though the window, nodding at the other investigators, who began to depart. Once they had all left he said a few words to Kaneki, “I’ll have some books sent over, a few about ghouls too.” Kaneki held his arm, which felt numb from its recent beating. He gave Arima a small bow in thanks. Anima left the room using his card, letting slip a small look of sadness, “Some food will be here later too.”

Ken gulped, unable to keep his battered abdomen from letting out a telling gurgle. 

Of course. Food.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Working on more chapters for you :)  
> Thanks for reading


	7. The Beaten Path Untouched

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Juuzo sits on the table. Rize is still haunting Ken who is confused and adorable. Also, Hide unwillingly gets his ear pierced. 
> 
> Chapter Summarys are weird.

The plate came on a metal tray accompanied by a spoon, no knife. Not that it mattered. An hour or so had passed and Kens bruises had already faded into a mottled yellow. His meal was a dark red, looking a little like bended kidney beans and smelling strangely rich. He moved it from the box to the desk and sat down. The guard showed no emotion and left without a word, “Thank you.” Kaneki called out after him but got no response. 

He was left alone, with the plate. 

Ken stared at it, wishing his mouth would stop watering. He traced the edge of the spoon. Cameras had been installed everywhere except the small toilet and shower area, they would know if he ate it and they would know if he didn’t. Ken scooped a small amount up to his mouth. He gave it a slight sniff and accidently let some dribble slop over and down his chin. Ken dropped the spoon with a clatter, ignoring the splatter in left over the floor. He ran over to the toilet and threw up his empty stomach. Chunks of orange and watery acid stung the inside of his mouth. He dropped down sideways and hugged his knees again. People, there were people on that plate. All Kaneki wanted to do was gulp it down and lick up the remaining smudges until there was nothing left. His red eye had remained ever since he was locked in here. The last thing he’d tasted was Hides blood.

Hide, He wanted me to stay alive, Ken thought. If I don’t eat I feel like I’ll go crazy, if that happens I’ll probably be killed. Ken stumbled back and sat down. His reflection twisted and morphed until a recognizable face shone back.

“Eat up Ka-ne-ki.” She pronounced each syllable separately, letting them roll off her tongue as if she could taste the name. 

“Rize?” 

The false reflection smiled sweetly then vanished to be replaced with Kaneki’s worried expression. He went back to staring into the plate.

“Eeenjoy your food!” Said a chipper voice, who’s owner was sitting cross-legged on the desk opposite, Ken jumped at the sound. “Ah-ha, what a skittish ghoul!” A kid? They had to be the same age as Kaneki but what were they doing here? “You know what’s funny?” They said, pressing their nose up against the glass. “I grew up around ghouls and I’m human, you grew up around people and now you’re stuck with ghouls!” The strange inspector grinned, showing a line of white teeth and misting up the glass with their breath.

“Juuzo, I wondered where you ran off to.” Kaneki stepped away from the desk, this new stranger was tall and had very short cropped hair, his deep voice was intimidating but not all that unkind. 

“Sorrrryyyyy.” Juuzo pulled at the stitches criss-crossing over their lip. “Eat up, I want to see how strong you are.” 

“Juuzo. We have places to be.” 

“Yeahhh.” The two left, Juuzo giving a wave like a child would to an animal at the zoo. Kaneki brought his mind back to Hide, trying to ignore his recent strange guests. It wasn’t long before Rize reappeared.

“Kaneki.” She whispered. Kaneki picked up the spoon and laid it down back on the table. Going back to bed and covering his ears, not that there was any way to drown out Rize’s voice. “Aren’t you hungry?” Kaneki didn’t reply. “Aww Ken, stick with people huh, make your own pudding mush and eat that instead. We should start with your friend.”

“Hide. I never asked for this, I don’t want any of this.” Kaneki whispered. Standing back up and stepping to the desk. “Hide. I won’t ever hurt you again. I can’t change what happened. So, I’ve got to do this. I’ve got to.” He closed his eyes tightly, and began to eat. 

That night, Kens pillow was wet with tears. His stomach no longer growled and his eye had finally returned to its usual grey sheen. The plate was in the box, perfectly clean, ready to be collected. 

\--

 

When Ken awoke it was to the sound of knocking, Mado rapped his gloved knuckles on the glass, Amon stood behind him, Arima too. “I want to see what kind of Kagune we are working with here. A workman should always inspect his tools, right Amon-san?” 

“That’s right.” Amon replied, all three of them had those white attaché cases close at hand. 

“Now show us one-eye.” Mado sounded eerily delighted. 

“I don’t know how.” Kaneki admitted, he’d been given files about Kagune to read but had purposefully avoided the idea of having one of his own.

“Oh? It doesn’t know how?” Mado tilted his head to one-side. Arima left the room and re-entered through the other door. He was followed into Kens cell by Hide, who smiled and stepped over to Ken. Flinging his arms arounf him in a warm hug. Mado and Amon watched on expectedly. Arima said nothing, he simply clicked his case open and a shining weapon unfurled itself out and into his hands. The blade seemed like an over-sized rapier, with a large curling hilt and swirling patterns spiralling over its structure. 

“This way.” Arima gestured to the door, Hide reached out for Kens hand and they both left, Arima following close behind. His sword held casually by his side, he showed no fear, actually he didn’t seem to show many emotions at all.

The group entered a larger cell, just as Arima had suggested last time. This one had a high celling and no furniture at all, a group of inspectors stood on the other side of the glass window. There were more of them than last time and many familiar faces. Ken swallowed and gave Hide’s hand a squeeze. As per Arima’s directions Ken stood in the centre of the room. Arima opposite him and Hide standing close to the window, behind Ken. 

“Release your Kagune.” 

Ken shuffled, moving into the fighting stance Arima had made him practice for five hours everyday for the past few sessions. “I don’t know how…”

“Release your Kagune.” Arima held his weapon aloft, readying himself for a strike.

“But I don’t…!” Ken started, only before he could finish Arima had struck. 

There was a slight pause, Arima’s movements were two fast for anyone to follow and then “Ow!” Hide gasped. Ken turned his head to look over his shoulder and received his own blow, a light jab to the chest. 

“Kagune.” Arima stared. Hide’s ear lobe dribbled blood, Ken could smell it, he could feel his eye flicker, reacting to the sent. 

“How?” Ken asked, another blow slicing his arm.

“Kagune. Now.” 

This time Ken bent his knees, ready to dodge the next attack. Arima noticed, “If you dodge, this next one will hit Hideyoshi.” Kaneki froze, he could take a few light hits, the blows he has been dealt were already healing. Hide however, Hide was human. Hide was everything. 

“Ken!” Hide called out, “Its okay.” His next words were so softly spoken only Ken, with his ghoul senses, could hear them. “I trust you.”

Ken breathed in, sweat forming on his neck, the smell of Hide behind him. Blood, fear and the overly disinfected room all shifting though his senses. He could feel it, somewhere deep in his lower back. Rize. Inside his mind she whispered and his skin exploded, two red scaled tentacles bursting out. Ken let out a roar of frustration and pain. He didn’t want Hide to see this, but if he didn’t Arima was going to hurt him. Ken darted forward. Arima raised his sword.


	8. Binding Lies

Kaneki awoke later, back in his cell. Hide was here too. “Ken! You’re awake, you scared me, oh no I didn’t mean… don’t cry.” Ken wiped his cheek, glad to see Hide was safe. Well, as safe as you could be locked in a prison with a ghoul for a best friend.

“What happened?” 

“Oh you got taken down. In about two minutes. Arima seemed pleased, I think. He’s hard to read.” Hide stroked Kens hair gently, his quick speech giving away his nervousness. 

“You’re in my cell.” Ken nodded, glancing about. There was no one here, even the space on the other side of the glass was empty. 

“Am I? Wow, I had no idea.” Hide let out a devilish grin.

Ken smiled and brushed away the sarcastic response. “I mean, usually someone is supervising.”

Hide shrugged, “Arima said that was unnecessary. For me at least.” Ken didn’t seem all that satisfied with this response but tried not to think to deeply into it. “Hey, Ken,” Hide continued, “Do you want to talk about what happened?”

“Huh?”

“When I found you in your room.” 

“Oh. Not really.” Ken fumbled his fingers over his chin, “Maybe another time.” 

“Alright.” Hide nodded, going a long with Kens lie for now. “I got a part time job.” Hide announced.

“That’s great! where are you working?” Ken swung his legs off the bed, feeling a slight sting under his ribs no doubt caused by Arima’s blows earlier that day. Hide sat down beside him, close enough for their legs to touch and shoulders brush up against one another. 

“Actually, its here. Well not here-here. Its with the CCG I mean.” Hide saw the look on Kens face and sped up his explanation, “Don’t worry I’m only filing old papers, making coffee, stuff like that. Nothing to worry about.” He leaned forward “Anyway, I wanted to ask you something…” Taking a deep breath Hide tapped his fingers on his knees and pulled all his courage together. “Ken would you….” He was cut short, the door behind the glass had slammed open with a bang and Hide froze at the noise. His hopes shattered and the moment quickly falling apart around him. 

“Yo!” Juuzo was back, face so close to the glass blooms of condensation had sprung up.

Ken stood up and gave a polite response, nodding slightly. Hide was still frozen from having what could have been the best or worst moment of his life ripped away from him. Juuzo pulled the red stitches crisscrossing over their small lips and smiled. “We’re the same age, and we both got stuck with ghouls. Haha. I liked your fight. I want to see how you’ll fair under my knives hummmm maybe next time.” Every sentence from their mouth sounded sing-song, not to mention overly happy at the idea of using knifes. 

“Its nice to meet you.” Ken stared at the desk, his fingers twisting together as he fidgeted nervously. 

“We rushed here right away as soon as someone mentioned a one-eyed ghoul.” Juuzo grinned. “I wonder, if I could draw a picture of you next time?”

Kaneki was clearly nervous, yet his interest was peaked at Juuzo’s words. “Why are so many people interested in One-Eyed ghouls?”

“Oh that’s an easy one. Because there has only been one, until you that is.”

“Owl.” Ken and Hide said simultaneously. Then again, “How do you know that?”

“Haha!” Juuzo laughed, “Do you too always talk like this?”

“No!” Insisted Kaneki, Hide’s retort over lapping him like an echo. 

Hide got up and walked over to the desk where the other two were standing, or in Juuzos case squatting on the desk. “I heard the name when I called the CCG looking for you.” Hide explained, “I don’t know anything more than that.”

“I was just asked if I was Owl, or if I knew them. Over and over.” Kaneki closed his arms over his chest, the memories of his questioning bringing him slight distress. 

“Going nowww, Bye-Bye!” Juuzo waved, sprung from the desk and practically pirouetted over to the door.

Kaneki stepped over to the neat pile of books gathered on one side of the room, he sat on the floor and started leafing though volumes and tapping spines. A habit Hide has seen time and time again. “Hey Kaneki.” Hide tried to get back into the same mind set as before, but that had been lost. Another time, he thought, Another time. “Ken, you protected me during the fight.” The sound of ruffling papers halted momentarily. “I just wanted to say thanks and, well it looked like it hurt, your Kagune I mean.”

Ken shook his head, letting hair ruffle and fall over his eyes. “No, it didn’t at all. Don’t worry.” He tapped his chin again. Hide bit his lip, Ken’s chin tapping habit had become more frequent over the past few weeks. He couldn’t even ask Ken if he was feeling okay without noticing his tic.

“You’d be terrible at poker,” Hide muttered. Ken, luckily, didn’t hear him. He was already lost in the pages of another book.

\--

The next few weeks were filled with training sessions, reading, more training sessions and maybe five different ghoul experts coming to check Kaneki over. That was defiantly the part he liked least. Even though getting beaten up was on the list, that was still better than being prodded and poked by curious people in lab coats treating him like a plastic anatomy model and asking every embarrassing question they could possibly have thought of. Although, Ken did happen to overhear what had become of the surgeon that turned him into a ghoul. “Kanou, gone into hiding, CCG looking all over for him. Not a trace.” 

Ken didn’t pry, he was too busy worrying about this evenings training session. During which he was supposed to fight Amon and his huge ruthless red quinkue. At least Hide was visiting this evening, bringing with him more books. Two things he could look forward to.

“We’re done. You can go.” Ken got up and left, escorted by a guard in white. He wished they would just find whatever they were looking for and leave him alone. To his surprise, Amon and Mado were waiting for him in corridor. 

“You’re training session has been delayed, we’re going to take a detour first.” Amon beckoned, both him and Mado had white cases ready. The guard left with a solemn nod and Mado shifted his case and let out a sharp smile.

“You mean training, right?” Ken asked.

“No, we have the approximate location of two female ghouls in this ward and are going to lure them in and perform a dispatch.” Amon was very matter-of-fact about the affair. Ken knew enough to register that ‘perform a dispatch’ meant exactly how it sounded. 

“You mean…?” He asked, just to be sure.

“We hunt ghouls, to keep the public safe.” Amon’s brow furrowed, “Shinohara thinks you’re a tragic coincidence, Juuzo thinks your fun and Arima seems to think... well no one really knows what he thinks. But we are going to do our job. Hunt ghouls.”

“Besides, if you die, your Kagune will still be usefull.” Mado’s expression was one of cruel glee.

“And, what do you think?” Asked Ken, Amon seemed slightly surprised by the question, he gazed over Ken with distrust in his eyes. 

“I this world is wrong,” He slammed his fist against the wall with an echoing thud, “and you’re the ones making it that way.” 

Kaneki felt rage and pain emanating from Amon, the small cross as his neck swung and glinted slightly. Ken had never met a ghoul, not knowingly at least, apart from RIze. So he had no argument against or fore Amon’s words. Yet, he couldn’t help but think that Amon’s opinion was twisted slightly. Something personal held him in that belief. Then again, maybe he was right, maybe all ghouls were monsters. If all ghouls were monsters, what does that make me? Ken shuffled nervously. 

“You are to eat in your cell, then we will debrief you.” Amon left after they reached Kens room, striding out without another word. Mado just squinted down at Ken before following Amon out.

A CCG worker Ken hadn’t met brought him food later that day. The same dark red mush that could only be described as looking like red bean porridge left out for a few days too many. Other than that all he had to do was sit and wait. Hesitating over his meal Ken eventually scooped the spoon into it and reasoned that if he was going to fight real ghouls then he would need his strength. The strength to fight so that he could come back to Hide, safe and sound. He placed the plate back in the box some time later. The past few weeks had taught him how to fight, dodge attacks and parry, use his Kagune somewhat effectively and everything the CCG knew about the different types ghoul Kagune. Even after all this knowledge had been pored into his brain, Ken didn’t think he could kill anyone, ghoul or human. If all ghouls were like Rize then fighting was the only option. But the date itself had been fine. Only the ending was bad. Bad being what Hide would call, ‘the understatement of the century.’ Ken traced the scar on his abdomen, noticing how the muscles there were far more defined then they used to be. Rize flickered into his reflection in the window.

“Kaneki.”

He didn’t respond. 

“Why don’t you want to fight, get revenge on me and my kind, the ones who did this to you?” Just as the thought blinked though Ken’s mind it appeared on Rize’s lips. He shook his head. 

“Rather than a person who hurts others, become the person getting hurt.” Ken whispered. Rize shook her head slightly and faded out of sight. 

\--

Ken didn’t see Hide or Arima that evening, the only response he got when asking after them was; “Finding those ghouls is more important” and “Arima does what he wants.” Neither of these answers were all that satisfying. 

He was escorted to Mado and Amon by another guard, or perhaps it was the same one, their white helmets and identical uniforms made it hard to tell them all apart. Ken was too nervous to find out the guard’s name, but decided that if he made it back okay he would muster up the courage and ask. 

Outside, Ken felt the sun for the first time in weeks, warm and calming. Despite the layers of cloud cover coating the sky in blue, he could still feel those rays upon his skin. The feeling didn’t last long, Amon placed a strong hand on Kens back and ushered him into a CCG wagon. He sat down on one of the benches running on each side and Amon sat opposite him. Mado went around the front to drive. Both of them kept one hand close to their white cases. “Put this over your clothes.” Amon bundled layers of dark grey body armour into Kens arms. Inside the prison Ken had been given clothes, just shirts and soft trousers that were loose fitting and easy to clean, this armour however was more like that which the guards wore. Only dark, not white. “Don’t bother running away, we have permission to cut you down the moment you try and escape.” Ken fumbled with the straps at his side, his fingers slipping and twisted as he tried to secure the buckles under his arm. Amon watched for a moment. “Arms up.” He sighed, leaning forward to tighten the plate Ken had been struggling with. 

For all his talk, perhaps he has a soft side. Ken thought, thanking Amon out loud and adjusting the shoulder pads. Hide would probably find this gear ridiculous. All bundled up in armour plates, with a bandage covering his eye. 

Amon cleared his throat and began the debriefing, “No one bothered to fill you in I gather. Well, a while ago we met with Jason. An S ranked sadistic ghoul with a streak for torturing his victims. He escaped but his presence led us to catch the lead of two female ghouls, who are believed to be wondering around this ward.” Ken just nodded, keeping his hands on his knees and trying to hide his worry. “We are to find those two before they harm anyone here. Do you understand?” 

“Y-yes.” Ken stuttered, unsure of why he was even being brought along on this mission. Amon must have noticed his confusion because he added, “Arima told us to bring you, don’t ask why, I have no idea.”

“Oh.” Ken gripped his knees, Arima didn’t speak often and never let his feeling manifest themselves outwardly. Then again, it was Hide who was the more observant of the two. What had he been trying to say earlier? Ken had brushed it aside at the time but now, with the possibility of facing two ghouls swirling around in his mind, he wished he had pressed Hide into finishing his statement. 

“Oh were here.” Mado braked rather sharply and Ken had to put his hands on the bench to stop himself from tumbling over. Amon opened the vans back doors to reveal an ordinary street in the familiar Tokyo suburbs. Mado walked around the van side and opened the passenger door, pulling out a sports bag. Something that smelled familiar yet oddly fetid was inside. Rain began to shower down in a slight pitter-patter that rose gradually as they walked down the streets.

“Oh,” Mado sighed in disappointment. “Rain dulls their senses. We may have to come back another day.”

The group turned a corner and Ken heard splashing footsteps and an excited laugh. Not cruel or spine shuddering like Rize’s has been, no this laugh was joyful and kind. Excited like a child. 

“Ready yourself.” Amon ordered, planting his feet on the wet road.

What came around the corner wasn’t a ghoul anything like Rize. She wasn’t cackling about stirring up insides or dripping with blood. She was young, with a flower pin in her hair and an expression that looked ecstatic and filled with happiness for a second before she focused on the three members of the CCG in front of her. Then her face became one of shock horror, eyes widening and shoulders dropping her last word caught in her throat from shock. The rain grew louder and became a chorus to the events unfolding. Somewhere down the street a woman cried out, fearful and panicked. 

“HINAMI!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like I'd give you an Arima vs Ken scene this quickly. Don't worry, there will be one eventually. 
> 
> I'm trying to tie into cannon events, but remember this is a fanfic so of course there will be some moments that don't line up with the cannon storyline.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	9. Instinct Divergence

She was just a child, perhaps twelve, no older than fourteen. Mado was speaking, something about the rain again, Ken’s overlapping thoughts drowned him out. This can’t be real; this is not real. The idea of ghoul children had been completely ignored, until now, the possibility pushed back so far that the idea of one shocked him right down to his nerves. 

Her mother came round the corner, leaping straight to her daughter’s side without hesitation. Protecting her, eyes flashing red, every part of her being ready to do whatever it took to save her child. Her kagune bloomed like a lily and enveloped the two of them in a harden cocoon. Amon and Mado had begun their offence, slashing and hacking the mother’s defensive barrier. They were going to kill them, murder a mother and her child. No, a ghoul, a ghoul and her child. Every lesson from the past week or so flashed though Kens head, he held his helmet in both hands, squeezing his eyes shut and wishing the rain would stop pounding. 

The flower opened, pushing both Mado and Arima back. She was crying, stepping away and beginning to run, her palm brushing one last time against her mothers. “Go Hinami.” Ken understood, she was going to sacrifice herself so that the girl could get away. Her mother was going to die for another, that act was one that ripped through Kens memories and tore at his heartstrings. 

“Ken!” Amon darted forward, but was halted in his tracks by a ground shaking slam as a petal of the flower shaped Kagune slammed down in front of him, creating enough force to crack the pavement. Ken skidded, his boots wet on the road. He saw the girl dart past and he followed the instinct that had been forced into his mind by countless hours of training these past few weeks. He gave chase. 

She was fast but clumsy, tears streaked off her cheeks and joined the rain as she ran. Crying out and slipping with each footfall. Kaneki caught up in about a minute, he reached out and grabbed her. The soft knitted scarf she wore streaming out rainwater from under his grip like a wet sponge. They both slipped, rain pattering down, a sharp pain skimmed over Kens shoulder as he gripped tightly. She didn’t try to get up. Just moaned softly, biting back her lip in an attempt to stop her tears. “M-Ma…”, she stuttered, unable to speak. Ken looked down, he’d gripped her arm in the fall and was still holding it now. One look at her face was all it took for him to let go. 

“No. I want to go where she’s going. Don’t leave me. Dad, my fault…” She curled up sideways, her lungs juddering with heavy sobs. 

“I can’t…” Ken pushed himself away, rainwater soaking though his uniform and dripping off his helmets edge. He wrenched the strap off and threw the helmet to the ground where it rattled and skidded away, joining a torrent of water and being washed down one side of the pavement. “No way. I can’t.” His bandage soaked up rain and the little ghoul sat up, still crying but confused. 

Ken felt the bandage grow heavy with water and slip down. His red eye glinted, “Please.” He said to the ghoul, “run away, I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to hurt anyone.” He felt the words slip out and knew they were the truth. She was just a child, a little girl. A ghoul.   
“I want, to be with my mum.” She stumbled up to her feet and began to walk back towards the officers. “I can’t… I’m alone.” 

“No, wait!” Ken slipped and staggered after her, they reached the corner where clangs and shouts of battle could be heard. Ken grabbed Hinami, holding her back from the fight just in time. Her mother was on her knees, wet from rain and tired of fighting. She saw Hinami in Ken’s grip, met his mismatched eyes with hers and smiled.

“Please.” Her words reached Ken, who held his hands tight over Hinami’s mouth and eyes. Holding back the scream she had built up inside. In an instant her mothers neck was sliced by a fatal blow from Mado, who let out a slight cackle as he did so. Blood mixed with rain, staining the dress that was folded under the mother’s knees. 

Ken shuddered, Mado’s laugh echoing in his head. That level of pleasure from death, that bloody execution without thought or hesitation. For a moment, the smirking Rize and triumphant Mado seemed all too similar. Murder, senseless murder. This was barbaric, thoughtless, a timeless feud scratching rivers of fear through Tokyo steet’s and for what? Peace? Blame? Amon was wrong, Ken knew what had been bothering since hearing the investigator’s words. Ghouls and humans, nothing was as clear cut as the investigators had lead him to believe. Nothing was right. 

Holding Hinami’s hand Ken ran as fast as he could. He had no idea where, just away, somewhere safe. He was a lot faster than he used to be, faster than a weary from the fight investigator. Or so he hoped so. They ran down alleys and streets, across roads and bridges. Footsteps pounding and breath tight, huffing inline with their pace. The rain had toned down, Hinami’s tears had dried up. She noticed Kens eye and shook slightly, panting from their long sprint. 

“You’re a ghoul?” She asked, “You sort of smell like a ghoul…” 

Ken wiped sweat from his brow. Arima was going to kill him. Mado and Amon were going to kill him. Hide, Hide was defiantly going to kill him. Ken couldn’t help but feel awful, Hide would be so confused. What would happen to him, he was the only one outside if the CCG who knew Ken was alive. What would they do to him? 

“Sis!” Himami called out, looking skyward to the rooftops above. Before Ken could identify who she was talking too he heard a cracking sound and a sharp stabbing pain erupted over his back. He wanted to called out in pain but before he could inhale a heavy thud slammed into the back on his head and he fell hard on the ground. Disorientated with the world spinning Kens vision faded to back. This was it, he was dead. Why had he even bothered.

Sorry Hide. 

\--

“Touka. No. You may not kill him.” 

“Didn’t you hear me mention the uniform old man! Shit, if it hadn’t been for Hinami he’d be dead already. Fucking Dove.” 

Ken stirred, his armour had been removed. “Touka, look closely, those clothes are from Cochlea.”

“So what!?”

“Hinami says he’s a ghoul, Cochlea clothes confirms he was confined there. We will wait until he has had a chance to explain this before acting rashly.” The voice was calm and smooth, old and wise, yet carried a commanding tone no one could ignore.

The other voice just huffed, annoyed, anger rippling though every word. “This is bullshit.” There was the sound of a door slamming and Ken opened his eyes to see half closed blinds slicing light into streaks of yellow that folded over the room. 

“Good to see you’re awake.” An old gentleman stepped into view from around the back of the sofa Ken had been placed on. He sat down and leaned forward, placing a cup of steaming coffee of the table between them. “We had to destroy your armour, it had a hidden tracking device inside. I’m afraid you were quite injured earlier, you’ve recovered nicely so far.” 

Ken sad up, his head spun and he steadied himself on the arm of the sofa. “Thank you. But, I don’t think I can drink that.” Ken murmured, unsure of what else to say. 

“Oh I think you are in for a pleasant surprise.” The man smiled, lines creasing his face like crumpled paper. “It would be unwise of you to stay here, the CCG is no doubt, how should I put this, hot on your tail.” Reaching out, Kaneki used the cup to warm his chilly hands. The coffee inside smelled amazing, he gave a tentative sip. The liquid soothed his aches and pains, tasting bitter but not bad. In fact, it was most defiantly the best cup of coffee he had ever tasted. “I suggest the third ward, ghouls currently have a lot of ground there so you should find it easier to hide.” 

“I’m sorry for intruding.” Ken shuffled, “This is delicious.” He almost broke down realising that the bitter smooth coffee tasted exactly as it had done before. Coffee was probably the only thing that hadn’t changed.

“Thank you.” The mans smile faded and his eyes slid open to revel shining red and black Kakugan. “This temporary safety is our thanks for you bringing Hinami back to us, don’t think this means we trust you. We expect you to leave and never speak of this place to anyone.” His eyes burned holes that made Ken shudder with fear. “Do you have anything you want to say?”

“I understand.” He nodded, “I mean, I can’t just switch sides instantly or something like that.” Ken downed the rest of his cup, “Thank you for the coffee, I have a lot to think about.”

“I’ll get you some more appropriate attire. If you manage to escape from the CCG’s radar, then I will be happy to invite you over for another cup.” 

Kaneki stood up and gave the man a small bow, “Ken Kaneki, sir. Thank you.” 

“Anteiku,” the man smiled, “Good luck out there, Ken Kaneki. If you want to survive you’ll need a mask.” He placed a business card on the table, tapped it with a finger and then opened the door to leave. “One more thing, the binge eater Rize, it was unfortunate what happened to you.” 

The door clipped shut. How did ne know about Rize and the binge eater? That name was mentioned in a few of the reports he was allowed to read back in his cell. Most of the sensitive information had been cut out so Kaneki only know the basics, he’d have to deliberate on that later. Ken picked up the card. HySc Art gallery, fourth ward. He gulped, getting there unnoticed wasn’t the only problem. How was he supposed to get food from now on? Ken jumped as the door slammed open with a bang. 

“Here.” A bunch of clothes were thrown in his face by a stern looking person wearing a uniform of some kind. She turned sharply to leave. 

“What!?” Ken called out, pulling the socks away from his face, “I know you…” 

She turned back, her deep purple fringe swishing to one side. “Huh?...You? You were with Rize, why didn’t she eat you…?” 

“That’s… complicated. Thank you for the clothes. This café was one of my favourite places.” Ken’s sentence slowly became a mumble under her glare. The room filled with an awkward pause, “Touka, right?” 

“Yeah.” She huffed, crossing her arms defensively. 

“I wonder, if you could do me a favour…”

“I already did, you’re still alive.” She growled though her teeth, tapping one foot impatiently on the carpet. 

“Hide, the one who came in with me. He asked for your name, light hair, brown eyes…” Touka glared and nodded back. “Well,” Ken continued, “If he comes in here again, would you mind telling him that I’m okay?”

“You’d be better off if I told him you were dead.” She shrugged, “Hinami…” she sighed, facing away from Ken, “thanks for protecting her.” Before Ken could respond she tossed a package on to the table, slammed the door and left. 

Ken got changed, pulling on his new eye patch and buttoning his shirt. He had no place here with these ghouls, no place with humans and now no place with the CCG. All he wanted was to curl up in Hide’s arms safely and stay their forever. He examined the business card once more, fourth ward. Would risking a stop at Hides place be worth it? No, that’s the first place the CCG would look. He had been taught their basic method’s after all. Ken’s mind wondered to Arima, would he be disappointed? 

Ken didn’t want to find out but had a bad feeling that what he wanted wasn’t going to make much difference to the grand scheme of things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cannon: Oh-no.  
> Me: Don't tell me, we're about to go over a huge waterfall.  
> Cannon: Yep.  
> Me: Sharp rocks at the bottom?  
> Cannon: Most likely.  
> Me: Bring it on.


	10. Distance

The park was empty this time of night, the swings suspended silently and see-saw resting sadly on one side. Hide sat on top of the huge yellow hiding dome, its paint chipped from use, countless scuffmarks from shoes marked its surface like signatures of all those who had played here. He shivered, countless lights from windows surrounding the park looked warm and welcoming, but none of that warmth would reach this far down. 

“Ken…” Hide murmured, pulling his jacket closer up around him. The CCG had stormed into his home looking for Kaneki. They had said he was badly injured during a mission and should be found as soon as possible. Clearly they didn’t know if he had run away or was taken by ghouls. He had one kakugan after all, ghouls might have taken him to ask the same questions the CCG had. Questions like ‘who was Owl?’ Why did that name always rise up along with One-eyed ghouls. Hide’s thoughts ticked over, considering every possibility. He’d been visiting this park every night he could since the CCG had told him about Ken’s sudden disappearance. That was two weeks ago, Kaneki had not yet appeared. Surely he hadn’t forgotten about this place, there was no way Ken would forget. Hide had joked about him being a ghoul here once, the memory made him chuckle as he recognised how ironic his joke now was.

Hide yawned and stood up, sliding down the edge of the dome before taking a last look around. By now it was long past midnight, the city was quiet. Knowing he had work in the morning Hide decided to call it a night, he was still part-time at the CCG, mainly so he could keep and eye out for information about Kaneki. Then again, he thought it over, the fact he hasn’t been found yet probably isn’t all that bad, I mean it means they haven’t found a body… Hide pushed the thought to one side. Stars above looked like tiny pinpricks in the night sky. Despite not seeing any of them fall, he still made a wish. “Kaneki, be safe. Please.” 

Back home, Hide flicked on the light and browsed his phone for any ghoul related news. There was an article about an investigator killed by a ghoul known as Rabbit. No clues about Kaneki, Not yet anyway. The CCG had already asked Hide a hundred and one questions about where Ken might be, he’d replied as best he could, but the longer they were kept waiting the more suspicious Kaneki seemed to them. Well, they didn’t exactly trust him in the first place. Many of them had said in angry tones that they had ‘seen this coming’, or, ‘what was Arima thinking?’

No matter what the investigators said, Hide would always trust Kaneki to do the right thing. Not for himself, but for those around him. That’s just the kind of person he was. Hide fell back on to his bed and continued to scroll though his phone, wishing he could just see Ken again, hear his voice. Hold him close. 

Hide’s eyes were beginning to close; he was so tired from the late nights outside he sometimes fell asleep in his clothes. Tonight was no exception, which is why it took him a few moments to realise his phone was buzzing in his hand. Unknown Number flashed up on screen. He pressed the call button and then hit speaker so he wouldn’t have to move from his soft spot in the blankets. 

“This is Hide. I’m awake. Yep, totally awake.” He yawned again, then sat up imminently as he recognised the quiet laugh on the other side.

“Hello Hide, I’m awake too.” 

“Ken.” Hide had to pinch his cheek to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. “Ken, are you okay? Where have you been? Please, come back…” His last words sounded almost like a plea. 

“Hide I don’t have long, remember that book you got me last Christmas? I need you to take it out of the Tomigaya Library as soon as you can, understand?” Kens voice sounded sort of muffled, as if something was covering his mouth. 

“What? Okay, Okay, Ken what’s going on, CCG said you were injured, why haven’t you come back?” Hide’s foot was tapping madly on the floor, his nerves shaking, his palms sweaty. 

Ken, on the other hand seemed almost calm. Which was rather odd considering his normal behaviour. “Hide, I’ll be okay. There are people out there who need protecting. I’ll come back eventually, I just have to prove that ghouls are not the evil everyone thinks.” 

“Kaneki. They eat people.” 

“What do I eat Hide?” Ken seemed a little disappointed by this reaction. 

“I didn’t mean, I’m sorry, I just want you to be safe.” Hide slung his bag over his shoulder and slipped on his shoes, the library was open twenty-four hours so he might as well head off now. 

“I’ve got to go. I miss you Hide.” There was a click and Hide stood still, holding the phone in his hand and gazing down at it. 

“I miss you too…” He said, even though no one could hear him. Hide let out a sigh, checked he had his keys, and headed out. Pausing for a second to quickly clench his chest. His heart beating under his jacket. “He misses me…”

On the other side of the call Kaneki stood in a rarely used phone box, tapping the receiver and fiddling with the zip at his neck. “If its too tight I can adjust it for you,” Uta tapped on the glass and leaned in, showing off his black and red eyes. 

“No, it fits just fine.” Kaneki felt the leather move smoothly over his cheeks as he spoke. He pulled up his hood and stepped out of the booth. “Thank you for showing me Itori-san’s bar.” 

“Not a problem, want to hang out and see some cannibal ghouls tonight?” Uta asked, pulling a finger from his pocket and putting it between his teeth like a cigar.   
“Ghouls eat other ghouls?” Ken questioned, trying to ignore the snapping noise of finger bones between teeth. 

“Um, oh yeah,” Uta swallowed, “They don’t taste all that good.” Ken shifted on his feet, “or so I’ve heard.” Uta added with a wink, fishing out a finger nail from between his teeth, “Want one? I’ve got nine more.” 

“No thanks.” An idea was growing in Kens mind, he tapped his chin and considered it. Ludicrous, utterly ridiculous, then again… “Hey Uta, have you ever met the gourmet, the owl, or Jason?” 

“Not really my crowd.” Uta sniffed, before popping another finger into his mouth. “Well, just come back to the shop if your mask needs adjusting.” He left, still chewing. Ken waved him goodbye, at the bar he’d been told a little more about the Owl, how they were born half-ghoul half-human and had a red eye on the opposite side to his. He’d also been told half-ghouls were stronger than regular ghouls. The idea of him being stronger than anyone, let alone a ghoul, just didn’t sit right. 

Kaneki headed down a nearby alleyway, looking for a safe spot to spend the night before refining the edges of the rough plan slowly building in his mind.

\--

The library was mostly empty, even at this time of night a few dedicated cram school students buried their heads into books, studying for their next exams. Which is what Hide probably should have been doing, he’d missed more than a few lectures by now and would be lucky to pass at this rate. He brushed that thought away, right now Kaneki was more important. There would be plenty of time for re-sits and playing catch-up after he’d made sure Ken was safe. Hide hurried over to the fiction section, scanning shelves for ‘The hanged mans noose’, Ken had owned this book since it came out, but it had unfortunately been thrown out by his horrid Aunt. Since then Ken had taken the book out from the library so many times the listing on the inside was almost entirely taken up by his name. That is until Hide got him a new copy. Kaneki had never complained about his Aunt, he’d said she’d thrown the book away by accident whilst clearing out some old magazines. Hide didn’t believe him, after all, Ken’s habit made it all too easy to spot his lies.

Hide flicked though the books pages, watching lines of ink sail past until a flash of colour caught his eye. A bookmark, hidden on page 112, well more of a sticky note than a bookmark. There was nothing written on it. Just a blank pale yellow square of paper. Hide rubbed his drowsy eyes, a puzzle? This had to be some kind of puzzle. Was page 112 important somehow? Hide considered it, first street in ward 12, no that doesn’t make sense. He looked over the page again noticing how the top of the bookmark, rather than poke out of the book so it could be found easily, had been placed a few lines down. So that no one could see it unless they opened the right page, Hide scanned the first few lines- 

‘Let go of your expectations, you are in the right place, at the right time. Trust your instinct’s at this crossroad, lest you fall to the beast below.’ 

The bookmark rested directly under this statement, as if underlining the words. Hide re-read the phrase a few times over, his sluggish brain slow from lack of sleep. “I’m in the right place. The library.” He muttered softly to himself, tracing the ink with his finger. “At the right time, like, as soon as I could Ken how would you even know that.” He tapped the books spine just like Kaneki would sometimes do, “Let go of your expectations, well that’s easy, I wanted you to be here and you’re not. Crossroads and beast below.” Hide glanced around, as if he’d spot a crossroad passing though the library. He was about to go looking for cross shapes but ‘you are in the right place’ came to mind. The book shelf was sort of like a road, one long straight path from left to right. Hide ducked down, thinking about the beast below. Knowing Ken he was probably referring to himself. Hidden under the bottom shelf, stuck to its underside with tape so that Hide had to force his fingers under the shelf to pick at the edge until it fell into his hand, was a key. 

“Ken, seriously. You couldn’t have just written ‘Hide, if you could just pop your hand down under the shelf for a moment please you’ll find a mysterious locker key I’ve hidden there just for you, tally ho’ old chap.’ Despite his somewhat annoyed tone, Hide was smiling. This was just the kind of mystery he liked, and just the type Kaneki would read about. 

Hide pulled out the sticky note and folded it neatly, tucking it into his wallet as a souvenir of tonight’s events. He then examined the key, recognising it as a Shibuya station locker key. Well, not so much recognise, he just read the small font engraved on one side. Sybuya wasn’t so far from Tomigaya Library, Hide placed the key safely in his pocket. Wonderful, a night time wonder though a ghoul infested Tokyo, what could possibly go wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will contain a puzzle and a prize for any reader who can solve it, so stay tuned ;)


	11. Mismatch

Hide fumbled with the key in his jacket pocket, waiting for an appropriate time to approach the lockers. Not that there was anything suspicious about opening a station locker, plenty of people bustled around and many of them retrieved items from the solid metal grey boxes that lined one wall. Hide checked his watch, 4.30am no matter how late it got the hustle and bustle of people jostling up and down the entrance way never seemed to slow. Shibuya was the second busiest station in Japan after all. Kaneki probably knew that, the more people around the less chance of anyone spotting him. Even Doves would be hard-pressed to draw their weapons here for fear of injuring the masses of civilians around them. Making his way over to the entrance, Hide darted through the crowds towards the lockers. 

The key slid into the slot with a slight grating sound, barely audible over the footsteps echoing up behind him. Holding his breath, he turned it and with a slight click the locker door popped open. Inside was an envelope, nothing all that special, just a single white envelope. Hide carefully placed it into his bag before fumbling around the locker to check for anymore hidden items. Closing the small metal door, Hide glanced left and right before heading back outside, he wanted to read Ken’s message as soon as possible. 

Briskly turning corners and going down streets seemly at random, Hide felt paranoid that anyone might have seen him. He rubbed his eyes for possibly the one hundredth time, far too tired to think straight. After just shy of an hours walk, He came across a Shinto Shrine. He’d been here before, with Kaneki. That must have been a few years ago now, they had been bundled up in coats during a cold new years. Hide remembered the lights on Ken’s face, how he stiffened up in the crowd, how he closed his eyes after writing down his wish to pray that it came true. Now the shrine was void of that life, no one was here this late, not even the gods. Now that he recalled it, what had Kaneki wished for? Hide remembered his wish very clearly, He gazed up at the sky. Hardly any stars were visible from the brightly lit streets, but here a few shone outwards. Being mid October a chill had settled over the air causing each pin prick of light to flicker from blue to white as winter mists crept in overhead.

“I’m still waiting for it to be granted ya’know.” Hide murmured, pulling his bag off his shoulders and taking out the envelope. He picked at its edge and gently peeled open the paper, giving the letter inside a slight tug to loosen it. Unfolding it slowly, Hide tried to relax. Although he knew it could be considered rude, he sat down on the shrines stone steps. His eye’s skimmed back and forth over Ken’s neat hand writing. The layout was rather formal with date was neatly written at the top corner.

‘Hide, we should get coffee sometime, I’m not allergic to it as I thought I might be.’

Hide paused thinking, Ken’s not allergic to coffee… Oh reading between the lines, right. Jeez Ken you’re even more paranoid than me right now.

‘I recently visited a few other wards and learned a lot for my studies. I’ve decided to extend my trip, but before I do I’d very much like to meet with you. Would you be available to meet me at Cyber@Cafe close to Warabi Station? I would very much like to hear about Tanabata again if you don’t mind. From now, I’ll be looking forward to our meeting, I would also like to thank you for all you did for me last November.’

‘Wishing you well,’

He’d forgotten to sign it, or perhaps he was just being overly cautious. Hide noticed the error in the last sentence. Ken had put ‘from now’ rather than ‘for now’. Reading over the note Hide quickly realised there was no time or date for there meeting listed in the letter. Another code, Hide couldn’t help but let out a small laugh and smile. “Ken, I bet some part of you is loving this. Not that you’d ever admit it.”

\--

Somewhere across Tokyo’s towering buildings and criss-crossing streets Kaneki was certainly not ‘loving it’ right now. He watched a ghoul get torn to pieces by their kin, smelt the vile stench of rotten blood and heard every splatter of guts be ripped out from under the unfortunate ghoul’s rib cage. Luckily, no one could see his expression under the mask. He was in an abandoned building in the 19th ward, part of an old storage unit that had long since been left to fall into decay by it’s uncaring owners.

“Oui, oh what odour is this. Such a repulsive stench, a dreadful meal indeed.” There were a few dozen ghouls here, some eating some scrapping and some just standing outside chatting like workmen during a break. One of the ghouls, the one that had spoken, looked incredibly out of place. He had on a bright purple suit with an equally vivid red shirt. “Well, C'est la vie, I’ll be moving on to find something more suited to my delicate pallet.” With an overly flamboyant wave, he strutted out of the shelter. 

“Wait.” Kaneki sped after him, purposely waiting a few seconds first and running slower so that by the time they caught up to one another they would be far from the other ghouls. “Are you the Gourmet, sir?” 

“Oh? And how does a little lamb like you know about me?” He gazed Kaneki up and down seeming intrigued. 

“From… Rize…” Kaneki ad-libbed, the anonymity of his mask giving him a slight boost in confidence. He tried to imagine this was all an act, a stage play, all he had to do was find the right lines until the curtain came down. With the mask giving him an extra identity, it was almost as if the consequences for any actions he took would be null and void. 

“Well, that’s certainly peaked my attention young man.” He breathed in deeply, doing a sort of pirouette and stretching one arm out wards as if about to start a formal dance. “You do have her scent over you, tell me, how close are you?” 

Kaneki tried to think of what Hide would say in this situation, “as close as you can be,” blurted out before he had time to think it over. 

“That is certainly something I had no idea of, I was gracious enough to extend her an invite to my club but, alas, she declined.” His smile turned from sly to frustrated as the sentence slipped out.

“That’s why I’m here,” Kaneki was rigid with nerves, luckily the Gourmet didn’t seem to notice. “She has reconsidered your offer and sent me to, um, get more… information…” Ken’s line faded away as his nerves took over. Standing very stiffly he shuffled the dust under his shoes and tried not to think about the million ways this could all go wrong. 

“Ah, you found out about our positively delightful company and our finest hand picked delicacies then, after a Rendezvous, voilà. You both join us for an evenings meal?” The gourmet had, whilst speaking, taken a step closer and was bowing slightly so that his eyes could look into Ken’s face. Currently his irises were purple, where as Kaneki’s eye, the one not hidden by his mask, was red. Ken still had the package Touka had thrown at him tucked into his pocket, but after seeing those ghouls eating he had been a little put of from satisfying his own hunger. 

“I am the Gourmet and you,” he took a lock of Ken’s hair and brushed though it with his fingers, “are most welcome.” Something sharp raked across Ken’s cheek and he winced, pulling away. “Oh my most humble apologies, sharp nails, my fault entirely.” He grabbed Ken’s face and whipped a white handkerchief from his pocket, pulling up Ken’s chin so much that his toes only just brushed the ground. “There, there. All healed up.” 

Kaneki shivered after being let go, his heartbeat was pounding in his chest and sweat accumulated under his mask with each heavy breath. 

“Nervous one, aren’t you. I wonder why Miss Binge eater would…” He had brought the handkerchief up to his nose and stopped midsentence. “Well, never mind. If you will I’ll happily show you the way to my club, little eye-patch. How about we meet in the 7th ward, a little Café named Light, around noon. Perhaps tomorrow, or, let’s make it the day after.”

Kaneki nodded, although he was chilled to the core with fear, he knew this had to be done. Just like humans, some ghouls caused unneeded turmoil where as others lead peaceful lives. Only Kaneki, with a place in both worlds could find a balance between the two races. Ken adjusted his eye-patch knowing with out a doubt this was most defiantly the most stupid, dangerous path he could go down. The alternatives being go back to the CCG and be executed or join ghouls and have to hunt humans for food. He turned to look back over his shoulder, hearing the snap and pop of rib bones being pried out of place, tendons split and that constant munching overlapping it all. If he had to kill and eat to survive, he should probably make himself useful and go after the bad ones, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First person to solve the puzzle in Kaneki's letter before the next chapter wins!
> 
> For the winner I'll write a oneshot of any ship you want. Can be anything from fluff, vanilla to full on NSFW delete your internet history style ;) 
> 
> Respond in the comments :)


	12. Counter

The next evening, after sleeping through his seven alarms and missing every lecture, Hide woke up. The letter was a little crumpled in his palm, he’d fallen asleep looking over Ken’s handwriting. He had tried to stay up and decipher the code, but the lines had blurred over time until his eyelids grew too heavy to even make out the letters. Slipping out of bed, Hide rubbed sleep from his eyes and got himself a large glass of water. He pressed the cool glass up to his forehead before drinking it down. Time to crack this code, because apparently just asking to meet with someone wasn’t nerdy enough for Ken. 

Hide ripped some spare pages out from his class notebook and rummaged around for a pen, he jotted down ‘Cyber@Cafe’, ‘Warabi Station’ and ‘Tanabata’. As he couldn’t remember ever discussing Tanabata with Kaneki. Tanabata was ‘the evening of the seventh’ in July. The star festival.

“So perhaps meet on the 7th?” Hide mused, no that couldn’t be it, that date was weeks ago and next July felt like years away. “Seven days, oh Seven days from now! Then that typo was deliberate! That must be why he asked me to find the letter as soon as I could.” Hide added the date to his notes, six days now, six days until he saw Ken. Now for the time of their meeting, the only other word linked to a numerical was November. The eleventh month, so eleven o’clock. “Huh,” Hide lent back, “That wasn’t so bad, I suppose ‘extend my trip’ means he is going back out there after we meet.”

The CCG had explicitly told Hide, multiple times, to report any contact from Kaneki immediately. But, those were the same people who wanted to kill him just for being part-ghoul. So Hide decided not to take their advice all that seriously. 

He marked down the date on his phone’s calendar, taking another look at Ken’s letter. Well at least it was some form of communication, even if it was encrypted, and a meeting. Finally, something to look forward too.

\--

Hide didn’t go to the park that night, Kaneki knew because he had passed by the last few days. Every time he tried to take a step towards Hide he had hesitated, like stepping into sunlight. That shivering man sitting on a yellow dome with his jacket wrapped tight, a bag full of snacks at his side, gazing up at the sky. Kaneki would freeze up each time, not wanting to dirty this perfect image. After a while he decided it would be best if he found someway to meet with Hide, after all he didn’t want to see him catch a cold out there at night. 

Kaneki had done pretty well avoiding the CCG so far, he’d had a few close calls but they didn’t seem to think he was any kind of threat. Also, Kaneki realised, not every CCG member knew about him. Otherwise stories of an escaped one-eyed ghoul would be all over the news. He was sure that was all down to Arima’s influence. Ken walked away from the empty park, the streets took him towards the riverbank and he followed them, unsure of where he was headed. His meeting with the Gourmet wasn’t until tomorrow and in the meantime he had no real plans. Streetlights illuminated wide circles on the pavement and the river waved softly, sloshing in its concrete cage. There was another path below Ken, he could see it from where he walked, down past the steep decline. Ken’s ears pricked and he felt something behind him. Ducking behind a cluster of overgrown trees Ken listened out further, he had heard footsteps, fast paced tapping on the ground as someone leapt past him. Running along the parallel road beneath him he saw purple hair and a school uniform. Touka? She vanished into an underground tunnel. What was she doing here? Ken wondered, staying low as two more sets of footsteps quickly approached. 

“There, see Amon, those quick movements are surely rabbits. We have them both now, her and the little girl.” Mado’s voice cackled with eccentric glee. 

Touka and Hinami. Kaneki’s arms began to shake. Careful not to make too much noise he pulled the package out from his pocket. If he couldn’t help them now, then saving Hinami from the CCG meant nothing. He unpeeled the meat, it smelled a little old but Ken choked it down anyway, trying not let to touch his tongue too much. However hard he tried, he couldn’t stop himself from thinking about how good it was to fill his empty stomach.  
Ken affixed his mask, pulled up his hood and slid down the side of the riverbank onto the path below. He landed in front of Amon, Mado had already run into the tunnel. Amon took no time to unleash his Quinke and move into a professional fighting stance. 

“Identify yourself.” Amon commanded, “If you don’t I will have to use force.”

Lines straight from the investigators handbook. Kaneki realised at that point that he didn’t want to hurt Amon, but he didn’t want Touka and Hinami to die either. “Amon.” He called out, hoping to get through to him. 

“Kaneki? I knew we couldn’t trust you, ghouls in the CCG. Never.” Amon spat the words out and tightened his grip on the Quinke’s handle. 

“Listen to me.” Ken tried, Amon’s reply was a pounding strike to the ribs. Two of them definitely snapped and his shoe’s squeaked backwards a few feet before he fell hard onto his back. The rain began. A crashing torrent drowning out the faint noises from the city above. Kaneki spluttered, feeling blood wet the inside of his mask. A punctured lung. He knew because he could feel the bone sliding back into place of its own accord, the muscles connecting it stitching themselves together under his skin. Amon’s footsteps splashed forwards.

“Pathetic. I thought Arima trained you, you’re just a ghoul like the rest of them.” He lifted his huge red Quinke in one hand and hovered it over Kaneki’s face. Aiming to crush his skull, “You pretended to be one of us, but you wear a mask just like the rest of them.” He brought the blunt end of the Quinke down with a jarring thud. Rainwater and drops of blood splashing up around it. 

\--

Districts away, Hide awoke with a start, his heart thumping and sweat dripping from his brow. A bad dream just a bad dream, he looked up at the calendar. Not long now.

\--

The path cracked and Amon gritted his teeth, Kaneki had rolled away faster than humanly possible. Well, he wasn’t a human after all. “Amon! I don’t want to hurt you!”

“Like you could!” Amon twisted and swung his weapon in an arch, pulling raindrops from the air as he did so. Kaneki jumped over him, he was a fine investigator and clearly had the upper hand in terms of muscle and raw strength, but he was slower than Arima. Ken knew if he could distract him long enough Touka and Hinami might be able to escape. As long as Mado didn’t come back. Against one investigator Kaneki avoided blows within a fraction of an inch, but against two? He wouldn’t live to talk about it.

“I know who the Gourmet is, Binge eater too!” Kaneki ducked under another of Amon’s swings so closely he felt the Qunike’s edge brush his fringe aside. 

“What. Are. You. Talking. About!” Amon yelled between a series of sharp jabs that had Ken darting left and right to avoid. 

“I can give the CCG information, about bad ghouls!” Kaneki pleaded, hoping that he might be able to get through. 

“Ha.” Amon slammed his Quinke into Ken once more. A blow so hard that Kaneki was flipped over from the force and felt his head crack on the ground. “Selling out your own kind.” Amon pulled his weapon into a defensive position.

Ken was crouching now, sweating, a boiling anger burning up inside his guts. “You don’t understand!” He screamed, his Kagune ripping out from under his hoodie and spreading four long sharp red tentacles in Amon’s direction. He brought two if them down, slashing at Amon’s Quinke, pounding and grasping at the weapon, the scales scratching through metal with a screeching grating noise. His barrage of attacks continued until Amon’s Quinke finally split, a great crack shattering down the centre and splitting it in two.

Pieces of Quinke lost their colour as they fell, crumbling onto the stone. Amon lay on one side, knocked down by the force of his weapon breaking. 

“But… I…” Amon’s words tumbled away as he realized he had been defeated. He tried to stand, but a red flash cut a deep rut into his side and he tumbled down in pain. Blood soaking into his coat and trickling over his fingers. Tears rolled over Ken’s mask, “Don’t make me a murderer.” He sobbed, sniffing. He screamed, pulling his Kagune back, the rain was slowing and he could make out Hinami’s cries echo out from inside the tunnels mouth. He left Amon on the ground, shocked and wounded. He’d survive the wound, as long as it was treated quickly. 

“You again!” Touka staggered to stand and ended up splashing down to one knee in front of Mado’s face down body. “Hinami!” She called out.

“Its Okay, I’m not going to hurt you.” Ken lifted his arms and shifted so his Kagune flexed and folded back under his skin with a faint hiss. 

“You’ll just, lock us up in ghoul prison huh?” Touka rubbed blood from a split lip and tried again to stand, the wound in her side gushed blood. The skin around it attempting to close up but failing to make it. 

“Sis…” Hinami sloshed forward through the water, “Please let him help.” Kaneki lowered his arm’s and to his surprise Hinami reached out to hold his hand. “I know he smells a bit weird but he’s one of us.”

“Um, thanks?” Kaneki replied, tilting his head to one side with an awkward smile.

Touka let out a chuckle, but soon stopped as the hole in her side ripped open further. “Ouch. Whatever, if you try anything I’ll kick your ass your shitty dove.” Another ghoul splashed down from off the side of the riverbank and strode silently over to Touka, he hoisted her up on to his back and nodded to the others to follow. Giving Kaneki a quiet Thanks as he did so. “I can walk Renji put me down.” Touka growled, making no attempt to get off his back. 

“No. you can’t.” Renji stated blankly, “I think a piece of your kidney is floating down stream over there.” 

Touka just huffed and closed her eyes.

“Erm, Renji-san? I’m Kaneki Ken…” Hinami was still holding his hand tightly. 

Renji nodded, “I’ve been told. Come with us, I’ll tell the manager what happened.” 

Hinami lead him forward, “Come on, you’ll be okay.” She had blood splattered over her coat, but was smiling up at him all the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time... Repas, The Gourmet and more ;)


	13. Rapas

Kaneki slept well on the sofa upstairs in Anteiku. Yoshimura, the manager, allowed him to stay. He even permitted Kaneki to visit from time to time, and ask for food if he ever needed it. Ken was grateful, but shook his head. There were many CCG inspectors knew his face, if any of them saw him here then Touka and Hinami would be in danger again. So early in the morning he had a coffee with the manager before leaving.

“Is this the path you wish to take?” Yoshimura asked, wiping the counter top so that it was ready for another busy day. “You have a place in both worlds.”

Kaneki solemnly shook his head, “I have no place.” He tapped his chin, “I have no one.” He finished his coffee and zipped up his jacket, “Thank you for the coffee.” Adjusting his eye-patch Ken let out a small smile as he placed a hand on the door. 

“I apologize for doubting you, but I cannot force you to stay.” The manager dusted a few older teacups, they rested on the back shelf as if they were too precious to be used.

“I was with the CCG, its understandable I’d be suspicious.” Kaneki had already put aside any ill feelings from the last time he was here. He’d helped Hinami, and by doing that a rush of adrenaline had flooded though him. “I’ll go find others, there are plenty of ghouls out there who are harming society, plenty more who are just living.” 

“Take care of yourself.” Yoshimura let a small smile escape his lips. 

“I’ll try.” Kaneki left the café, morning rays painting the clouds with a flush of yellow and gold. He wondered what Hide was up to, hopefully he would be at the net café come the end of this week. Ken let out a sigh, the air condensed into fog like dragon’s breath. He had the whole day to head over to the gourmet’s meeting place. Plenty of time to survey the area first, just as the CCG would do before any big task. 

 

\--

 

The Gourmet himself sat up high on a throne, surrounded by books. Each colourful spine creating stripes that ran around the room, up and up on the high walls until the twisted spire came to an end. His library tower was truly something special, it was almost a shame that hardly anyone got to see inside. 

Currently he was waiting for his evening meal to arrive. Paper folded under his fingers as another page was turned from ‘The Country of the Blind’ by H. G. Wells. A moth fluttered down, flickering light and shadows around its delicate wigs. 

“Dear Moth! And a wonderful, wonderful night of the world! Do you think my clothes are beautiful, dear moth? As beautiful as your scales and all this silver vesture of the earth and sky?” He quoted, reading out loud from the inked paper in his palm. The moth landed on his finger gently, its wings iridescent under the light. 

“Shuu-sama, your meal sir.” A ghoul in a white mask entered from a doorway down below the spiral staircase. A wondrous smell erupting from the tray in his hands. Shuu Tsukiyama continued to read as the tapping footsteps brought his meal up to him, the ghoul placed it on a small side table, unfolding a white cloth and laying it over Shuu’s lap. The masked ghoul bowed low then lifted the silver bowl from to tray. There, on a plate of pure white china, was a pink leaf. Carved and creased from human skin. Strips of streak from the tanned thigh of a sprinter, topped of with a garnish of peeled tendons and accompanied by crisp cartilage crotons. 

“Merveilleux,” Shuu breathed in the scent. Savouring the warm steam rising up from his starter. Yet, he knew this meal would not satisfy him, usually it would be perfectly adequate for his delicate pallet. However, tonight he couldn’t fully appreciate the fine tastes melting over his tongue, not when he knew how fragrant and sweet the main course would be. After all, the handkerchief tucked neatly into his breast pocket smelled sweeter than anything his servants could put on a plate.

\--

Kaneki had arrived early that evening, or to be more precise, he’d met with a ghoul in a white mask who had driven him far from the cannibal ghoul warehouses. Though Tokyo in an expensive car with tinted windows. They entered a large manor like estate and the ghoul lead Ken to the door. Inside he was shown the waiting room.

Later that evening Ken was showered in a large bathroom a few floors below Tsukiyama’s book filled tower. Tonight he had an important task to do, find information about the Gourmet and write it all down. Then deliver it to the CCG. The Gourmet would be dealt with, then he could go after other ghouls. The Owl, the Clowns, Aogiri and others, he had the basic information all stored up in his mind. A few pieces were missing but it was enough for him to get a good lead. Being a ghoul he could put on his mask and gather more data from others, everything he gathered was written up in his notebook and hidden away. Hidden in the last place anyone would look.

There was a slight tap on the glass, “A set of clothes out here for you, sir.” 

“Thank you.” Kaneki relaxed after they left, he’d let himself get to comfortable. At the CCG and now, with the luxury of a private shower. Being trained by the CCG, even for such a brief time, had taught him to question everything and always remain vigilant. 

This lesson was the reason he checked over the borrowed suit he’d been given. The reason he kept his distance from the white masked ghouls, and the reason he smelt the very faint trace of an unknown element in the coffee he’d been served. He pushed the cup to one side and sat down. When the floor began to rumble and lift up, the ceiling opening to form a rounded mouth, Ken stayed calm. His fists shook, sweat formed on his neck, but his mind was rational, calculating possibilities over and over. 

He remembered the CCG’s file, so when he saw the lines of ghouls sitting high above the area he understood where he was. He knew what came next, but even after reading it, there was nothing that could prepare him for the wave of noise and the crowds cheers, the slick floor stained with past battles and the stench of death emanating from the stones below.

“Tonight! Ladies, Gentlemen and all others! We have a rather delectable treat, a ghoul with an unusual sent.” The Gourmet stood in a theatre box, ghouls in silky red dresses on either side of him, lit up like an actor on stage. His mask looked like a waxing moon, showing a statistic smile and shining white teeth. With an extravagant flourish he tossed a white cloth high into the hair, light shone through it and for a moment Kaneki was cast under its shadow. He saw the red drops of blood that stained its surface. 

Ghouls in the stands began to pass it around, smelling it, wrestling between them to get a closer look at the blood spots. They howled and leaned over to glare down at Kaneki, he couldn’t see their faces, all of them wore masks. Yet he could somehow he could still sense the hunger in their eyes. With a wave, the Gourmet signalled for a door on the far side of the arena to open. Its large metal hinges creaked and darkness seemed to spill from the void inside. Heavy footsteps thudded rhythmically on the stone as a giant strode in. The door slamming loudly behind him. Ken had to only take one look at the zig-zagging metal saw over the giant’s shoulder to knew may have bitten of more than he could chew here. 

His Kagune spilled out from his lower back, two of them creating a defence in front of him. The other two above his shoulders and ready to strike. ‘It doesn’t matter if I die here.’ Ken thought, hearing the low grunting laugh and uneven stomping of the scrapper coming closer. ‘I wasn’t supposed to live, Rize was supposed to kill me, I’m not supposed to be here.’ He tried to keep his head straight, tried to focus, tried to recollect every scrap of advice Arima had given him. 

He dodged the saw, noticing how much slower this Scrapper was to Arima, he wasn’t even as fast as Amon. Although, judging from his size he probably hit harder. The ghouls in the stands were making an awful noise, shouting and screaming at him, calling out for blood. He could just about make out the Gourmet smiling down at him. 

Kaneki hesitated just a second too long, distracted by the Gourmet’s glee. Before he had time to guard, the scrapper had him by the neck. His saw blade was coming down in an arch, aiming to sever Ken’s head from his body. The steel shrieked as it grated against his Kagune’s scales, and clattered onto the ground, skidding away on the stone floor. The scrapper let out a grunt of surprise and his grip on Kens neck tightened. Blood splattered onto the stone floor, droplets flung far as the force of Ken’s Kagune split the Scrappers side open. The man cried out shrilly, like a child, his grip tightened further. Kaneki felt his trachea collapse, he couldn’t breathe, air refused to move out or into his lungs. Inside the pressure built up, scraping against bruises from Amon that had only just began to fade. His vision blurred, his stomach twisted, burning as bile rose up inside him, unable to go anywhere but into his lungs. Above him, he could see the lights blurring, spinning in dizzy circles and the room faded away to black. 

He felt blood well up around his fingers as the scrapper toppled backwards, Ken’s nails scraping at the giant hand clutching him. His Kagune was out of his control now, it flared up stabbing down without hesitation into the soft belly of the Scrapper, until it hit the stone below. Kaneki’s eye was black and red, the sound of tearing flesh and the audience’s shouts fading away.

The scrappers hand began to loosen. Ken felt warmth flood into his neck once more, he threw up and coughed. Hide, Hide was pulling the rope away from him. Hide was holding him close, Hide stroked his hair and smiled. Where are you Hide?

Ken rolled off the scrappers body, if it could even be called that anymore, his torso had been ripped apart. Full of so many holes it was hardy recognizable as a human anymore. Just mush with arms, legs and a head. The cold stone was covered in a sea of red, soaking into Kaneki’s suit and rippling out from where he moved. The ghouls above waved and called out, their voices ebbing and flowing until Ken’s ears repaired with a slight pop and the roar of the crowd assaulted him once more.

“One-Eye!”

“Half-Ghoul!”

“I had no idea this was a ghoul of such rarity! Please, dine on scrapper meat tonight!” The Gourmet stood above him, arm’s out stretched. His words gave Ken an idea, one he acted upon without thinking it over first. He gripped his fist around some hot red pulp, a shattered bone stuck into his palm but he didn’t care. Rage boiled up around him, how many humans had been made to suffer here? How many sick gladiator fights had ended with laughing ghouls and families who would never find their loved ones? Ken’s jaw crushed the bone and chewed threw the stringy tendons, blood blooming over his teeth with each bite of warm flesh. 

With the extra boost of energy that came from feeding, Kaneki regained control of his Kagune. Sending it shooting upwards. Straight through the Gourmet’s Chest. 

Rize giggled, “I never liked that pompous man anyway.” 

His mask slid away, clattering down at his feet. Ken had two tentacles spiked through him. He’d not intended to kill anyone, ghoul or human. His only purpose for being here was to gather intel and then hand it back to the CCG. To act as a mole or a spy, not an executioner or assassin. But everything here was wrong, ghouls needed so eat so they could live just like anyone else. This was too much, to barbaric, to bloody. Gladiator fights had been thrown away centuries ago. This whole place shouldn’t exist.

Shuu Tsukiyama tried to speak, but his mouth just bubbled with blood. He smiled. The audience was silent. Kaneki ripped out his Kagune, flicking off the blood before retracting them back under his skin. Tsukiyama tried to take a step back, holding his insides with folded arms, he slipped and thudded onto the stone below. 

“Assez Juste” he gurgled before passing out. Kaneki scooped up the waxing moon mask, members of the audience had begun to shuffle backwards. They refused to meet Ken’s mismatched eyes. After a few moments of silence, one of then screamed, breaking the tension and causing a ripple of panic to spread outwards as the ghouls. `lost with out their leader they stumbled and shoved to escape. 

Kaneki destroyed the door with a flash of his Kagune and walked into the void. Here, cages of people where kept, some strong scrappers with hollow faces awaiting their next fight. Others were human, shivering and curled up, praying today would not be their last. Ken slashed the padlocks aside on the human’s cages, they hesitated. 

“Scrappers. Someone will come and help you soon.” Kens voice was deep and scraped like stone on stone due to his wind pipe being crushed. His face was covered in blood, so he didn’t worry about anyone recognizing him. “Everyone else, I’ll show you the way out. You should wait outside for the CCG to come and help you.” 

Following the draft, Ken lead the group of stumbling and fearful people onwards. He walked faster than them, but the group could follow his bloody footsteps so this wasn’t an issue. Outside the cool night air greeted them, any ghouls from the audience had long since departed. He didn’t recognise this part of Tokyo, but could see the lights of a main road from here. “Head that way.” He pointed. “I’ll contact the CCG to come meet you.”

Kaneki spread his Kagune and flexed them, aiming to back into the building to have a shower and find his own clothes. 

“T…T…Thank you.” Kaneki blinked, a young girl had spoken, she half hid behind one of the adults and had matted hair so over grown it was hard to see her face. “T...Thank you…” She stuttered again. Kaneki just nodded, if he had waited, if he had spent even one more day getting information about the Gourmet to the CCG, then these people might not have made it. Kaneki turned away, leaving the crowd and using his Kagune to climb the wall and jump in through one of the upper windows. 

He could see down into the area from here, the scrappers body lay mangled on the stone. The Gourmet had vanished, a trail of slick blood leading out of the doors. He’d escaped, this wasn’t over yet. Kaneki found the abandoned rooms below, he washed, changed and left. Searching the rooms for an envelope and pen as he did so. 

Darted out the window and across the garden he glanced over his shoulder to check the group of humans where still alright. His hair was damp from the shower and there were still traces of blood under his fingernails, but those people were safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello,  
> This time I packed some gore, screaming and loads of blood into your midnight snack fanfic.   
> Enjoy :) 
> 
> Next Time... Akira Mado, Hide and Karen will appear - Effulgence.


	14. Effulgence

A few hours later news helicopter’s buzzed overhead. Rows of CCG workers in white coats handed out blankets and hot drinks to a crowd of frightened people. They hurried them all into large cars so that they could be taken safely back to head quarters, where their details could be recorded and families contacted. Scrappers were also taken away, individually and with care so that they could receive the help and treatment they needed.

Amon and a team did a sweep of the gourmets building, but no one was left inside. He returned to the CCG and sat down at his desk, a package had been delivered. Brought up with other items the CCG had delivered over the course of each day. He opened the side, every piece of mail delivered here went through heavy security checks so he didn’t have anything to be afraid of. He pulled out a mask, a waxing moon splattered in dried brown blood. The spots cracked but still relatively new. He unfolded the note tucked inside its single eye socket. 

‘The Gourmet, Shuu Tsukiyama, 月山 習 （つきやま しゅう）Tall, dark purple hair, age 22+. Badly wounded but alive.’

Amon dashed downstairs and to the front desk, “Where is Hideyoshi Nagachika.” He snapped at the secretary there. Who was so busy she had to wave for him to be patient. 

Sofa’s had been pulled into the front area so that the crowd of rescued people could sit and rest, receive medical attention and eat a well deserved hot meal while they waited to be questioned and their families to arrive. Some of them had already been reunited with loved ones and where crying and hugging over family member’s who were sure they’d never see again. Amon spotted blond hair and a bright uniform in the crowd. “Nevermind.” He growled marching over towards Hide, who was handing out coffee and tea to everyone in the lobby. 

“Hideyoshi.” Amon waved him over. 

“Amon-san, tea or coffee?” Hide grinned, happy to be part of the crowd helping those in need.

“This.” Amon shoved the note into Hide’s face. “Is this your boyfriend’s handwriting?”

Hide blinked and read over the note a few times, “He’s not…never mind… That’s Kens handwriting yeah.”

“You’re sure.”

“Absolutely, he’s got those little flicks on the ends of his Hiragana characters. Plus, its just like Ken to write down a name with both spellings and the pronunciation.” Hide couldn’t help but smile, but his grin faded when he noticed the smudges on one side of the paper. “Is that blood?” He asked.

Amon whipped the note away and examined it, “Possibly, I’ll take it to possessing to find out.” He marched away, his feelings in turmoil and unable to express himself. A ghoul, working for the CCG? He fumbled with the cross at his neck and headed back up the the office. He waved over a few officers on his way down the hall and called out a brief instruction. “I need to call a meeting,” He showed the the mask, “Over this.”

“Tell him not to take the masks.” A higher voice sounded from behind Hide. He turned around to see a tall woman in a fitted suit and pencil skirt. Her toned arms crossed over her blouse. 

“I’m sorry?” Hide asked, the tray in his hands feeling heavier. 

“If he takes the mask, the ghoul gets a new one and we have more difficulty recognizing them. He should just draw us a picture or describe it. Then we know what to look for.” She flicked a stand of hair out from her eyes.

“Umm… I don’t know how to tell him that, I haven’t seen him since…” Hide’s words were cut off.

“If Arima is letting the little one-eye run around doing whatever he wants then I am in no position to argue, but if he comes back,” she lent in closer, “He’d better have a good reason for letting Rabbit escape.”

“Sure.” Hide gulped. She picked a cup of tea from the tray and turned away.

Hide went over to the front desk, “Excuse me, could you please tell me the name of the officer I was just talking to?”

“That would be Akira Mado.” 

“Thank you very much, here two sugars right?” Hide placed a coffee on the counter and the secretary blushed a little.

“Well aren’t you sweet, Thank you.”

Hide smiled and continued to hand out drinks, picking up snippets of conversation as he did so. “Mama, he had one scary eye!”, “A ghoul let you out? Are you sure?”, “I couldn’t describe him, he was covered in blood.”, “I felt for sure I was going to die down there.”   
“He was just a boy, and he cut the cage open with a strange weapon.” Hide walked back into the cafeteria area to get more hot drinks. Another group of people walked in, crying and laughing at seeing the relatives they once thought were long gone.

Putting his tray on the counter the staff smiled and began to fill more cups with steaming hot water. “Hideyoshi-kun, isn’t it wonderful!” Ayumi, who worked behind the counter of the coffee shop, smiled. “All those families coming back together.” 

“Yeah, it sure is.” Hide gazed out of the open door at the groups embracing one another. To his surprise, he spotted Arima on the other side if the lobby. Adjusting his glasses and letting out a small smile he surveying the crowd. As if he knew this was going to happen, or had been betting on it. 

“They say a Ghoul saved them, but that can’t be right? Can it?” Ayumi loaded the tray with cups and Hide carefully slid it off the counter and into his hands. 

He gave her a sly smile, “Well, why not?” He left before getting a response, the whispers running through the crowd gave him a clearing and clearer picture of what Kaneki was up to.

Hide’s tray quickly emptied as the new comers formed groups around lost loved ones, they thanked him with tears in their eyes. The tray was empty and was about to turn back for more when he felt a tug at his jacket. Crouching down he greeted the scruffy little girl who wanted his attention. She played with her hair and wiggled her bare toes across the ground. “Um, I think I saw my Pa near the door. But its so crowded…” Her nose twitched as she began to snivel into the blanket she’d been given.

“Hey, its okay, its okay we’ll find him.” Hide patted her head. “Here, I have an idea.” Hide put the try on a table and hefted the little girl onto his shoulders, she was light and in need of a good meal. “Can you see him now?” 

“Urrmmm…” Hide slowly walked towards a group who had just entered the lobby. “PA!” She called out, jumping up so much Hide had to wobble to keep her steady. He laughed and carefully walked over to a man who had broken down into tears at the sound of his daughter’s voice. 

“Sachi!” He cried out, lifting her from Hide’s shoulders and enveloping her in a huge hug. “Thank you thank you thank you.” He rocked her from side to side and wrapped the blanket close around her. 

Hide nodded, walking back into the crowd. Lucky name for a lucky kid. “Wait.” The father called out, Hide turned back, “You work here, if you see the colleague who saved my girl, please give them our thanks.” 

“Pa, it was a ghoul. A ghoul saved me.” Sachi muttered sleepily into her father’s shoulder. 

Hide left through the crowd, the idea that a ghoul saved these people had spread quickly and the CCG members couldn’t control the rumours flying though people’s minds. Some families were at the front desk, asking about the ghoul and what this all meant. Others just seemed confused and were discussing theories.

The few workers here who knew about Kaneki seemed to be in two minds, on one hand he had prevented Amon from helping Mado, and doing so had inadvertently lead to Mado’s death. Yet now there was this, a grand total of thirty-four people returned to their families. Not just random citizens either, after further investigation they had discovered a famous singer who had vanished a month ago. A diplomat who came from over seas and had never returned home and the young daughter of a wealthy business owner who had vanished from her ninth birthday party. Everyone here met the characteristics of victims thought to be taken by the Gourmet, meaning that the mask and note Amon and received had to be legitimate. Kaneki Ken had saved these people. The half-ghoul still needed to explain himself for Mado’s death, but many investigators were beginning to understand the upsides to adding Kaneki to their ranks.

No matter how much they tried, by the end of the day every investigator knew that a half-ghoul had brought these people home. By the next morning it was all over the news. 

\--

When Hide headed in to university every news channel had something about the ghoul survivors, a few even had interviews. Panels of people discussed what this meant for ghoul kind and how a half-ghoul was even possible. They all assumed that a human and a ghoul must have a had child, good thing too, if people knew you could artificially create ghouls then there would be panic in the streets at people worrying if their neighbours had recently become flesh eating creatures.

Luckily, Kaneki had not been identified, otherwise ghouls would be after him too. Although they would be more suspicious of new comers after seeing this. Almost over night, the Tsukiyama company folded and ran from Toyko. A few famous names who had associated with them were put under investigation, but were released when the blood tests revealed their RC levels to be normal. Tsukiyama had not been located.

The world had changed, ever so slightly, but it was a change none the less. All because of Kaneki. Hide smiled, flicking over stations and taking in the debates. There was still a lot of negativity, some people claimed it must have been a ghoul imitator or that this was part of some bigger plan. Others discussed the idea of having a ghoul containment centre where they could live without harming humans, little did they know one already existed. But their campaign’s sounded more like a housing settlement, rather than the prison Ken had been kept at. 

Hide gazed up at his calendar, not long now. He’d already packed a bag with books for Kaneki, as well as a few spare sets of clothes. If only his classes would pass a little faster. Plenty of rumours about a one-eyed ghoul saving a group of people passed though the university campus. The topic was whispered about in lectures, discussed in the cafeteria and debated in the club rooms. By now, Kaneki’s disappearance was old news, which was probably a good thing for Ken. If any teachers recognized him they’d get an awful fright. 

“Hey Hideyoshi,” Nishiki called out to him from a few classrooms down the hall. 

“Nishiki-Senpai, What’s up?” Hide tried to act as aloof as usual but his mind was so full of Kaneki it was hard to relax. 

“English Professor, what’s-her-face was looking for you.” 

“You don’t know her name?” 

“Why should I?” Nishiki shrugged, “I don’t study literature.” He marched off, acting even more irritable than usual and crushing his empty coffee can in his hand. Hide turned back and headed towards Ken’s old classroom. Remembering how Ken's letter had mentioned coffee, there was something more there, he just handn't figured it out yet. Ken classroom came into view, he’d been here plenty of times, Kaneki would usually end up staying after lectures to read and Hide would have to come over and remind him to leave before he fell asleep at his desk. 

This lecture room was pretty similar to all the others, benches and tables sloped upwards so that every student could see the teacher’s podium and the large blackboard on the wall. “Hideyoshi-san?” a woman with hair tied up in a bun and round glasses asked politely. 

“Urm, yes” Hide nodded, adjusting his bag and stepping forward. 

“I’m sorry I hadn’t had time to tell you how sorry I am about Kaneki-san’s passing. I understand you were a close friend and so thought you’d like to pass this on to his family, I found it where he usually sat. I suppose he must have lost it there.” She handed him a class notebook, Hide recognized the dark blue binding as well as the neat handwriting on the cover. 

“Thank you.” Hide took it with both hands and brushed its front. 

“He was a good student, please pass my grievances on to his family.” 

Hide flicked over the pages, Kaneki’s handwriting was neat and his notes intricately detailed. “He doesn’t really have a family, he’s, he was all alone…” Hide found his shoulder’s shaking, he’d spend too long trying to be brave. Too long acting as if everything was fine, the stiches on his finger throbbed as he hugged the notebook close. 

She patted his shoulder, “He was a very diligent yet quiet student. I noticed something in the back and thought it best to pass his notebook on you to.” She fumbled in her handbag for a moment then handed over a packet of tissues. “I’m afraid I have to lock up now.” 

Hide nodded, wiped his face and headed out. The book cradled safely in his arms. He headed over to the café so that he could find a quiet place to sit down and flick though the pages. He paid for a bottle of sofa and sad down in a corner booth, a few other students where chatting or working here, but it was quiet enough for Hide to focus. Besides, no one wanted to disturb him after seeing the red evidence of recent tears staining his eyes. 

She was right, at the back of the notebook was a page addressed to him. This time it was dated two days before his accident with Rize.

Hide,   
I want to tell you something. This thing in my mind, it’s the only emotion I have trouble putting into words, or even finding words for. Under that a few sentences had been scribbled out. Then Ken’s handwriting begun again; Hide, there is a famous poem by E.E Cummings.

At that Hide let out a snort of laughter and then another when he read the next line.

Don’t laugh at his name Hide, it’s a classic poem. Anyway, its not quite right... he’d scribbled out a few more lines before continuing. Hide, I miss you. Just look at Walcott, Derek. Last two stanzas. X/X. Neruda. I don’t know Hide, sometimes I feel sad about all the books I haven’t read. Thanks Hide, for the drink. Someday I’ll pay you back.

This paragraph was written in a different coloured pen. Hide cracked open his soda and took a swig, smiling out at the darkening sky. Kaneki missed him, the idea made his heart glow with warmth. Not long now, not long at all. Hide pulled out his phone and tapped in ‘Walcott, Derek’. He was a poet, but which poem of his was Kaneki referring to, and what did X/X mean? If Ken wanted him to solve his riddles he should have made them a little simpler. 

“I’m not as smart as you Ken.” He muttered, taking another gulp of soda and tucking the notebook into his bag. He hoped Ken was staying safe, sneaking into University just to make adjustments to his notebook was risky. Hide checked his hand, the teeth marks were healing cleanly, ‘thanks for the drink’, Ken’s humour sure had darkened recently.

\--

Tokyo hummed with the constant flow of electricity running though its luminescent streets. Kaneki had found a rooftop to sit and watch the crowds go by. He knew the The Gourmet was still out there, probably desperate for a meal to help heal the injury Ken had given him. If they met again more blood would surely be spilled. Kaneki shivered, he wasn’t cold, he’d borrowed clothes from under the coliseum and had a warm dark blue coat on, with black fluff around the hood the tickled his neck. His mask was safely tucked inside his pocket, but he still had his eye patch, he’d found some money at The Gourmets place and bought a surgical style mask. To everyone else it just looked like he was ill, or a J-rock fan. Ken did feel a little guilty at stealing money, but the Gourmet had tried to kill him, so he supposed it was only fair. 

His nose picked up a strange smell, he pulled down the mask and sniffed. Blood. Now that he was part ghoul smells were easy to identify. A shame all the food smelled fetid, even fresh vegetables from the super market where he’d got cans of cold coffee smelled like rotten maggots, infection and road kill. He made the decision to stick with vending machines after that.

The sent seemed to grow closer. So Ken darted to one side and hid behind a large rooftop air conditioning unit. He heard the metal squeak of the fire escape door, somebody came though. Ken could just about see their silhouette. A long cloak and masquerade style mask, just covering their eyes. It caught the light, shining white with simple gold patterns around the eyes. They breathed in deeply, and gazed over at Kaneki’s hiding spot. 

“I know you’re there.” They held a white square of fabric, a handkerchief. Ken’s blood spotted its surface. He couldn’t help admire the skill of this ghoul to track him down like a blood hound just from those few drops. Ken slipped on his ghoul mask and pulled up his hood before standing. 

“Are you the one who hurt Tsukiyama-sama?” Kaneki didn’t respond, through the ghoul’s white mask he could make out two burning black and red eyes. “You are, aren’t you. The others want to just let you go, but I can’t, I wont. You hurt Master Shuu!” With that, the ghoul darted forward, Kaneki leapt onto the air conditioning unit and avoided the spiked Kagune branches that swung around from the ghoul’s back. This wasn’t good, he’d only eaten a small package from the café and a handful of scrapper meat, not enough for a fight like this. All his energy had gone repairing his broken windpipe and other various damages and lesions. A fight right now, especially with another Rinkaku user, would not go well. His thoughts were confirmed when a whip of prickles tore through his side. So this is how another Rinkaku fights, Ken twisted and landed, rolling over into a crouch and releasing four red twisted limbs from under his coat tails. The scales glinted, reflecting the light of city streets below. His side stung as cool air touched the wound. The other ghoul snarled and twisted their thorny Kagune branches. Ken’s stomach grumbled, he was hungry once more. 

So, so hungry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im sorry to make you wait for Hide and Ken to meet, I'm trying to write whenever I can so that you don't have to wait too long. Hopefully the Japanese can be soon okay, I got it from the fanwiki so feel free to correct me if I've got it wrong. 
> 
> In the meantime, I did a small sketch during a train journey, Its based on the fluffy 'Confessions' fic. You can see it here :) -  
>  https://archiveofourown.org/works/15703062/chapters/36900417#workskin 
> 
> Drawing people kissing is hard ;-;   
> p.s Ive already written out the next chapter it just needs editing so hopefully I can post it soon :)


	15. Thorn

The clash of Kagune on Kagune created sparks of lightning and thundered with an echoing crash. The two ghouls pushed one another from roof top to roof top, sometimes being thrown over roads a hundred meters below only to be caught by the concrete ledge of another apartment complex towering out of the ground like an iron tree truck.

Kaneki had no time to think, this ghoul was slower than Arima yet faster than Amon. They knew how to use their Kagune with expert precision, each blow aimed directly at a vital body part. 

“How dare you hurt my Tsukiyama-sama! How dare you place your filthy Kagune on his perfect skin!” The thorn’s whipped past so fast they were barely visible, each one slicing tiny cuts though Kens clothes and skin, the healed quickly but each one took away a small portion of his remaining strength.

Ken was too busy defending himself to reply, his side ached and he felt hunger pangs rise up with each movement. The cut had not fully healed, the bleeding had stopped and skin stretched over but inside everything was out of place and torn apart. Another streak of rose thorns tore open his sleeve, whipping back only to be replaced by another which gouged deeply into Kaneki’s thigh. He felt his body being tugged by the barbed spear wedged though his leg, the prickles pointed down like an arrow head so the more he pulled away the more damage it caused. Threads of his hamstring muscle were cut one by one, snapping like piano wires and sending shocks of electrical pain up his back and down to his sole. 

The ghoul laughed, sure of the victory. “I’ll bring you back to the young master, he will gobble you up and be healthy and happy and for me he will he will…” The shrieks of laughter continued as thorns rained down. Kaneki sliding left and right to dodge them, splitting more ligaments in his leg until the ground was soaked with blood.

“You need food Ken.” Rize was pinning him down, one hand digging into his shoulder so fiercely that he felt skin split and her nails shatter his collar bone. “You need to eat. So eat.” She flickered out of sight but the pain in his shoulder remained. Another branch of thorns was buried there. Blooming blood rose stains on Kens coat. With his free hand, he unzipped his mask. 

“How did you manage to harm him? You can’t even stand up to me. You’re weak, pathetic.” 

No. Kaneki thought, he was going to meet Hide. He was going to see Hide so he couldn’t die here. He had people he wanted to protect. He’d do anything. He’d go though any pain rather than see harm come to Hide. 

The thorns twisted, tangling strands of muscle and splitting blood vessel’s. Kaneki ripped the one from his shoulder and bit down deeply into it. The taste was like rotten apples and out of date milk so sour it had solidified in the bottle. Munch. Ken’s jaw chewed through it, even as the spikes tore through his cheeks he still crunched down on strips of chewy Kagune. The ghoul seemed surprised, they yelped like a beaten dog and tried to pull back the Rinkaku limb. But Kaneki’s grasp on it was vice-like and unyielding. Even when a thorn cut through his index finger and caused it to come loose from its socket and tumble to the ground. Even as a giant splinter shot through his palm he kept his grip tight.

His leg stung as the ghoul attempted to shake himself loose. The Kagune’s thorns, once a weapon, were now working against him. Once the branch had been severed so the rest of that limb began to dissolve into crumbling scales. Kaneki gripped the branch in his thigh, tugging it closer so that more and more of the thorns slit open his leg. Scraping against his bone with a noise like nails on a chalkboard. 

Ken’s mind was blank, his fingers bloody and teeth scraping, snapping his lips snarling. Pulling closer and closer his Kagune flicking back every snaking attack. He pulled the thorns, uprooting the trails that spun intertwining within the Ghouls back. The scream rose up and out over Tokyo, shrill and ear splitting, a few people down below and in the buildings heard it. Looking out through split blinds they didn’t spot anything strange. Above them Ken pinned his attacker and brought his teeth lower to crunch into the layered bones on this ghoul lower back.

After the cries calmed Kaneki realised he had been crying out too. The ghoul, who had been tense and clawing in a fruitless escape attempt, went limp. Their body thumped down as Ken backed away. Spine exposed and with Kagune splinters sticking though their skin. Ken stumbled, ripping off his bloody coat and using it to wipe his hands and face. They tasted like the slime on rotten vegetables, apples cores left out in the sun too long spotted with wasps and rot. The Kagune was like crunching down into a dead mouse and hearing its bones pop while every manner of rotten gore it had eaten split open and poured into your mouth, tainting it so no food would ever satisfy you again. 

He spat, licking his teeth. Ghouls tasted bad, really bad. Yet they still gave him strength. Uta had mentioned something about cannibals going mad over time, but Ken thought that after everything he’d been though, going mad seemed like a fine way to fall. His attackers body had started to slip forward. Kaneki tried to reach them in time, but the scratches riddling his body caused him to stumble and the ghoul fell past his fingertips. He heard the crash a few seconds after, then a scream. Kaneki’s strength came back slowly, his wounds healed enough for him to stand and leap over a few rooftops. CCG cars blaring out sirens passed though streets down below. Ken paused to take a breath then noticed a scent that seemed familiar.

“Karen! Karen!” The Gourmet sat hunched on a rooftop downwind. He cried out softly, the CCG had raided his home soon after Kaneki’s letter had arrived on Amon’s desk. His family’s company had been taken down, most of them were dead or locked away. “I told you not to go.” The Gourmet whimpered, seeming far feebler than before. “You found me, we where supposed to go home. Karen…”

Kaneki felt his chest turn. Watching the Gourmet moan and whimper, his suit stained crimson, the sight was pitiful. He was about to leave, only was spotted before he’d had the chance. “You…” The Gourmet choked, he tried to form his Kagune but it disintegrated before taking shape. “You… I just wanted a taste. Haha, the greedy get what’s coming to them in the end.” Kaneki made his way over to him, the Gourmet was still spitting words though bloody teeth. “Oh, don't let's ask for the moon. We've already got the stars.” He stumbled back and ended up slumping down on the concrete rooftop.

“Batte Davis.” Kaneki recognised the quote and sat down opposite him, unafraid of a dying man. 

“Oui, although overall I prefer books to the cinema.” He adjusted his arms and Kaneki caught a glimpse of the wound he had inflicted. The fact the Gourmet was still able to speak was impressive, he’d almost been torn in two. “This hymn they have to gurgle in their gullets, because they cannot speak it in full words.” He choked on the last line as a slither of blood tricked out from under his arms.

“Dante’s Inferno.” Ken nodded.

“Oh? You a fan of books Kaneki Ken?” 

“There is more treasure in books than in all the pirate's loot on Treasure Island.” Ken replied.

“Ah, Robert Louis Stevenson” The Gourmet smiled, “It’s Shuu Tsukiyama by the way. I wonder, could we continue this a little longer? It can be hard finding anyone who has such a strong passion for literature as I do.” Kaneki just nodded and Shuu Tsukiyama thanked him, thinking up another quote for Ken to try and Identify. “That’s the good part of dying; when you’ve nothing to lose, you run any risk you want.”

“Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury.” Kaneki smiled, he had enjoyed that one, although it depicted a world he would never want to live in. “You poisoned me with a book once. I should not forgive that.” He responded with his own quote. 

Tsukiyama chuckled, “Too easy young Kaneki, The Picture of Dorian Grey, of Course” It took Shuu a while to think up another quote, and when he did he spoke softly, his eyes beginning to glaze over. “For the present your friend, tomorrow your host, for the short time formality stands between us…” His words trailed away.

“The Count of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas.” Kaneki lowered his head, realizing that he would probably never again find anyone well read enough to play this game. “For after the Battle comes quiet.” Kaneki spoke to the stars. The Gourmet did not respond. “Tsukiyama, you’ve got to know this one.” Shuu’s body slumped to one side. “Please tell me the answer, please…” But echoes of his own sobs were the only reply he could hear.

Ken’s Kagune shifted snake-like towards Shuu, enveloping him in a mass of shining red scales. For just like Shuu, if Ken didn’t eat to heal his wounds, then he would die. “Its H.G Wells, Tsukiyama… Shuu.” There was only one thing the Tentacles wanted, that shimmering organ filled with rich nurturance and poisoned berries. Ken found the Kagune sack pulsing in his hands before he could even comprehend what he’d just done. 

He tried to push the meat away, but Rize tutted and one of his own Kagune slammed down into his chest, pinning him to the ground. The dripping sack hovered ever closer to Ken’s mouth, its smell putrid and foul. “No, I don’t…I can’t…” His Kagune snapped a rip which punctured though the skin on his side. “Stop!” Ken squirmed, “I am in control. I am.” 

The food was on his lips now, blood slick like oil dripping into his mouth. Rize laughed, “Eat, or you’ll be too weak to resist slaughtering a butch of screaming humans. Ah, I do miss that noise.”

Tears rolled over Ken’s cheeks as he bit though its foul membrane, causing a surge of nauseating filth to bubble into his mouth. ‘So he tasted the deep pain that is reserved only for the strong, just as he had tasted for a little while the deep happiness.’ Ken wished he could have asked Shuu that quote next, and others, and a thousand more. They could have sat on the rooftops and recited every line they’d ever read and it still wouldn’t be enough. Salty, metallic and greasy dribbles tricked from Ken’s fingers. Then, he swallowed.

\--

Hide gazed out of his window, he was sitting up in bed with Ken’s notebook open on his knees. The notes seemed planned out, but there were errors and marks running though them, Kaneki would not usually make these kinds of mistakes. He tapped a pen rhythmically on his knee. Recently he’d found sleep hard to come by, his dreams were filled with Kaneki bloody and running. Taking a peak though the CCG’s files didn’t help. He’d seen the photographs of a darkened area and snapshots of a body torn to red pulp. 

“Kaneki, you’d better be safe out there.” Time seemed to past in horribly slow increments. All he did was wait for the day Ken would meet him. Thinking and rethinking what to say and what to bring. Passing though a shop yesterday he’d almost picked up one of Kens favourite hamburgers before remembering he couldn’t eat them anymore. He’d taken some of his savings out in cash in case Ken needed money and picked up Ken’s pre-ordered book. Hide yawned, scratching his neck and feeling his scarred fingers itch. He’d picked up a copy of Ogura Hisashi’s book about ghouls. The volume was hardback and heavy but the information inside written well enough for anyone to understand. Even the scientific parts had well drawn diagrams and definitions of any words those outside of the scientific community wouldn’t know. 

Hide had enjoyed the first few chapters, but right now Ken’s notebook seemed more important. Only, whatever type of code this was it didn’t seem like there were any clues to solving it. The neat lines he had struck though words weren’t in any kind of order and the words themselves make little sense when written out on there own. But Hide kept trying, there had to be something here after all. Some of the mistakes were far to obvious, Kaneki wouldn’t misspell the names of authors after he’d spend years pouring over their books.   
He flicked over the pages and came across something unusual, a drawing of an eye patch. Well, more like a square with two loops attached to it, had been scribbled in the corner of the page. The mark was small, yet it was evidence enough that Ken had written in this book after the accident. Hide held the pages to his chest, it smelled nice. After bookmarking his place with a scrap of paper from his own notebook Hide opened up his phone. He liked to read more and more of the circus escapees stories, that was what the news was calling all the people Ken had saved. Hide wasn’t allowed to keep any of the thank you notes sent to the CCG, but he did take a few sneaky pictures. Many of them mentioned a one-eyed ghoul and asked that the CCG spare his life. Others just thanked him for helping, and some pleaded that the topic of ghouls and humans be re-thought entirely. 

The newspapers and online blogs seemed to be locked in a fast paced text war, with the papers trying to claim it was a CCG spy and not a real ghoul. Online blogs lead by Dr Ogura would fire back with facts, ‘ghouls have a highly refined sense of smell they would recognize an imposter instantly!’ Those advocating for ghoul rights were small in number but passionate and willing to share their stories. A young boy got millions of hits online for talking about a ghoul who threw stones across the road to get his attention so that he could find his injured dad. No one could really tell if any of these stories were true but they sparked a new hope though Tokyo that few had ever seen before. All because of Ken. What was he doing now? Ogura’s book said that ghouls could eat other ghouls but there were often unpredictable consequences. Those few lines had run though Hide’s mind more than once, he had a feeling he knew what Ken would choose if he had to pick between eating ghouls or humans. Psychological side effects or not.

Hide got ready for bed, still flicking down the social feed on his mobile. His toothbrush slipped from his fingers and clattered into the sink. ‘Two ghouls found dead, both with horrific wounds.’ He skimmed though the article, the descriptions didn’t match Kaneki’s. The papers just went on to talk about how only another ghoul could have caused this much damage. That one good event didn’t mean all ghouls had changed. One of the ghouls was thought to be the Gourmet and the other his ward. Hide could get more information tomorrow. Kaneki had told the CCG the Gourmets name, so there must be a reason that information hadn’t been pasted on to the papers. Most likely it was to prevent panic, after realising a well known company was run by ghouls everyone would become suspicious that their neighbours might be ghouls, then fear and panic would spread. No wonder half the CCG were on edge, dealing with ghouls was hard enough without panic in the streets. Let alone the idea that a ghoul could be created though surgery. Hide bit his lip, “Ken… Come back soon.”

\--

Kaneki headed towards the net café, he was early but the slit in his side wasn’t healing very well, He’d pushed the bone back inside but it hadn’t settled yet. So he decided to just wait here a few days, regain some energy, he didn’t want Hide to see him like this. Besides, he needed some time to think, something inside him felt uneven. A bubbling uneasiness, like an active volcano, it was only matter of time before it exploded. Shuu and Rize didn’t get along. The other ghoul, Karen, was lost somewhere and Ken’s kagune seemed to be twisted under his skin, moving around and tearing itself into pieces. Some if it seemed to settle in his shoulder blade and Kaneki winced, opening his eyes. He’d been walking though town without thought, round in blocks from the station until the streets took him back there again. He’d been wondering around too long, he needed so find some place safe. The money he’d taken from the Gourmets house was just about enough for him to stay over at the net café. Staying there overnight didn’t feel safe, but walking around aimlessly was no good either. 

So he paid enough for him to stay until Hide arrived, curled up in a booth close to the back with a hot cup of free refill coffee and pulled on a pair of headphones. Selecting an audio book, he closed his eyes. The narrator spoke softly, echoing out words Ken had read many, many times, 

“One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in bed he had been changed into a monstrous verminous bug….”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fighting, Blood, Midnight Snack and Literature references.   
> Thats my Fanfic checklist done for today. 
> 
> I tried to think of something good for Shuu in this chapter, I really hope you like it.


	16. Unison

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its short, I'll write more next time

“…a look of human understanding, challenging me to do the thing of which both of us are thinking.” Kaneki opened his eyes, the audiobook of short Kafka stories had finished. After glancing at the time he realised Hide would be here in less than an hour. He got up to stretch his legs and refill his coffee cup. 

\--

Hide rode the train through Tokyo, his backpack heavy, rocking back and forth on his heels. He was the first one out when the train stopped and almost vaulted over the ticket barrier in excitement. Café@Cyber was very close and it only took two turns or so for him to reach the small entrance. He slowed down at the doorway to catch his breath, skimming over the various signs and price guides for the shop. 

The door rang slightly as he pushed it open, entering timidly. He glanced around smiling at the worker behind the counter. Pulling out some notes from his pocket he paid for a few hours, after the formalities were done he tried not to look to eager stepping into the hallway of booths. Each one had its own private door. Hide had worried about how to find Kaneki here, but the thought melted away when he spotted a familiar form standing in front of the coffee machine. His hair was unkempt, shoulders perhaps slightly border than they had been, but it was still him. Hide’s bag dropped to the floor with a slump, the coffee machine hissed the sound drowning out Hide’s rapidly quickening footsteps. 

“Ken!” He smiled, delighted and leaping up just as Kaneki turned around. Hide’s arms wrapped around his neck and he let out a laugh. Without thinking he planted a huge kiss on Kaneki’s cheek. 

Ken was shocked, hot coffee spilled over the lip of the cup and down his wrist. His cheeks grew red and his mouth fell slightly open. Hide laughed again seeing Ken’s expression then covered his mouth and blinked as he realised what he’d just done. 

“Oh sor…”

“Don’t apologize.” Ken said, hiding his face and picking up some napkins to wipe away the spilled coffee. He reached out and grabbed Hide’s hand, still hiding his expression under an overgrown fringe. “This way,” he spoke quietly, tugging Hide along to his booth and scooping up his bag on the way. 

Kaneki didn’t seem to notice how heavy it was, he picked it up like it was full of feathers and walked on. They only took a few steps before they got the the booth but this was enough time for Hide to notice the change that had began to take over Kaneki, not only was he stronger and his shoulders wider but he strode rather than walked. His footfalls were quiet and he carried himself with potency. His head was still bent low, the signs of anxiety seeping thought the cracks of his guise. Hide smiled despite everything, Ken was still Ken. 

They squeezed in together, the booth was smaller than a single bed so their legs ended up overlapping and Hide found Ken’s head on his shoulder. “Its okay,” Ken closed his eyes and kept hold of Hide’s hand. Blowing steam from the top of his cup before taking a sip. “I don’t mind.” Hide planted a soft kiss in Kens hair and the two of them just folded up together, letting anime episodes play quietly on the screen in front of them. Colourful flashes of light flickering over their faces as each animated fight scene went by.

Kaneki felt a drop plink down onto his nose. He looked up to see Hide, eyes full of tears, letting out a low sob and hiccupping, “This shows not that sad…” Kaneki said softly.

“I thought you... I was so worried.” Hide squeezed Ken close and tried to hide the shaking of his shoulders. Thease feelings were something he was used to hiding, tucking away and ignoring. Only, right now, he was just so glad to see Kaneki that they all overflowed in his heart and he couldn’t seem to hold them back any longer.

“Its okay, I’m okay.” Ken brushed his chin on the way up to stroke the side of Hides cheek, pushing himself up slightly he let their lips brush against one another before leaning into the kiss. Hide felt warmth spread from his head to his toes. Lifting Ken onto his lap, He wrapped his hands under his shirt and around his waist. Feeling the newly toned muscles that had formed there, his fingers traced Ken’s shoulder blades and then moved back down. 

Ken winced, “Not, Ow.” Hide quickly drew his hands out and lifted Ken’s shirt. “Hey Hide don’t,”

“You told me you were okay,” Hide dropped Ken’s shirt as soon as he was asked too, but he had still caught a glimpse of the red marks bruising his ribs and the half healed scratches littering his skin like cracked ice. “Ken, those look painful.”

“No, its fine.” Ken tapped his chin

“Kaneki, are you eating okay?” 

“Yeah, I mean, sort of.” Ken’s habit gave him away again. 

“Please.” Hide placed his head forward, listening to the heartbeat slowly pulse under his ear. Kaneki let out a small sigh, taking off his eye patch and tucking into the pocket of his jeans. 

“Hide, I got into a fight. I meant just to get information to trade back to the CCG, I was hoping they’d listen and we could somehow find a way though this. But… I was in way over my head, I still am. Hide I don’t know what I’m supposed to do next.” Kaneki covered his face with his hands, both his ghoul eye and his human one shone with the same tears. “I want to help, I have to but I just can’t think everything’s crumbling and nowhere is safe.” 

“Ken, Ken, ‘Neki listen.” Hide fished his phone from his pocket, which was quite a feat considering Kaneki was sitting on him, and opened up the gallery. “Look, I made a folder and everything.” 

Ken wiped his face and looked down, “What are they?”

“Letters, from some of the people you saved. Also, here some channels say what you did changes everything we know about ghouls.” Hide let Ken take the phone and flick over the images he’d collected. “One of the officers, Akira Mado-san, she said don’t collect the masks. If you tell the CCG what masks the ghouls wear they know who to go after.” 

“Mado?” Ken shivered.

“Yeah, she wants to know why you let the Rabbit go too.”

Ken shifted uneasily at that. “He was trying to kill a child. Rabbit was protecting her. Although I don’t think that will be a good enough answer to satisfy his remaining family members.”

Hide shrugged, “Yeah, probably not. Amon-san seems kinda ticked off with you, and that’s putting it lightly.” Ken didn’t respond for a while. Wheels seemed to spin inside his mind ticking over every idea and pathway he could think of. “Ken?” Hide tried to speak gently but it was clear he had just derailed Kaneki’s train of thought. “My legs are falling asleep… could you…?”

“Oh, sorry.” Kaneki shuffled to one side. 

“Here,” opening his bag Hide pulled out books, clothes, money and a toothbrush, plus an extra backpack that he had rolled up and stuffed into the bottom. “For you, I wanted to ask, I wanted to ask back then and now Kaneki, will you date me?”

“You…” Ken shifted though the items from Hide’s bag, “You brought me all my favourites, even the ones I left behind at the prison.” Ken lifted hardbacks and started making a pile on his lap. He flicked one open running his fingers down the paper with a smile Hide hadn’t seen for a while, the expression of finding a good story to get lost with. All Hide wanted was to leap into those pages after him, to have him sit for hours and explain the latest plot he had explored. The characters he’d seen arc over time and grow. Kaneki pulled the book up to nose. “Yes.” 

“Mm? Yes to what?” Hide asked.

“Yes I’ll go out with you.” 

Hide couldn’t help himself, he darted forward and put his hands around Ken, lifting him up at the arms and almost throwing him into the air. They toppled backwards the door popping open, Hide ended upon his back, legs in the booth and torso laying flat on the carpet. Ken on top of him, again. Hide burst out laughing and this time Kaneki joined in. One of the attendees had heard the commotion and came around the corner, their startled face only make the two boys laugh harder. Chuckling they pack up their things, thanked rather sour looking employee at the desk, and left. Luckily no one had spotted Ken’s red eye.

Outside the clouds had mottled back to a light grey and cars flashed past, splashing fresh puddles from the road. “What do I do next?” Ken asked, holding Hide’s hand in his, their fingers intertwining with warmth. 

“That’s easy.” Hide grinned, his smile a ray of hope and warmth. 

“Tell me.” Ken couldn’t help but smile back, watching Hide as he gazed up at the passing clouds. 

“Lets go home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo, how about a Smut chapter after this one? I will post it separately so its up to you if you want to read it or not. There won't be any plot relevant information in the smut.   
> Should I? What do you think?


	17. Companion

The pair walked through the streets of Tokyo, lamps and neon signs lighting the way through the city. They’d stopped for a few hours at the cinema for what Hide called ‘some normality please.’ Kaneki had enjoyed the film, they’d had to watch the 2D version because of Ken’s eye-patch, but Hide didn’t mind. 

“So,” Hide was going over the plot with many extravagant hand gestures drawing out each point in the air. “When the big guy clicks his fingers hand half the world gets dusted, right, if you had a kidney transplant and your donor vanished, would your kidney go too? Or if you vanished would their kidney just, like, drop to the ground?”

“No Hide, their clothes vanished too so I don’t think that would happen.” Kaneki couldn’t help but smile, Hide was far more into the story than Ken. Although, if there was a book version he’d probably read it, even if modern Sci-fi wasn’t something he read very often. “Should we really be going to my place?” Kaneki asked nervously. He had his hood up and his usual disguise of an eye patch and medical mask, not that they would help much, most of the CCG was familiar with Hide by now and after the incident at the Gourmet’s place every Dove had been informed not to kill the small one eyed ghoul wondering about. Hide said that many of them disagreed with the decision, but as Arima had made the order they followed begrudgingly.

“Yeah, I may have, hmmm, had some of my stuff moved there.” Hide looked a little sheepish. “Your rent was due, and well, they did think you were dead. So I said I’d take the place and got a discount for cleaning it out.”

“Cleaning it out?” 

“Don’t pull that face, you know I’d never throw away your books. Everything is still where it was, plus I’ve been keeping some of my things there. I’m going to have to stop soon though, my pay check only goes so far.” Hide brushed a hand though his hair, mostly because his fringe was in his eyes, but also because he liked the way it made Ken blush.

“You could just stay.” Ken murmured, staring at the ground and shoving his free hand into his pocket. Their footsteps crunched down on the autumn leaves that had decorated Tokyo’s pathways in folds of yellow and orange. 

“What about my place?” Hide asked

“I can make room for the rest of your things, I’m sure I could…” as they approached Ken’s street his words faded. He squeezed Hide’s hand a little too sharply.

“Oww, Ken those are my stitches.” Hide winced, “Ken?” 

Kaneki was frozen to the spot, he seemed to be having trouble breathing. He hunched slightly and pulled down his medical mask. “Last time…. I was here…I… everything.” Letting go of Hide’s hand he wrapped himself up and shuddered, rasping with each breath. Hide laid an arm over his shoulder and rubbed his back.

“I’m here, I’m here. We can take as long as you need. All your books are there Ken, we can have a coffee and you can read. You can even sit outside until you feel ready.” Hide very slowly led Ken forward, waving the few passers by along by telling them his friend had a bad case of food poisoning. “Ken, do you want to go somewhere else?” He waned to check the half-healed slash on Ken’s side as soon as he could, but not if that meant hurting his mind any more than the past events already had done.

Kaneki held a hand around his neck, “No, I can keep going. Just stay close.” Hide nodded and took ‘stay close’ very seriously, wrapping his arms around Kaneki and holding him tenderly. “Hide, I was so lonely without you.” Kaneki rasped, coughing “I’ll go to the door, then take a break.” 

“I’m proud of you Ken.” Hide nuzzled close and bit back his own worries. His phone buzzed, Hide scooped it out from his jeans to check the screen. An unknown number, he considered ignoring it, but he had an inkling of who it could be and so pushed the device to his ear. Holding it up with a hunched shoulder so that he could keep both arms around Ken.

“Hideyoshi-kun? This is the CCG, we have some important news for you.”

Of course it was them, who else? “Yes, I’m here, do you need me to come in?”

There was a fumble as his question was passed on, “No, its just a short message, I’ll hand you over to Mado-san.” The phone was passed on. Ken, who could just about hear the voice, turned pale when Mado was mentioned. 

“Kaneki is being allowed to continue, as long as no more CCG or citizens come to harm due to his actions. We understand what he is eating and demand he come in immediately if any side effects occur.” Mado Akira was blunt and to the point. “Pass it along would you?”

“Sure, but how do I…?”

“Don’t bother with that Hideyoshi, we know you paid for his flat...Kaneki?” Ken gave a slight cough and Akira’s sly smile could some how be heard in her tone, “Takizawa! You owe me 2000 Yen!” There was a groan from somewhere behind Akira. “Hideyoshi, be careful out there.” She hung up before any reply could be spoken.

“Well, I guess you’re somewhat in the clear. Want to tell me what she meant by side effects?” Hide and Ken had just entered the courtyard. Kaneki was looking upwards, shocked and shaking. Hide’s eyes followed his gaze upwards, a figure was leaning against the railing high up and opposite Ken’s front door. “We should leave.” Hide whispered, pulling his hood up in a hope the mystery figure hadn’t spotted his face.

Kaneki sniffed, “No, its fine.” He took a few steps away from Hide and stood up right. Hide blinked, it was like Kaneki had switched something off. His fists still shook and feet still shuffled, but he had a courage that began to burn brighter with each step he took. 

They climbed the steps, their footsteps a metal metronome that steadily counted each movement forward. Kaneki had let go of Hide’s hand and climbed slightly ahead. Hide, despite his worry, couldn’t help but notice how fine the view was from here, and he wasn’t talking about the apartments courtyard below. Shaking the thought away he pulled his eyes back down to his trainers. Once they reached the top Ken paused, holding an arm out protectively in front of Hide. Who peaked over to see who was awaiting them.

“Arima-san.” Kaneki kept his eyes focused on the white case that Arima kept close by his side.

“Jason. He’s the ghoul you should go after next. Join Aogiri Tree if you have to.” He threw something in a high arch towards them. Kaneki caught it, which made Hide feel a slight distance in his chest. The Ken he remembered wasn’t that agile and never had such a cold expression on his face. Arima continued, “Keep it on, we need your position at all times.” He strode towards them, around and down the steps. Pausing to glance back up at Kaneki for a second, just a second, as if something secret had passed between them. Something Hide felt completely isolated from. 

Inside Kaneki’s apartment Hide scooped up the abandoned post piled next to the door as Ken began to make coffee. “Hey, this one looks important.” Hide slid it over the kitchen counter, still mildly annoyed that he couldn’t understand everything inside Ken’s head anymore. Then again, he gazed up at where a rope once hung, had he really ever understood Ken?

“Hide, its, um well, a salary.” Kaneki smoothed the paper down on the side, “The CCG say if I need anything to help me find groups of ghouls I can use an allocated grant.” 

Hide flicked his eyes over the paper, “Yo, that’s a lot of digits.” 

“Here, they even say they have allocated me a place to stay. I’m far more likely to be recognised here after all.” Kaneki stirred his coffee and handed another over to Hide.

“Thanks, Wow, that’s really really something Ken. Just be careful, okay?” He raised the mug to his lips then withdrew at and gazed onwards. “Ken?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re drinking coffee.” Hide nodded, a few spare puzzle pieces slotting into place.

“Turns out it’s the only normal thing ghouls can digest, well other than water.” Kaneki smiled and sipped the coffee, its aroma filled the room. He closed his eyes to take a deep breath. Letting the hot liquid burn his mouth slightly before swallowing and feeling his taste buds slowly heal over. When he opened his eyes, Hide had choked up, his eyes full of tears one blink away from spilling over. “Hide, what’s wrong?”

“I…I’m just so afraid for you.” Hide pushed his coffee back on the side and pulled his sleeves over his hands, wiping his face with his cuffs. 

“Hide…” not knowing what else to do, Ken just reached out and held Him in his arms. That’s what had Hide do for him, more times than he could remember.

“Ken, I’m joining the CCG cadet units. I’m not letting you do this alone.” Hide gripped Ken’s back, he knew he was human, he knew that right now Kaneki was far stronger than he could ever hope to be. Leaning back, he let go. Walked away and opened the bathroom door to take out the first aid kit. Kaneki went back to gazing out the window.

“Please don’t. Hide I’d have no idea what to do if you got hurt.” 

“And I feel the same way Ken. Come here, lets tidy up that wound.” Hide sat on the bed and patted the covers beside him, unzipping the green pouch to fish out gauze and scissors. Under his feet his blood still stained the floorboards from that day a few months ago. 

Kaneki didn’t move, he tried to speak but sounded quiet and choked. “Hide I …I can’t move.”

“Ken?” Hide walked over and laid an arm over his shoulder’s. “Talk to me.”

“Last time I was here…” Kaneki put a hand over his neck, he was shaking slightly, unable to turn around and face his own apartment. 

Hide glanced over the letter from the CCG, “Then let’s go.” He began gathering things from Ken’s flat, shoving them all into a duffle bag he’d pulled out from under Ken’s bed. “The letter says the Key is in a lockbox outside the property. The code is there too, so we can go right now.”

“Hide.”

“I’ll call a taxi, just relax, get some fresh air.” He zipped up Kens coat and pulled his hood up around his ears. “There, no one will recognize you now.” Ken thought that Hide’s smile was a more valuable treasured than all of his books put together, not that he would ever admit it. That single instant seemed like an opportunity he couldn’t let himself miss out on. Ken leaned forward, wrapping his arms around Hide’s waist and pulling him boldly into a deep kiss. Ken’s fluffy hood tickled Hides cheeks, his arms pulled him ever closer until their chests created a pressure between them strong enough to feel one another’s heartbeat rhythmically thump in unison. Hide slid his hands over Kens back, leaning in and savouring a moment he thought would never come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Working on this, and some others, and my own and my essay and comic and I would like to sleep sometime soon. 
> 
> Question is am I going to be nice and let Hide and Ken live together? \O-O/


	18. Assignment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will write more soon, but I fell off my skateboard and can't bend my leg so have to go to a doctor to get it looked at :(   
> Working on some smut and sketches so hopefully I can make the wait worth it. Sorry

Ken woke early that morning, Hide was sprawled over the sheets and softly snoring. Kaneki couldn’t help but smile, he reached out but then thought better of it and withdrew his hand, not wanting to wake him up after such a long night. Quietly, he slipped on a shirt from one of the many boxes he had yet to unpack fully. Ken headed to the kitchen, his new phone had two messages both from unknown numbers.

‘Eat and leave, Aogiri spotted in 4th ward. Member’s have dark red cloaks with symbols their back.’ A fuzzy enclosed photo shows Ken what to look for.

The second text read, 

‘Delete all messages after they are understood. Keep on power saving mode with GPS on, if GPS stops we will send officers to your last known location.’ 

An order and a subtle threat, this was his job now. Ken deleted the messages, pocketing the phone in his jeans, they were new and still stiff but comfy enough. Being given all of this just for taking down a few ghouls. Being a spy, or mole, was quite a dangerous job after all. If any ghouls ever discovered he was working for the CCG, well, he only had to remember the cannibals licking flesh from fresh rib bones and shivers ran down his neck. Then again, he’d done it too. Karen’s last expression flashed in his mind, the Gourmet too. He hadn’t made as much of a mess with Shuu, but he had still removed the ghouls Kagune sack and devoured it, the organ had been juicy, like biting into a blood orange. Only it was rotten and bitter to the core. He bit his lip, trying not to think about it was impossible, over and over he tried to convince himself that he’d had no choice. But there was always a slither of doubt left behind to strangle his thoughts. He hadn’t told Hide about those two, he knew already Ken was sure, but still. The news hadn’t mentioned too much detail as to the cannibalistic acts he’d committed, but he still remembered them. What it felt like to loose to the hunger. Ken’s stomach gurgled, in the back of his mind the Gourmet scoffed and Rize giggled. 

Opening the fridge Ken saw boxes of mushed up meat in Tupperware boxes, each one labelled neatly some with ‘Ghoul’ and others with ‘Human’. He closed the fridge, the Gourmet seemed to be trying to tell him something, ‘They expect you to eat that? Awful, Saleté.’ Ken roughly pushed his elbow into his side, aggressively putting pressure on the bandages Hide had applied last night. The wound stung and the voice faded away. 

Kaneki was well aware of how badly he was treating himself, not eating knowing that he’d be weak, ignoring Rize rather than confronting her. This is my mind, my Kagune, myself. You can’t take it, you can’t. He made himself a coffee, wrapped Hide snugly in the blankets and headed out. November had arrived and the air had a slight chill to it. Time for work, Kaneki took a deep breath, he’d left Hide a note that said he’d be back later. He knew there was no guarantee of that, this wasn’t a nine till five kind of job, all he could do was try. He wanted to come home. This place wasn’t quite ‘home’ yet, but Hide was here, so it was enough.

“I’ll come back.” Kaneki tapped his chin, lying to himself without really knowing it. If he did this right, he could show everyone that there were ghouls out there who didn’t deserve to die. Hinami, Touka everyone at the café, they could live without hiding. Only if he got this right. The heavy responsibility stuck like a stone in Ken’s gut, but it was worth it, everyone would be safe. Everyone. 

\--  
Hide woke up a few hours later, the ceiling blurred though the sleep in his eyes. He reached out an arm feeling the smooth covers. It took him a little bit of time to realize where he was, sitting up he remembered, this was Ken’s new place. Yet Ken didn’t seem to be here.

“Kaneki?” He called out, slipping out of the double bed and opening a few doors on the landing. “Ken?” He took the steps downstairs barefoot, the kitchen tiles cold on his toes. Kaneki was gone. The only thing out of place was a note, ‘back soon’, nothing else. Hide scratched the back of his head, biting his lip and cursing himself for not foreseeing this. Going back upstairs he rummaged through Ken’s new wardrobe until he found something that fit him, his own clothes were in dire need of a wash. There was nothing here he could eat so he took the spare key from hits hook by the door and headed out. “Ken, why can’t you just trust me.” 

“Who’s there?” A figure stood in front of the door, as tall as the frame and carrying a huge cardboard box. Another person slipped under the giant’s arm and skipped inside. 

“Yo! We brought snacks!”

“Juuzo, take your shoes off and be polite.” Shinohara smiled apologetically and Hide stepped back to let him inside. 

“WaaHaa! Such a nice place, Ooooo” Juuzo was spinning around in the living room, admiring everything and poking about in all the cupboards and draws. 

“Hideyoshi-kun, pardon the intrusion. We heard you where here and that Ken has his orders, so we’ve brought you some food.” Shinohara placed the box on the table with a huff and smiled back. “I also pulled some strings, got you a spot with this year’s trainees.” 

“Thank you Sir! I’ll do my best!” Hide bowed low, knowing that he was asking for a lot here. 

“Are you sure this is want you want. Its been a long time but I still remember your parents.” Shinohara placed a hand on Hide’s shoulder, “Your current fathers, are they on board with this too?”

“I’m over eighteen…” Hide couldn’t look him in the eyes.

“That just means you don’t have to tell them, not that you shouldn’t.” Shinohara sighed, “In time, you should let them know.” 

Hide nodded, Juuzo was kneeling on the sofa and leaning over one of the arms. “I wonder if I have dads, Hey Shinohara-san, who’s my daddy?” 

“Ah…” Shinohara let out an awkward laugh, “We don’t know Juuzo, and please don’t say it that way. Why don’t we help unpack?” 

“’Kayyyy,” Juuzo flipped over the sofa and strode back to the door playing with the stitches that criss-crossed over their lips. 

“There are quite a few heavy ones, we went to Kaneki-kun’s old place this morning and packed up everything there. The CCG will also refund you for paying his rent. Arima said it was time. That man really seems to know a lot and yet lets on so very little.” Shinohara paused, considering his next words. “Hideyoshi-kun, there is talk about creating a new squad, its early days yet, nothing has been set in stone. Just talk. But, if the events that caused Kaneki-kun to be the way he is now could be replicated, well as I said, early days.”

Hide hefted up a box, “What happened to Ken, I wouldn’t want that for anyone.” 

“I agree with you, yet I also understand the reason Kaneki-kun isn’t with you, or rather, he didn’t take you with him. Because you are human.” Shinohara slid another box onto the growing pile. “I’ve said too much already… Juuzo! Don’t carry them like that you’ll break something.”

“’Kayyy!” Juuzo hollered removing the box from his head and plonking it down onto the coffee table. 

It took a little while to haul the many boxes back and forth from the van outside into the house. After they had been stacked neatly around the living room Hide offered the two inspectors some tea. Whilst filling up the kettle he noticed the cup in the sink. “Oh, Shinohara-san does the CCG know that ghouls can drink coffee?” 

“That’s fascinating, Kaneki-kun too I presume, I’ll pass it on to the research teams when we get back. Juuzo those aren’t for you.”

“Awww,” pouted Juuzo, putting back the handful of sweet snacks he’d pilfered from one of the boxes labelled ‘food.’ Hide placed three hot cups of steaming tea on the table in the living room and sat down.

“There’s a uniform and timetable upstairs for you, I put the box outside the bedroom. Here,” he pulled out a slim box from his jacket pocket. “This is scorpion, Quinke steel, almost everyone starts of with one of these so you might as well take it. Bring it to your sessions, and be careful its sharp.” 

“Oh Scorpion! I’ve got loads of those!” Juuzo sipped from the teacup and turned in a circle on the swivel chair he was crouching on. “Wanna see how it works?”

“Not in here Juuzo, Juuzo! Put it away, no don’t….” There was a woosh and a distinct thudding noise. Shinohara sighed and got up to inspect the fresh damage to the banister. He twisted the knife and pulled it out. Tossing it back to Juuzo and shaking his head. Hide couldn’t help but let out a small laugh.

“You two must be the strangest pair of doves in the CCG.” He smiled.

“Na! Not stranger than a one-eyed ghoul and a rookie!” Juuzo slipped the knife back under his shirt and pulled down an eye-lid with a creepy smile. “One eye better not die! I want to spar with him!” 

Hide tensed up and Shinohara noticed, “Hey Juuzo, we should be heading off now, let Hideyoshi-kun sort out his things. Oh and before I forget,” he turned to Hide, “we can bring another bed around, there is only one bedroom here but space inside for two singles.”

“No,” Hide felt his cheeks flush pink, “That’s fine.”

“Oh? Oh! No worries then.” Shinohara smiled and placed his cup down on the table. Getting up and calling Juuzo over the the door so that they could drive back to the CCG and start a day’s work. 

Hide waved them off at the door, he closed it and heard the lock click before slumping to the ground. He was coming back. Kaneki wasn’t going to die out there, alone and cold. The image of his silhouette strung up on a rope flashed past Hide’s thoughts. No, he would be okay. He remembered applying a bandage to Ken’s side, noticing how he winced and how he held his chin when he said it didn’t hurt. How he smiled.

Fists tightening Hide shuffled to his feet and headed up stairs, rummaging through boxes and tearing away tape until he found his new uniform. He changed into it, pulling the armour tight and pulling a hoodie over the top as well as some knee length shorts to hide the more obvious parts of his armour. Lastly, he fastened Scorpions sheath to his lower back and slipped the blade inside, hiding it under his hoodie. Kaneki’s location was a mystery, well, the CCG knew but right now there was no way they’d just give Hide such classified information. He might not be able to help right now, but he could train. The amour was designed to be light weight, but he could still feel the straps and pads under his clothes pulling him down. He tightened his shoelaces and decided to go for a run, practicing moving in this suit would help his agility and running could build strength. 

If it could help Kaneki, he’d do anything.

\--

“I smell a ghoul.” A brute of a man in a white suit smiled a practiced smile. At a glance he may have seemed normal, but upon closer inspection he filled the suit a little too well. His chest wide and shoulder’s hard. He slipped on a white hockey mask and cracked his finger knuckle with his thick thumb in a peculiar yet distinctive way. “A new ghoul.” Under the mask he grinned a teeth revealing smile and breathed in a long sniff of air.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one took sometime,  
> I moved house and will be moving again soon as this place is just temporary.  
> I also got really sick  
> (Think like TG V.01 chapter two page 18-ish, thats how sick I have been)  
> I also have a tumblr now, though I don't use it much, feel free to share anything HideKane with me or just send me a message if you want too :)  
> https://pillowfortsandicecream.tumblr.com
> 
> Also thanks for 123 Kudos! :O


	19. Alarm

Five days had passed since Ken left his new home and the CCG were being incredibly secretive about his new assignments. Even Hide, no matter how hard he tried, could barely find any information relevant to Ken. He was just out there, somewhere, refusing to ask for help like he always did. Trying to do everything on his own. 

Smack, Hide’s arm stung and he was pushed a few steps to one side. “Focus Hideyoshi-kun! If I were a ghoul that could have cut you in half!” Takizawa joked, “No daydreaming, ‘kay?” 

“My bad. Let’s start over.” Hide shook his head to clear his thoughts and lowered himself into the stance Amon had taught him. Balancing this and University had been hard, he’d given up his after class activities and barely saw his classmates socially any more, but it would be worth it. At least, that’s what he told himself when he flopped down exhausted every night and when he woke up each morning with every muscle aching. Takizawa swung his Quinke, a crossbow shaped Ukaku named Douhi, forward in a sharp jab. Hide ducked and leapt down trying to scratch Takizawa’s chest plate, but missing as the investigator jumped back and smacked Hide’s arm down. Pointing his Qunike right between Hide’s eyes.

“Bang.” He said before pulling Hide to his feet. “Lets go again another time, you look like you could do with some sleep.”

“No, I’m fine, ten more minutes.”

“Hideyoshi-Kun, I saw you this morning. Juuzo teaching you to throw knifes, asking Amon for tips building muscle and with Akira. You’re getting good at avoiding that whip of hers, but you need some sleep. I know you’d be a lot better at defending if you were less tired.”

Hide’s shoulders slumped, he knew he couldn’t win this fight, after all, Takizawa was right. He was barely able to keep his eyes open. “Okay, okay.” Hide slipped Scorpion back into its scabbard and rubbed sweat from his forehead. “Any news on Kaneki?” He asked hopefully.

“You know I can’t tell you that, even if I knew.” Takizawa shrugged, “Sorry, I’ve got some paperwork to follow up on, see you next time Hide-kun. Higher ups are keeping that all under wraps, I’m not even sure if Amon-san knows the details.”

Hide nodded, noticing the change in formality Takizawa had used. He began to unbuckle his CCG uniform and headed towards to lockers. This area was used for training officers, gyms, equipment, showers and more were all on these few floors. Although, as there were other facilities dotted around Tokyo, it wasn’t ever that busy.

“Oh, Hide-kun.” Takizawa called into the changing room door, “I’m probably not supposed to say this, but I do know his codename. The ghouls use it too so there’s no way it will say secret for long.” Takizawa paused and Hide heard a shuffling as if he was checking that the coast was clear, “Eyepatch.”  
“Thanks.” Hide responded thinking that he could have guessed that on his own, yet thankful all the same. Takizawa was kind, but had a habit of spilling to much information at times. Hide felt a little guilty as using Takizawa chattiness to his advantage, then again, it wasn’t like he forced anything from him. 

On his way out from the building Hide felt dizzy. Recently dreams of Ken had been plaguing him a night. Causing him to wake up sweating or in a state of panic, he’d hardly ever dealt with this kind of constant worry before, so wasn’t sure how to process it. Time didn’t pass like it should, He would get home, get changed and suddenly it would be 4am, then he’d blink and it would be 4.30am. Other times he’d lay awake for what felt like hours only to see the clock had moved on just five minutes. If he slept ten ours or two, he still felt groggy and restless. Ken’s hanging shadow haunting his dreams, the cuts on Ken’s side slicing him into pieces. Tonight was no different. 

Hide woke with a gasp of cold air. The dream had started off well, Ken had been laying next to him, sleeping silently. So quietly that Hide had grown worried and checked his pulse. But before he could reach over Ken had grabbed his hand and bitten down on his fingers. Climbing on top so he couldn’t get away and pinning him down. His open mouth leaking bloody drool, Hide was frozen. His dream causing sweat to dampen his sheets. The imaginary Kaneki bent down and licked his chest with a tongue so sharp it left red stinging slits where ever it ran. A noose around his neck so tight it pulled off skin each time he moved. “Ken, please, Ken…” In the dream Hide’s voice was weak. Kaneki hissed quietly and scratched across Hide’s stomach, reaching in with a squelch to pull out strings of sticky flesh that slopped over him and soaked the room in red. Ken’s nails came forward, they lifted a bundle of hot meat and bit down with a sickening squish. He smiled, blood seeping out from his closed teeth, gurgling, the blood mixed with tears and Hide felt them plink down onto his face.

His eyes opened, the dream ended, no nightmare Ken, no noose. And Hide’s guts felt like they were all in their proper places, that is, safely inside his body. The tears remained, only they weren’t Ken’s. Hide wiped his face on his blankets and scoffed, “I haven’t cried from a dream since I was ten, get a hold of yourself Hide.” He muttered, pinching his cheek to check he was awake. 

Falling back onto the bed Hide closed his eyes, only something wasn’t right, some part of the dream seemed to remain. Crunch. Hide sat up sharply and froze, listening out into the darkness. He didn’t dare turn on the bedside light just yet. Snap. Downstairs, the noise was downstairs. Hide slipped out of bed as quietly as he could and picked up Scorpion from its box on the dresser. He left the sheath on the bed and headed downstairs, using a method of   
sneaking about the CCG had shown him in order to make as least noise as possible. Moving slowly towards the grinding wet sounds Hide made his way down one stair at a time, sticking to the wall where the stairs were more secure and therefore less likely to squeak. The CCG hadn’t taught him that trick, Kaneki had. He’d read it in some book and must have told Hide back in high school. Hide paused to clear his mind, whatever was downstairs, he’d have no chance if he was so distracted by such nostalgic thoughts. 

The kitchen light was on, Hide slowed down and bent lower to peak through the banisters. Someone was there, sitting at the kitchen table and making an awful mess. Empty tupperware boxes strewn around the floor and drips of something dark streaked down the kitchen countertops. Was that Ken? The shadow, the size, it looked like Ken. Hide couldn’t be sure, back at the café he’d been so easy to recognise, but right now the remains of Hide’s dream kept flashing though his thoughts, preventing him from moving forward. Besides, this ghoul had a Kagune that spread from his shoulder and wove around his arm, over his neck and down his spine like half crafted armour. He had the tentacles like Ken, four of them spread out from his lower back, only unlike Ken these were spiked. Rippling with prickles, barded and wickedly sharp. 

Hide swallowed and the ghoul jolted up, sniffing the air. Placing a hand on the bannister Hide focused, gripping Scorpion tighter in his uncontrollably sweaty hands. The ghoul began to turn around. As Hide leapt, placing a foot on the banister and jumping up in order to maintain the element of surprise. Something that came up regularly in his CCG classes. Scorpion shrieked as it collided mid-air with a row of thorns. The Ghoul side-stepped and quickly retracted their Kagune. Falling to their knees and covering their face with their hands. Hide realised his mistake before he’d even landed. Ken. How stupid, how utterly stupid, if it was any other ghoul then the door would have been broken open. Hide landed on the sofa and tried to steady himself but ended up rolling forward and tumbling hard onto the wooden coffee table. Feeling the edge slam firmly into his temple.

“Ow.” He winced, letting scorpion fall from his fist and dragging himself to his feet, his back clamped up in pain and he had to lean on the sofa for support. 

“Don’t.” Mumbled Ken, his words obscured and face hidden. “I just came to eat, I’m going now.”

“Ken!” Hide cried, “I’m sorry I didn’t recognize you, I’m sorry I’m so, so sorry.” He tried to stand, tried to stumble forward. But his brain was spinning, his eyes kept becoming unfocused and his gaze kept slipping into darkness. Kaneki looked up, revealing his mask. A leather eye-patch, bolts on his neck catching the light and a zipped bloody mouth filled with teeth that looked uncannily like the smile from Hide’s monstrous dream. 

Kaneki was saying somthing, he was reaching forward. Moving in flashes like he was under a strobe light. Hide felt the floor slap him in the face and closed his eyes, deciding that this too, had to be just another dream. 

\--

Something soothed Hide’s back, he could feel it cooling his sore muscles and untwisting the many knots tied there. His skull felt fractured, as if moving even an inch would cause his head to cave in on itself like a broken Easter egg. 

“Hide? Don’t move, you probably have a concussion.” Ken’s voice. “I’m sorry, I only meant to get some food and go, I didn’t want to drag you into this.”

“I’m involved Ken, I’m dragging myself into this if you like it or not. I’m gonna stick to you like glue.” Hide kept his eyes closed, feeling as if his words were not leaving his mouth the way he intended them too. They mixed up and jumbled over one another, which was just like how his brain felt. “I love you Ken and I’m going to stick by you. Fuck, I’ll never let go. Fuck, my head hurts. Fuck me Kaneki you bloody moron.” 

Ken smiled, “So, you love me? Or I’m a moron? Because earlier you tired to stab me.”

“Both.” Hide said after considering it for a moment. “And that was an accident.” 

“Okay, you accidently tried to stab me.” Ken bit his lip, “I should get you to a hospital Hide, you smacked your head pretty hard and have been sleeping the past twelve hours.”

“Confused people are supposed to stay awake.” Hide groaned, trying to move and feeling the sharp pang of a fresh bruise over his face. 

“Concussed, not confused. And yes, but you were already unconscious and I’ve never seen you with such bags under your eyes.” Kaneki leaned forward and placed something cold on Hide’s face. “You needed the sleep”

“What’s that?” Hide grunted. 

“Frozen peas.” Ken responded flatly and though the eyelashes of one squinting eye Hide noticed tear tracks that ran in painted lines down Ken’s face.

“Aha. You cried from laughing at me after I smashed my melon in.” Hide snorted, appreciating the cold icy feeling that soothed his swollen cheek bone.

“No.” Huffed Kaneki, “You tired to stab me.” He sniffed and drew his feet up on his chair, hugging his knees and hiding his face. “With a qunike.” Kaneki shuddered and gripped his shoulder, muttering into his knees. Hide felt the cold slowly slot his thoughts back into place, he reached up and held the make-shift ice patch to his temple, supporting it there as he pushed himself up. 

“’Neki, I was just scared, I didn’t recognize your Kagune and you had a mask on. I’m really sorry.” Guilt whelmed up in Hide’s chest, after everything, he shouldn’t have been the one Ken had to protect himself from. He was supposed to be the one protecting him, or training to anyway. Kaneki sniffed, something cracked and Hide winced again before realising it wasn’t him. “Ken? What are you doing?” Kaneki only shook his head in response, blood trickled from the side of the chair, over his bare toes and onto the floor. “Ken, you’re hurt, let me see.” Hide didn’t feel like his legs would support him, so he moved his pillow to the end of the bed, next to Ken’s seat, and crawled on to it. Reaching out to smooth down Ken’s wild hair. “Looks like you could use a shower, come on Ken, show me. We can share the icy peas.” 

Kaneki swallowed, not lifting his head he held out his arm. Hide took it and shook out a pillow imminently so that he could use its case to wrap up Ken’s wrist. His head pulsed but he didn’t stop until the wound was covered tightly. “How did that happen? Did you eat enough? Shouldn’t it heal faster because you ate?” Hide winced and supported his head on one hand, clutching the cold plastic bag to his injury as he felt his brain beginning to slide around in dizzying circles again. 

Kaneki tentatively let his toes brush the ground, he walked slowly around and then proceeded to shuffle under the blankets until he was leaning with his back up against Hide. Who lay down and wrapped and arm over him, feeling his heart beat under his palm. “It’s healed up already.” Kaneki unknotted the fabric and showed Hide his red arm, wiping away the blood to reveal the undamaged skin underneath. 

“Alright,” Hide leaned closer, pressing his chest on Kaneki’s back. “I’m sorry about last night. I promise never to accidently try and stab you again.” 

Kaneki nodded, “I promise to use the doorbell next time.” He mumbled guiltily.

“And use a plate. Or at least a fork.” Hide added with a slight laugh.

“Only if you promise not to jump over the banister and smack your head again.” Ken seemed to cheer up a little, he even smiled.

“Alright, no furniture leapfrog I get it.” Hide chuckled, burying himself in Ken’s dirty hair. “How about a little warning that you’re coming back next time huh?” 

Kaneki turned his head and grinned, “I’ll try, as long as you promise to get some sleep each night.” 

Hide spotted the blood between Ken’s teeth, fresh and still red, to vivid to be from his food last night. “Ken. I’ll make you a hundred promises, as long as you try to keep just this one.” 

“What?” Kaneki asked, his smile falling into a worried expression. 

Stroking the skin on his cheek and pulling him close into a warm safe hug Hide closed his eyes tight to hold back his tears of concern. “Try not to bite yourself, not on the arms or anywhere. Please.” Kaneki turned away and didn’t respond, he seemed almost ashamed that Hide had noticed. He curled up tighter and mumbled an apology. “You don’t have to apologize Ken, please just, you can count on me. I’m here, right here.” Hide had no idea how to help, not a single idea went though his mind that didn’t seem naïve or useless. A half-ghoul Ken he could support, a lonely Ken he was used to, but this? This was new and terrifying, incomprehensible and unpredictable Ken. He had no idea what he was supposed to. Even so, Hide had already made up his mind to try everything he could to support Kaneki till the end. 

“Hide?”

“Yeah?” 

“Take the day off from the CCG tomorrow.” 

“Sure thing. You too, alright?” Hide nodded, his nightmare fading fast as reality became far more worrisome. 

“Alright.” Ken breathed out deeply, anything more he had to say fading as he fell asleep in Hide’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its been awhile, hurt my leg, got ill and living in an attic like a smol wifi eating goblin.   
> Enjoy the cowboy bebop and Artemis fowl references.   
> Stay safe my Crew! (because we are all on the same ship)


	20. Home

They woke up in the same positions they had fallen asleep in, not even a few minutes after one another. “You want pancakes?” Hide asked, rubbing sleep from his eyes and stretching his words out with a yawn.

“Um?” Ken tapped his cheek, his eye was back to being its normal silvery grey but the gesture was clear enough.

“Its fine, I’ll just squish some of your stuff down flat and you can pour coffee on it instead of syrup.” Hide gave Ken a squeeze, unable to hide how happy he was to wake up next to Kaneki. 

“That’s disgusting. Let's just have coffee.” Ken turned over and faced him, planting a light kiss on Hide’s lips. Who blushed and ran his hand up Ken’s spine, pulling him forward into another, deeper kiss. “Hide,” Ken said between kisses, “I really need – a shower and – coffee.” Hide just smiled, rolling over and planting more kisses down Ken’s neck, who flushed in response, eye-lids fluttering as Hide began to pull on his shirt and kiss further down his chest. “Please- Hide, Ah, you’ll get sick.” Ken bit his lip, “I haven’t showered yet.” 

“Ahh, fine.” Hide flopped back onto the soft mattress, “Come back when you taste like soap.” He smiled, glad to have Ken back with him once again, he’d slept better beside Kaneki that he ever had on his own. 

Getting changed and washing his face over the Kitchen sink, Hide began to tidy up after last night. Kaneki’s open food containers were all over the place and some of them still had spots of dried blood inside. After dumping them all into hot soapy water Hide made a mental note to himself to by his own storage boxes, and maybe a smaller fridge. Just in case any of his food got mixed up with Ken’s. He opened the fridge to get milk for his coffee and was about to close it when something strange caught his eye. Each of Ken’s boxes were labelled with ‘Ghoul’ or ‘Human’, but right now, there were only human boxes. Hide pulled on a yellow rubber glove and stuck his hand in the sink, rummaging through the water to confirm his uncertainties. As he had suspected, every box in the sink was labelled ‘Ghoul’. Kaneki was refusing to eat human meat. This made Hide slightly proud, but also worried. He’d been trying to find out the side effects of ghouls who continued to commit acts of cannibalism, nothing he had learned was good. 

“What’s wrong?” Kaneki came down the stairs, a towel around his shoulders. Dressed in a soft pair of linen trousers and a t-shirt that was tight around his shoulder’s and waist. Hide gaped, Ken hardly ever wore such tight-fitting shirts, he preferred to bundle up in layers of jumpers and coats.

“You look…”

“Silly, I know. But my stuff needs a good wash and all I could find was CCG provided clothing. For some reason, they seem to think I need twelve sets of the same sportswear.” Kaneki folded his arms over his chest and slouched, self-conscious of his new look. 

“I was going to say amazing, or strong, or ripped. Many other synonyms too, if you like I could list them.” Hide’s mouth remained open. Kaneki just tilted his head to one side before examining his short sleeves and new trousers. 

“It's not ripped, its new.” He said, confused.

Hide just laughed, stepping forward so that he was standing at the bottom of the stairs. Ken elevated on the last step and looking down at him puzzled. “You’ve grown, can I?” He reached out, bushing a finger on Ken’s chest and down to his belly button. The soft fabric warm under his fingers.

Kaneki blushed but didn’t move away, “It's no… Um, you saw this morning. Hide that tickles.”

“Your PJ shirt is baggy, this one shows off your abs. Which look incredibly attractive by the way.” Hide spoke without thinking, realized the words had left his mouth and jumped back. His cheeks red and eyes darting around to stare at anything but Ken’s face. “Anyway, this house is pretty cool huh, I put your books on the shelves but you’ll probably want to rearrange them.” He lifted his arms up and placed his hands behind his head, swiftly turning away and back to the kitchen.

“Hide?” 

“Oh and the CCG sent over this coffee machine, its worth a ridiculous amount and makes the most amazing latte’s.” Hide pointed out various parts of the room, talking constantly in a futile effort to hide his past actions.

“Hide.”

“Oh! And the door has about seven locks on it so you’ll be fine here. Plus, the TV here is massive! I could fall into the midnight channel easily ahaha!” Hide darted over to the living room, Ken pursuing him insistently.

“Hide!” Kaneki grabbed his shoulder’s and whisked him around so that they faced each other. Refection’s black in the TV’s huge screen. “You’ve gotten stronger too you know.” He mumbled, losing confidence now that they were so close. “I don’t mind if you want to see. I wanted to show you something anyway…” 

“Show me?” Hide asked, failing to hide his excitement, “Um, I mean, you can show me anything, Ken. You’re my Boyfriend after all.” Kaneki blushed at that and shuffled to the kitchen to examine the shiny new coffee machine, not focusing at all he turned it on and off several times before actually pouring out a cup of steaming black brew. 

“Okay, sit down and don’t, um, don’t worry. You probably saw last night. But I wanted to be the one to explain.” Ken took a gulp of coffee and moved into the living room, gesturing to the sofa and sitting down on the coffee table. Hide hopped onto the piles of pillows and crossed his legs. Ken took a deep breath, his cup chinking on the glass table as he set it down, he turned around so that his back was facing Hide. Then removed his shirt. 

Hide bit his lip, it was all he could do not to reach forward and hold Kaneki close. His back was a stream of rippled muscle, pale skin stretched over it like canvas in a frame. He could see the smooth skin begin to move, flecks of red flowed outwards like burning scraps of paper in the wind. Those ashes formed four spikes on Kens lower back and one on his shoulder blade, they grew and Ken shuddered as four shining red tentacles emerged, along with a darker, blue-tinged, one over his shoulder. “Does it hurt?” Hide asked, worry causing his breath to catch in a gasp.

“Not really,” Ken murmured and Hide couldn’t quite tell if he’d tapped his chin or not. The tentacles on his lower back flicked out and thorns emerged along the edges. Hide slowly raised a hand, gently feeling the mass of the Kagune which sprouted from Ken’s lower spine. “Soft,” He commented, “I don’t remember them looking like this to begin with, did you evolve?” 

Kaneki let out a short laugh, his Kangue twisting like a wave in response. He turned to face Hide, letting his Kagune gently sway behind him. “Evolve? I’m not a Pokémon Hide.” From this side, Hide could see the Kagune on Ken’s shoulder twisted around his arm. At its base, where the blue connected to his skin, the scales seemed to resemble sharp teeth. As if the Kagune was biting into him. “I, um, I found some other ghouls, the Gourmet and his friend.” Hide stayed quiet, allowing Ken the time he needed to explain. “They had all those people, and I let them out. But Karen was angry that I hurt the Gourmet. They found me, that’s how I got that injury you saw at the café, I didn’t mean to, well maybe I did, I don’t know. I took them, I ate them.” His last sentence was barely audible. 

“Ken, its okay, they tried to kill you, it was self-defence.” Hide reached out and held his hand. 

“Their Kagune, I took them. Now mine looks… restructured.” Kaneki wouldn’t meet Hide’s gaze, He just looked down at their joining hands and bit his lip. 

“Ken, I love you.” Hide leaned forward, kissing away the first tear that rolled from Kaneki’s eye. “I love you.” Ken started crying even more, tears spilling down his chin and dripping onto his lap. “Its okay, I’m here for you.” Hide reached forward, wrapping his arms around Ken’s neck and watching his Kagune seep away, dissolving into shining scales. 

“Hide I, I…I think someone’s at the door.”

“Let's pretend to be out.” Hide grinned like a child playing tricks.

“It’s a CCG member, I can’t ignore them.”

“What? How do you know?” Hide followed Ken to the door, looking very disappointed when Kaneki pulled his shirt back over his head, once again hiding his torso. 

“I can hear footsteps, two people, one shorter and lighter than the other. High heels. One has a neckless, it's tapping against their top shirt button.”

“No way! That’s amazing!” Hide said with an attempted stage whisper. Sure enough, the doorbell let out a loud buzz and Hide’s brain played a fast round of ‘Who's who?’ Just before Kaneki had unclipped the last lock Hide jumped, “I bet its Amon-san and Mado-san!”

He was right, the door opened and Mado strode in. “How’s it going?” She nodded, asking but not really caring what the response was. Amon roughly snapped something about pardoning the intrusion and slipped his shoes off at the door. Mado wasted no time in sitting down and opening her quinke with an expert flick of her wrist. “Ken, why is the rabbit still alive?” Her whip crackled across the carpet, its shiny red surface twisting and snapping under her grip. “Think over your next words very carefully.” She said through clenched teeth. 

Ken swallowed, Hide stepped in front of him protectively. Behind them, Amon blocked the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it has been a while ;-; I found a new place to live and am getting all the paperwork done, I also got a new job recently so that I can buy food. :) Should be moving into the new, far nicer, place mid-november. So hopefully updates will be a little more regular after that. 
> 
> Stay Safe my Crew!   
> And Thanks for reading :)


	21. Onwards

“Akira-san, that’s not why we’re here,” Amon spoke with a stern growl.

“Your partner. My Father.” 

“Not now, please.” The two seemed to have brought an argument inside with them. 

“Coffee anyone?” Hide interjected, balancing a few cups too many in his hands. Akira’s brow furrowed but she didn’t argue further. Amon just signed and reached forward to place a strong hand on Ken’s shoulder. Hide noticed and his smile faded, “Another job?” Hide asked. Amon nodded, a quick flash of sadness crossing his face. He gazed down at hiding’s feet, hiding something, not looking anyone in the eye. 

Ken stayed still, his blinking and breathing the only signs that he wasn’t a wax figure. His mind filled with worry and the same expression he had when reading the climax of a good book. Not that anyone but Hide could recognize this particular expression. Then the spell was broken, Ken’s eyes flicked up, his arm twisted faster than Hide could make out and with a loud snapping noise Akira’s whip went from a blurred shard of red to a solid form. She’d flicked it forward, the look of surprise on her face proving that she hadn’t expected Ken to catch it. 

“Akira!” Amon stepped forward, a few droplets of Ken’s blood seeped out from his palm, dribbled down his elbow and created uneven circles on the floor. The room froze with an uncomfortable atmosphere. Hide had his hand on the scorpion blade strapped under his shirt, unsure of what to do next.

“How can I just stand here?!” Her composure had broken, “I’ve got no one left! Because of Ghouls, because of Him!” 

“Kaneki-san, you’d best just leave. We were supposed to brief you with some past reports of Jason, I’ll send them to your mobile instead.” 

Ken dropped the whip, the slash on his palm zipping closed. Keeping an eye on Akira he picked up a full duffle bag from the pile under the stairs and backed slowly towards the door. Hide followed, presuming the bags were important he lifted one and hefted it onto his shoulder. Kaneki looked him up and down but said nothing, not until they were outside.

Hide let out a slightly nervous laugh, “If they trash our house I hope the CCG gets us a new one.” 

“Go home Hide,” Kaneki said sternly, not turning around. 

“What? No, I’m coming with you.” 

“You’ll get yourself killed.” Ken walked briskly and Hide had to jog to keep up, the bag on his shoulder heavy and straining. Kaneki’s bag seemed light, or at least, he carried it as if the weight was no trouble at all. 

“Not if you’re with me. Let’s go together, Ken I Love you.”

Kaneki froze in his tracks for a moment before darting down a smaller side road, Hide sped after him. As soon as he had turned the corner Ken’s hands had grabbed his arms, forcing him up against the wall with a sharp smack and stinging sensation. Hide’s feet dragged backwards as he was pushed and Kaneki kept his head down. Pinned Hide waited a few moments before opening his mouth, “Ken?”

Kaneki lifted his head, fat tears rolled off his cheeks as he released Hide’s wrists. “I’m sorry, I just can’t lose you. I can’t endure even the thought of it.” He sobbed, the bag slipping off his shoulder with a heavy thud. 

Hide tensed up, “Don’t you know, I feel that way too. When you left, when you vanished, when you were alone at the CCG… When you tired to die.” He stammered on the last phrase but gritted his teeth to get through it. “I thought, for a moment, like my world was ending. Ken I won't, I can’t feel like that again, please don’t put me through it.” Kaneki’s hands slipped down Hide’s arms and held his hands lightly in his own. He sniffed, wiped his face and smiled slightly. 

“Alright.” Kaneki picked up his bag and lifted Hide’s from him, taking it lightly as if it was full of feathers. “Okay.” He moved back onto the road, “Just promise me if I say run, you run.” He walked down the alley, stopped and gazed over one shoulder coldly. “Trust me. I can take a lot more damage than you, so if I decide you need to leave then… Promise.”

“Ken I…” Hide considered the proposal, Kaneki’s expression did not change. “I Promise. I’ll, I’ll try.” 

Taking a step towards him, Hide noticed Ken’s expression shift into a half-smile. “Alright, I suppose I can take that.” Hide grinned, skipping forward to walk by Ken’s side. 

“I’ve been training at the CCG ya’ know. Even got my own Quinke.”

“That little knife at your back?” Ken asked.

“What! How did you know?” 

“You reached for it back in the living room, and it clicked against the wall just now. Besides, they smell like ghoul.” Kaneki shrugged, no longer made nervous by his own heightened senses. Hide reached out and held Ken’s hand, smiling as if they were going on a picnic rather than off to kill ghouls. The CCG phone buzzed in Ken’s pocket and he fished it out to go over the data. 

“Hey, I’m not leaving you.” Hide gave Kens had a squeeze after seeing the expression of worry that flashed over his face. 

“I know. Let’s find a Café or something, we should read through this.” Kaneki nodded, skimming over the pages of notes on his phone. His eyes flicked over the screen with worry as his brow furrowed. He bit his lip ever so slightly, Hide knew that face, regret. 

“Hey, We’re going to get through this.” Hide smiled, “and are you sure you want to go to a café, from what I can tell you sort of have bad luck with cafés.”

Kaneki nodded, the information shifting and sorting itself inside his mind. “This is everything the CCG knows but I bet the ghouls know more. Let’s go to Antique.” 

“Antique… wait, isn’t that where you met Rize?” Hide felt the shiver at the mention of her name and decided not to mention it again. “I trust you, Ken. Let’s go.” Kaneki looked onward, towards the streets of Tokyo. 

\--

“Its been a while since we’ve been here.” Hide gazed up at Antique, the warm light from inside giving his face a golden hue.

“Actually I’ve been here a few times, its run by ghouls. Good people.” Kaneki checked the street was clear before hurrying forwards and into the building. The warmth met them as soon as they entered and the smell of freshly ground coffee seemed to hold back the cold wind. Touka was cleaning a table, she turned to greet them but, after spotting Ken, scowled and sniffed. She couldn’t start a fight with human customers in the shop, so she lead them over to the back door and up into the apartments above the shop. 

Inside the corridor, her eyes flashed black and red. “He’s a human. You told him.” She shifted into an offensive position, ready for a fight. 

“Its fine, he’s with me.” Ken stepped protectively in front of Hide, ready to fight in order to keep him safe.

“Shit. It's not fine. We’re in enough danger without you exposing us to your buddies at the CCG.” She had to keep her voice lowered or customer’s downstairs might hear. But it was clear that all she wanted to do was scream and end them both on the spot. “Get out of here. Now. I’ll deal with you later.” 

Hide shuffled back a step but Kaneki held his ground. Somewhere behind Touka, a door opened slowly and a light mousy brown head of hair peeked out. “Mr Dove!” Hinami smiled and skipped forward, rushing past Touka and wrapping her arms around Ken's waist. “I was worried about you! But then I smelt you and now you’re here!” 

“Hinami,” Touka growled. 

“Sis, he saved me. And he saved you too!”

Touka flushed with anger and gritted her teeth, “Whatever.” Her eyes faded back to there normal steely purple and she beckoned the strange group into the living room. “I’ll let the manager know you’re here.”

Hinami smiled and introduced herself to Hide, who shook her hand, happy to know Kaneki wasn’t totally alone in the world of ghouls. “You’re a human?” Hinami asked, noticing his smell.

“Yeah, is that okay?” Hide responded a little nervously. 

“Uh-huh. You have big bro's sent all over you so I don’t think you’ll hurt us.” She headed over to a large bird cage and began to show them the feathery cockatiel inside. Completely oblivious to the blush that had spread over Hide’s face. Kaneki too was attempting to hide the red on his cheeks. 

Touka kicked open the door roughly, holding a tray of coffee cups. “What are you too so embarrassed about?” she snarled, setting the tray down hard enough to make the coffee slosh up and over the edge of the cups. She crossed her legs and slumped into the sofa opposite them, her eyes darting from the cockatiel in its cage to the boys sitting opposite her. “Hina, leave him in the cage, no don’t open…” Too late, the bird squawked flapped its wings and flew in large circles around the room before landing on Touka’s head. “Asshole!” she swore, waving it away.

“Caw- Asshole! Asshole!” The bird mimicked and Hide had to cover his mouth to stop himself from laughing. 

“Touka you shouldn’t teach him bad words!” Hinami held up a treat and the bird swooped down to rest on her hand. She shrugged and sunk slightly into her seat. 

“You killed the Gourmet, didn’t you,” Touka asked, her sharp eyes steady on Kaneki who responded with a small nod. “Never liked that creep anyway.” She said, but her expression didn’t match the words she used. “Used to spar with him, before Antique.” Realising her thoughts were dragging her mind away from the situation on hand she shook her head and leaned forward. “Anyway. Why are you here.” 

“Jason. Do you know anything about him?” Kaneki interlocked his fingers and placed his elbows on his knees. Hide decided he’d be more useful with Hinami, petting her bird’s soft feathers as it nipped his fingers playfully. 

Touka looked over at Hinami before speaking. “Jason huh, not much, your CCG buddies probably know more than I do.” She raised a hand to her mouth, “Although, I think I know someone who is in contact with him.” Kaneki waited patiently for her to continue. “Just, you have to promise not to kill him. No matter what.” 

Ken nodded, without thinking. He agreed without asking why. At this point, it didn’t matter. He’d only been asked to find Jason and report his location back. Although he was certain they’d order him to fight, what good what a ghoul working for the CCG if he didn’t fight. 

“Ayato Kirishima.” Touka mumbled, “don’t kill him, but you can beat the hell out of him from me. Start with the 11th ward.” 

Ken stood up and nodded, “Thank you, Is the manager in?” 

“No, I’ll let him know you stopped by. Need a snack before you leave?” Touka chuckled glancing at Hide.

“No Thank you,” Kaneki responded, pretending to ignore the joke. Hide clipped the cage shut and thanked Hinami for letting him play with Hetare the bird. 

“You can come again if you like!” Hinami smiled. 

“Hina.” Touka huffed.

“What? I like big bro and his friend!” She pouted, “Grumpy sis.” 

“Hide, let's go.” Kaneki couldn’t help but smile, he’d been alone for too long. Now he had made quite a few aquatints in all kinds of strange places. Ghouls in coffee shops, rescued humans and members of the CCG. Whether he realized or not, he’d also made a few friends.

They finished up the coffee and headed out, waving goodbye to the other members of Antique through the coffee shops glass window. “Where to now ‘Big-bro’.” Hide grinned.

Kaneki glared at him, pulling on a coat from one of the large duffle bags. The outside air had changed direction and brought a nipping cold along with it. Hide’s nose had turned red and he rubbed his hands together to warm them. “Here.” Ken rummaged inside the bag and handed Hide a pair of thick black gloves. 

“Thanks, what else do you have packed away in there?” He leaned in, trying to peek inside. Ken zipped it up and lifted the bags back over one shoulder.

“Just CCG pre-packed bags, for emergency’s and stuff.” Ken walked onwards

“And stuff… You have no idea do you?”

“I was in a hurry.” Kaneki blushed. Hide just laughed and he’d Ken's hand in his own. 

“Alright then, to the 11th ward?” He asked.

“To the 11th ward.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still alive!  
> Just working hard to put down a deposit on my own place. Till then my pets and I are borrowing the spare room at my BBF's place. :)


	22. Feint

The air at CCG headquarters had become as taunt as a hanged man's rope. The lights were never switched off and the offices acted like a beehive. Never closing down, not for a second. A few of the younger members, to ease their nerves, acted as if each report was another chapter of a soap opera. What would the protagonists do next? When would they enter the antagonist's lair? Other staff members recognized the events as a chance to change everything. The way humans and ghouls interacted, the fact ghouls could be made artificially and the way a human and a ghoul had been working on the same case, together. Even Amon saw the bitter irony behind what was happening. To defeat the ghouls who choose to devastate mankind, they had enlisted their very own artificial ghoul. His thoughts varied between a desire for revenge and the hope of a peaceful future. And although he’d never admit it, he was rooting for Kaneki and Hideyoshi.

Even ghouls felt a change coming, especially those at Antique. They kept up to track with the news, hoping to see any sign of Kaneki and Hide’s latest ventures. Even the general public could sense some kind of tension, yet they were unsure of why.

 

\--

 

Is that them? Hide asked, using sign language from a pocketbook he’d found in one of Ken’s canvas bags. Kaneki nodded back, holding the binoculars up to his tired eyes. You should sleep, Hide gestured. Lately, Kaneki had been staying up all night, rather than waking up Hide for his turn to keep watch. 

Through the glass lenses, Ken could see a few ghouls in red cloaks pace back and forth around the parameter of Aogiri’s territory. He placed them carefully down onto the grass and checked again that they were downwind. Didn’t want any ghouls to catch a hold of their scent after all. The CCG had been pretty vague about what they wanted as of late, probably still arguing over whether or not Kaneki could even be trusted. The news was also still discussing the ghoul who rescued humans, who they could be and what possible motives they could have. 

“Neki’” Hide whispered, missing the sound of Ken’s voice. “You need sleep. Your hands are shaking.” Ken just pulled his sleeves over his slim fingers. It has been easy enough the track the black rabbits tail through the wards, especially when Kaneki could zip up his mask and fit in with other ghouls. He’d even managed to nab an Aogiri cloak for later. Despite the CCG pushing Ken to begin infiltrating the building so they could map out an attack, he’d kept his distance. “Ken, another message…” Hide held the mobile phone to him its light illuminating the trees for just a second too long. 

“Down.” Kaneki barked, leaping over and pushing Hide down. Before he’d had time to register what was going on a red-cloaked ghoul was standing above their hiding spot. A skull-like mask hiding any emotion that they might have been showing. 

Off behind them, another ghoul called out, “What is it?” 

“I thought I saw something…” The ghoul stepped closer still. The hollow eyes on his mask gazing back and forth over the trees and bushes that hid Kaneki and Hide. Ken’s Kagune slipped out like snakes hiding through the long grass, he covered Hide’s mouth and they shared a quick look. 

Hide’s expression said it all, don’t go. Ken, don’t go. Too late, the ghoul looked down.

Either Ken didn’t notice or he wasn’t paying attention. Or perhaps he just didn’t want to hesitate. His Kagune cut the air with a sharp swish, smacking the ghoul in the temple and catching their mask as it fell. Another tentacle swooped down, preventing the now unconscious ghoul from making so much as a thud. In their place, Kaneki stood up, “Nothing.” He called out, trying to force his voice into an octave lower than natural. “Some animal turned tail and hid.”

Ken swiftly pulled the Aogiri cloak over his shoulders and slid down the bank. Small stones jittering down beside him. Hide stayed down whilst his heart thumped through his ears, he scampered back. How did this happen? Kaneki, who had always seemed so small and precious was now something more. He’d come out from the folds of his books, evolved and changed. The body of a dead ghoul, neck twisted around like a pipe cleaner in some school kids craft project, was proof enough of that. Hide was scared, the Kaneki he knew, the Kaneki he loved, was that man still in there somewhere, hidden under the in fresh burses that fell like yellow petals on his skin. 

Hide knew that if he walked out there Kaneki would have to kill another ghoul, just like this one. But on his own Ken could blend in, after all, he was a ghoul. 

“Let's get back.” The ghoul’s masked face made his voice reverberate, stripping it of any character. Once Kaneki was in a crowd of those anonymous ghouls it would be hard to distinguish him from the others. Hide considered it, he wanted nothing more than to leap forward. Go into battle back to back with Kaneki until the end of the world. Only, the end of the world would come to a lot sooner for them if Hide did something so reckless. 

So he hid, staying low with CCG calling on speed dial. “Kilo-November-Zero-Two-Hotel-Delta” The line clicked as he was put through without a word. 

“Hide?” Amon’s voice can though. He, Mado and a few others spent time on call in case they needed back up. “Keep an eye on Kaneki, he’s gone in. And I’m gonna need someone to move this ghoul body before someone smells it.” 

“On our way. Thanks for the warning.” Hide could hear his assertive nod as well as the sarcasm in his words.

“He saw an opportunity and he took it okay. Just keep an eye on his position. Please.” 

Amon hadn’t really warmed up to Kaneki, but Hide could get along with anyone. Besides, even Amon could relate to the desperate plea Hide was trying to push away. “Stay calm Hideyoshi. We’ve got your back here.”

“Thanks, I’ll stay here and…” Ka-chunk. Hide’s phone was flung from his hand and into the dirt below. “Oh no.”

“That hurt.” The ghoul had stood up, rubbing his neck as it cracked back into place. “Not as much as this though.” He whisked out a single Kagune tentacle and scored the earth with long lines that ripped through mud and stone alike. Hide gripped the hilt of Scorpion and prepared himself to fight. “A knife?” The ghoul shrugged, “What’s next a fork and spoon?” 

Hide had no witty retort, he just focused on his balance and tried to stop his hands from sweating. The tentacle snapped forward, clashing against scorpion’s blade as Hide blocked and sending a shock like electricity down his arms. Two blows later and he was already feeling a burn-in is arms and sweat warming his back. No counter attack opportunities ever arose, this ghoul kept his attacks going to fast there was no time to fight back. It was all Hide could do to block every strike, after all, he wasn’t fast enough to dodge them. 

“Aww, little mouse. Worried about your friend? Don’t worry, my brother will take good care of him.” Stained teeth grinned from under the ghoul’s hood, his red and black eyes shine with glee. 

“Ken.” Hide gasped, another strike slashing down his arm and stinging as warm flesh was exposed to the cold night air. Still, he kept Scorpion high, shaking and uneasy, yet still high. He adjusted his grip, letting the sharp edge face forward. His mind going over and over, what would Ken do, books, Binkaku 

“You think you can touch me with that toothpick. All you humans are a laugh.” His Kagune darted forward, aiming to spear Hide through the middle. “You know where that smaller Quinque come from right?” The ghoul snarled, darting in for another attack. 

\--

Inside, cold tiles were covered in a mist of condensation. Scattered splashes of blood marked its surface in patterns like ink from an artist’s brush. Seeping into fresh cracks and disfiguring its chequered black and white pattern. Kaneki coughed, liquid thick in his lungs. As soon as they were through the doorway he'd been ambushed, spikes ripped through his arms and back. He was pushed down, pinned. His stolen mask taken back and his arms tightly bound behind him. "Fuck. How long have they been out there?"

"Not sure, but my brothers dealing with the other one as we speak." 

"Human?"

"Yeah, not this one though. Smells odd." Someone pulled up Ken's hair, crouching in front of him and wiping some blood from his cheek. "Well, shit looks like we found the bastard red eye everyone's going on about. Pathetic. This is who all the rumours are about?"

"He did kill the Gourmet." 

"My sister could have killed the Gourmet, nothin' to get all proud off." The younger one snarled, heavy boots kicking Ken's side with rib splintering force. "Let Yamori know. I'll get the others ready Fucking doves are probably on the way here already." 

Kaneki attempted to stand, but a snapped rib twisted inside him and caused a spasm of pain to ripple out from his chest. He curled over, Hide. I have to get back to Hide, that ghoul... He felt his legs drag across the cold floor. Footsteps came closer, the chinking sound of metal tapping metal rhythmically moving into the room. "A new toy?" This stranger asked, his voice deep and uncaring. A voice that causes goosebumps to rise and the tiny hairs on the back of your neck tingle. "I like new toys." 

 

\--

Outside Hide ducked, feeling the air spilt above his forehead and hearing the rip of tree bark and twigs snap behind him. He dashed forward, putting all his panic aside as impulse took over. Ken. I won't lose you. Scorpian bit into flesh and Hide threw his full weight onto the ghoul, using his foot to trip up his attacker just as Akira-san had shown him. He slammed his shoulder forward and forced his forearm under the ghoul's chin, knocking the wind from him just as Amon had shown him. Lastly, he drew his knee up sharply, hitting the ghoul hard between the legs, a little trick Takizawa had shared with him over lunch. Hide's knife slid between the ghoul's rib bones and stuck, up to its hilt, in their chest. 

"Wha..." The ghoul blinked in surprise, but his expression quickly turned into one of anger and rage. He ripped his Kagune from the tree trunk and aimed it straight down, there was no way just some CCG armour would defend a direct blow like the one coming down now. Hide closed his eyes, held his breath and pushed down on the knives end with all his remaining strength. 

Something cracked through the air, a purple streak that zipped forward and twisted in the air. "Hideyoshi!" 

Hide snapped back into focus and rolled as fast ass he could away from the ghoul beneath him. Just as he did so, someone in black lept over him, driving a giant Quinque down. Unable to defend himself due to his Kagune being wrapped up in Akira's whip, Amon had no problem relieving the ghoul of his head and finish him off for good.

"Congratulations Hideyoshi, you survived 30 seconds against an S ranked ghoul. One of the Bin brothers by the looks of it." Akira hadn't even broken into a sweat.

"We got here just in time," Amon added. 

"Great. Thanks, feel free to rate my performance on a point-based grading system later but right now can we please just go in after Kaneki?" Hide struggled to pull Scorpian from its place in the ghoul's chest, but with a hefty tug he finally got it free and started to move forward towards Aoigiri's base. 

"Kaneki will just have to wait until the others arrive. If we go in now we'll be killed and they will escape." Akira flicked her whip back to her side, blood still dribbling from its tightly woven Quinque steel.

"But!" Hide began to argue, but the shuddering of his muscles disagreed. "But... Kaneki..." His vision blurred, Amon reached out to steady him with a strong arm. 

"Hideyoshi, you're bleeding. Hideyoshi... can you hear me? Mado!" Amon barked further orders but Hide couldn't hear them, he only saw their mouths moving and there faces shifting into expressions of worry. Right before he passed out, he thought he heard a scream of pain, but it might have just been his oxygen-starved brain going delirious as his body struggled to manage itself after such hefty blood loss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello My Crew, 
> 
> Sorry its taken so long, finally moved into my own place. (I've stayed in 5 different placed since I started this fic!)  
> Should only be one more chapter but if you want me to write more I can.  
> Just leave a comment of what you want to see next, Re:? Ships? OC? or even a different fandom?
> 
> Thank you for being so patient and sticking with me for so long,  
> I never thought I'd keep writing after the first chapter but it was the comments that kept me going :) 
> 
> Also, anyone understands Hide's CCG code? Kudo's if you do! <3


	23. Polychrome

  


“Hideyoshi?” Amon sighed, leaning out the window and trying not to think about all the people he’d left behind. Their faces coming back to haunt him whenever he found himself empathising with other people’s loss. “The other Bin brother, well he took Kaneki into the Aougri maze. We tracked his phone and managed to get a very comprehensive layout of the building. However, it wasn’t long before we heard the screaming.” He paused again as if hearing the echo ring over in his ears. For a moment, it was as if Hide could hear it too. Thick tears rolled from his face and no amount of sniffing or rubbing could dissuade the damp forming tracks. He rolled over on the grass, green stains rubbing on to his shoulders and elbows. Amon sat on the window sill whilst Akira lent against the wall outside, Amon was about to continue but Hide stopped him. 

“So, you heard screams. So what, I don’t believe he’s dead.” He sat up quickly enough to make his head spin. “Ow. It's not proof its… circumference…” 

“Circumstantial?” Akira asked.

“That’s the one.” Hide placed a hand over his head, wincing.

"Hideyoshi, you didn't hear it..." Amon was trying to be kind, "you stood up against an S ranked ghoul. You're lucky to be alive, especially after the damage you took. Kaneki, he's gone."

But Hide wasn't listening, "it was only a scream." He muttered, hand on his chin and thinking hard 

"We can play it back if you like." Mado reached out and pulled Hideyoshi to his feet, he sat on the windowsill with his feet brushing the bushes. 

"No no, that's not a good idea. You don't want to listen to that recording, even some of our toughest officers had to leave the room." Amon glared at her, but she just shrugged back.

Hide turned to look at him, not asking, just reading the expression on Amon's face. Serious as always, but masking the sadness of a man unable to act. "I understand," said hide, brushing grass from his knees. "But you, the CCG. None of them can stop me." He grinned.

"I don't doubt that. But, that head injury might." Akira spoke in a monotone as she placed a firm hand on Hides arm to prevent him from slipping sideways. 

"Shirt I'm totally brine." Hide mumbled, everything spinning as if seen through a kaleidoscope. He squinted at a passing squirrel and attempted to give it a salute, knocking himself in the face with his own cast. "Lead the way officer." 

"Hideyoshi, get back inside. You need rest, we will contact you if we manage to receive Kaneki-kun's body." Akira tried to hide her soft side, but Hide was bringing up too many memories from when her Cat had an operation and spent a long afternoon bumping into things and mewing at everything that moved. She patted him on the head. "Back through the window. There there." 

After Hide was back in bed they left, Amon turning for a moment to look through the door. "If it's any consolation, Arima-san doesn't seem entirely convinced either." 

"Obviously." Hide yawned loudly, "Ken's just off somewhere reading a book. That's all." And with that, he fell back to sleep. His eyelashes fluttering over the waves of bad dreams that plagued him. Dreams of Kaneki in red, masked and unstoppable. Nightmares where Ken turned around and never came back. Ones where Ken fell into one of his own books and became an illustration, never to move again.

"Yoooo!" The next morning Juuzo woke Hide up by slamming a basket of fruit onto his lap. "I heard you want to go after the one eye.” Juuzo winked.

“His name is Kaneki.” Hide shuffled up and placed the apples that had fallen out back into the basket. Which was hard when Juuzo was rummaging around and kept pushing them back out. “Juuzo what are you…” Hide would have finished asking, but the answer became apparent when Juuzo pulled a slim black box out from the bottom of the basket. One of the apples tumbled to the floor and rolled into a corner. “That’s …. Scorpion?”

“Duh. I’ve already got mine under my shirt. There’s two in there for ya’. Ground floor makes this easier. I’ve already taken care of the cameras’.” Juuzo smiled, pushing one large cardboard cut out of a ghoul drawn in shaky crayon up against the wall. “Well. Get ready, I want to show you how to throw the knife before we head off.”

“Do you just carry that thing around with you?” Hide asked, slipping out from under the covers and sitting cross-legged on the bed.

“Na. I just needed an excuse to come here.” Juuzo nonchalantly flipped a knife out from under his shirt and threw it over his shoulder, it zipped across the room and sunk to the hilt into the cardboard ghoul’s nose. “His name is Kado.” 

“Imaginative.” Hide stated, unwrapping his scorpion’s and weighing them one in each hand. 

“Hold the blade, yup, like that. Then just throw.” Hide threw scorpion, it hit the cardboard Kado in the chest, but bounced off and clattered onto the floor. "Wrong angle, don't spin it, flip it, See."

"Okay, now you're just showing off." Hide rose his eyebrows as at least eight knives were expertly juggled and thunked one by one into the ghouls face, creating a smiling face with there hilts. 

Juuzo just laughed and retrieved the knives, slipping them away under his shirt into a hundred hidden pockets. He flipped one back and it stabbed into Hide's mattress an inch from his crossed legs and a few more inches from a very sensitive place indeed. Hide carefully pulled it out and then pushed some of the stuffing back into his blanket. Juuzo hopped around the room inspecting things, letting out various ummms and arhhhs as he did so. "Shinohara says I can't go after Aogiri till we have a squad in place." 

"If I asked ghouls to help us, could we go then?" 

"Huh?" Juuzo picked his nails with Scorpion’s edge. 

"Hahaha. Not that that's possible, I don't know any ghouls mmmm just thinking out loud..." Hide laughed, Ken had convinced him that one day ghouls and humans could work together, but perhaps today wasn't that day, not quite just yet. 

"Wanna be part of my squad? Because I'm super boreeeedddd." Juuzo flung himself over the bed dramatically "Hide-kuuuunnnnnnn." Before Hide could respond Juuzo and flicked a knife over to the door, it juddered in the wood, locking the door to the fame and making it unable to open from the outside without a huge push. "Woops. I missed. Let's go out the window." Juuzo laughed, clearly feeling no sympathy for damaging hospital property.

"Juuzo..." Hide gulped. But the only response he got was a flash of the many, many knives stuffed under the young investigator's shirt. Hide hid behind a nervous smile, "Okay, let's go." 

“Great! Also, don’t spin it, just let it go and lean in a little.” 

“What? Oh, the knife, I don’t know, I just wish it would come back after.”

Juuzo blinked, “Just twist the hilt.” Hide did so and found a coil of strong Quinke wire inside, “It changes the balance, but you can use them like that if you want.” Hide tried throwing the knife again, this time keeping the hilt open and held between his fingers. The knife stuck into Kado’s neck, but then slipped out. Only this time before it hit the floor Hide whipped it back, using skills he’d picked up from Akira, he caught it and let out a small surprised laugh. 

“You’re quite a catch.” Juuzo whistled. 

“Haha, don’t use that expression please…” Hide muttered 

“What? It means your good at catching right? I'm right, Takizawa told me. Or was he lying?” Juuzo pushed open the window and hopped onto the sill. 

“Um, no, no it doesn’t. I'll explain it later.” Hide plumped up pillows to make a fake Hide and turned off the light. Getting strange flashbacks of when he'd sneak out to see Kaneki during High School. Pushing the window shut after he’d hopped out, his bare feet felt instantly cold on the wet grass. The late afternoon had sapped at the day's warmth and left a chill in its place. “Let's go, I can stop at Ken’s and get some clothes on the way.” 

“Naa,” Juuzo said, lifting a bag he’d dug up from under the window and throwing it at Hide’s face. Dirt clouded upwards from Hide’s hands as he pulled open the bag. Inside was one set of CCG armour, shoes and socks. “Come on, come on, come on, I want to go pick out a new Quinke.” Juuzo grinned, pointing and gesturing for Hide to follow. He was acting like a child about to be taken to the toy store.

“Okay… I’m on my way.” Pulling the suit over his pyjamas and strapping on various parts of armour Hide hopped forward, pulling on one boot at a time. He seemed strangely calm for someone about to break into a ghoul’s nest with a small hungry-for-a-fight kid, then again, on the inside all Hide could do was wish for Ken's safety. So much so that the danger of what he was doing refused to sink in. 

Travelling to Aogiri’s base seemed to take an age and yet, no time at all. Being both nervous and determined seemed to distort time. Or at least, that’s what it felt like. CCG trucks had already set up around the building, keeping a watchful eye out so that the assault teams would have the best chance possible of getting in and out alive at a moments notice. “That one, in there is your one-eyed friend.” Juuzo pointed to a domed building to onside of the main structure. 

“How can you be sure?” Hide whispered back as they passed through the defences of an unsuspecting CCG recon group. 

“All the screams had an echooooo,” Juuzo said in a rather sing-song manner before sticking his tongue out and darting ahead. “bye-bye!”

“Thanks... for clearing the path?” Hide murmured, unsure if Juuzo was doing this on purpose or if the strange investigator was just itching for a fight that badly. Either way, Hide was now alone, not far from the spot where he’d been attacked. How long had he spent in the hospital anyway, his hair had grown longer and ruffled, so he suspected it was longer than anyone cared to admit. “Right. Pull yourself together Nagachika. Ken needs you.”

\--

Hide followed the parameter around the buildings towards the dome. Keeping his eyes peeled for any sign of movement, openings or unattended doors. He could hear a commotion being stirred up by Juuzo on the other side of Aogiri’s campus, most of the ghouls he saw headed towards the noise, Kagune unsheathed and ready. The CCG surveillance teams had also noticed the disturbance and were investigating the event. One ghoul in particular caught Hide’s attention. They’d left the dome with a bucket, come out from a small side door hidden around some bushes. Their skull mask perked up at the sound of Juuzo laughing, placing the bucket in the nearby shrubs, they dashed off towards the fighting. 

When Hide crept forward, Scorpion in one hand, he smelt the content of that container before seeing it. Rotten meat. Maggots twisting through bits of flesh and bone, the bucket was rusty and full to the brim with rinds of half-dried skin. Pink and red slices of something also seemed to be mixed in with the rest of the chucks. It took Hide a while to realise they were nails. Toes and fingers filled the bucket, the smell making sour vomit rise up and stick in Hide’s nostrils. He gagged and pulled up his uniform over his nose. 

Don’t throw up, don’t throw up, don’t throw up. Hide’s eye watered unable to drag his gaze away from the digits. Something about them. Something made his skin rise in goosebumps, a memory of Kaneki caressing his back in the darkness of their new bedroom. Hide shook his head, pulling off his helmet and letting the sweat dribble off his cheekbones. 

One shaky step forward, then another and one more. Hide walked past the bucket and towards the door. He pushed it open slowly, knife drawn and knees bent in case he needed to dodge back. Inside the chequered chessboard floor was a mess with red splattered everywhere, ruining the perfect pattern. A single chair stood in the centre of the room. Its back towards Hide, all he could see was bound wrists and bruised hands strapped with chain. Black nails twitched as Hide’s footsteps announced his entrance into the room. 

A prisoner, no, no please not him. Let it be anyone but him. Hide realized with a sickening stomach twist why the fingers had seemed so familiar. I don’t care who, just let it be anyone but Ken. 

The prayer echoed in Hide’s mind just as his footsteps did in the domed room. Speeding up as he began to run towards the chair. A light head of white hair lent down low, stained with dirt and blood. 

“…Ken?” Hide asked, hoping he was wrong.

The snowy, pale face lifted. Hollow and blank. “Oh. Hide…” Ken gave a half smile. “Please leave.” He didn’t sound angry, or worried. Just empty and perhaps a bit lonely. 

“No! I, I came to get you. Let’s go home. Please.” 

Kaneki didn’t respond. 

“Let's escape. I’ll read all the books you want me too. I promise. Just get up.” Hide started to scratch Scorpions blade against the chain’s that tightly pulled at Ken’s red ankles. 

“Just stop.” Ken winced and something slithered and scuttled down his neck, falling onto his lap and twisting before clicking its sharp legs and scurrying away across the black and white floor. “No ones coming. Not even Arima.” 

“Well. I’m here.” Hide tried to bend one of the links of chain by twisting Scorpion, but to no avail. “I’m here. Danm it. Ken, I know a ghoul could break this easily. Come on!” He moved to the front of the chair and lent down, kneeling with his hands on Ken's stooped shoulders. “For me. Please.”

“I’m not, I can’t. He’ll be back soon. There’s no point. Just go away. Let him kill me. He’s almost there.” 

“NO, I WON'T.” Hide grabbed Ken’s face in his hands, Scorpion clattering onto the floor. He pulled in his own bottom lip and bit down hard enough until one canine split the dry skin and began to well up with blood. “I can’t, I won't ever give up on you. And I’ll never let you give up on yourself.” Leaning forward, Hide let his lips brush Ken’s. "I'll die before I let you give up, idiot, don't you know that already."

Something hard smacked into Hide’s back and it took him a few moments to realise it was the floor. Kaneki was on top of him, gripping his wrists, the chain taught and pressing down on Hide’s throat. “Ken…. Kane…” Hide could barely speak between the rough kisses. Kaneki’s eye had turned red at the taste of warm blood. "Ken... I've always ...loved you."

The kisses felt warm, rough and then spiked into pain as Kaneki’s teeth began to tear open the wound. Hide felt his eye’s well up with tears but refused to let out even so much as a whimper until Kaneki had finished. After only a second or two Ken had snapped his chains and was pushing Hide hard onto the marble. Leaning over him and continuing to bite, snap and gnaw. Hide made his quivering arms move, his hands slipping over Ken’s back to pull him closer. He’d already passed out, but instinct kept him holding on tight. Kaneki, finally, swallowed. 

The whimper Ken let out became a cry, then a moan which turned into a wail as Kaneki sat back. His face bloody and his eye red. The double doors in front of him flew open and a giant in a hockey mask strode in, slapping a weapon on his palm. He opened his mouth, but Ken’s thorny Kagune slashed through his chest before he’d got the chance to speak. The Gourmet’s Kagune had finally settled, it no longer looked like an odd, miss-coloured addition, but now curled over Ken's shoulder and formed one clawed hand. Karen’s thorns spreading over Rize’s tentacles to form a brand new Kagune. Kaneki’s Kagune, fueled and ready. 

“How Dare You!” Yamamori screamed, spit spraying from his teeth. His own Kagune wrapping around him to form a thick defence. “I’ll take your legs next. Your Arms. Your TEETH.” 

Kaneki stayed on the offensive, wheedling the Kagune as if he’d had years of practice. “You think that would hurt me? I don’t care. He’s already gone. And I did it all myself.” 

Yamamori just bellowed as thorns ripped through his skin. Ken took chunks from his exposed arms and ripped pieces away with each strike. 

“You taste like shit. You, You’re nothing. Nothing at all.” Crunch. Snap. Yamomori was on the ground now. “Tell me.” Kaneki whispered, “What’s 1000… minus 7?” 

When Juuzo entered the dome, thin streaks of moonlight were seeping down from fresh cracks in the curved ceiling. Munching and crunching echoed around the room. What was left of Yamamori twitched to one side, Hide was flat on his back opposite him, He lay still, his face bloody and arms outstretched. In the centre, Kaneki stood looking up at the sky. His hair had lost all colour, de-saturated and pure white it drifted slowly in the drafts whispering around the room.

Meanwhile, at the CCG headquarters, it didn’t take long for Shinohara to become suspicious of just how long Juuzo had spent away. He wasn’t in the training room or the bathroom, there was little point checking the meeting rooms but just in case Shinohara looked anyway. “Have you seen Juuzo today?” He asked Takizawa who was browsing the CCG’s record library. 

“I haven’t, thankfully.” He joked, flicking over a few old files. “Akira is reading everyone’s reports from yesterdays training exercises and I think maybe grading them all. She might have seen him.” 

“Thanks.” Shinohara nodded, heading down a few isles to find Akira.

“Grading them would be a waste of time, but if he asked, Takizawa gets an A-.” Akira snapped, sliding a file back onto the shelf. “Juuzo went to see Hideyoshi.” 

“Oh, Thank goodness.”

“He took every Scorpion Qunike we have with him.”

“Oh Shit.”

\--

Every Scorpion Quinke the CCG owned turned out to be, to put it simply, a lot. Only, right now the majority of those blades were embedded into Aougiri ghouls. Juuzo observed the three figures for a moment before drawing the last two of his Quinke blades. Hide’s head flopped uncontrollably to one side, he tried to speak, but each word just bubbled out from between his exposed teeth. Outside, CCG squadrons were closing in, finishing off the ghouls who had managed to escape Juuzo’s bloody path. Amon’s squad reached the dome first, Akira at his side. Seeing the carnage, Akira felt guilty for not saying anything sooner, ghouls she had no love for. But Hide, had Juuzo really brought him here while she'd sat back and said nothing? Her bitterness might have got someone killed.

Yamomori was almost finished, all it took were a few more strikes from Juuzo’s blades to cease his twitching all together. 

“Where’s Kaneki?” Amon asked as Juuzo shook blood from his hands.

“He left.” Juuzo hopped off Yamomori’s back and effortlessly dragged along him by the ankle. 

“Akira, take over my squad. Kaneki can’t have gone far. Takizawa no arguing. Juuzo, have you seen Hide?”

Juuzo looked despondent for a moment, regret flicked across his face for a second and his grip on Yamomori’s ankle tightened. “Kaneki took him away.” Was all he would say. 

Amon raised his Quinke and jogged over to a large hole torn through the wall. They can’t have gotten far, he thought, keeping his eyes peeled for signs of broken branches or spots of blood. He heard it then, a wail calling out from the trees close by. Like some dying animal letting out one last howl to a family, it could never reach. Kaneki’s scream ended when Amon came into view, the half-ghoul seemed lost. His face blank and without colour. He looked like a doll, posed and painted in darkening red. Hide was in his arms, his face a mess and eyes closed. Broken teeth seemed to be held in his mouth by only the slightest remains of stringy gum. He didn’t seem to be breathing. Slowly, Kaneki raised his head.

“Amon.” 

“Eyepatch.”

“I’m going to eat you.” Kaneki tried to smile, he gripped Hide tightly and began to shiver through fresh tears. 

“No, no you won't. Ken.” Amon gripped his Quinke, holding it a rather lax defensive position. 

“I will… I’ll eat you all. I’ll tear you apart. Please.” Kaneki was bearly able to speak now. He refused to let go of Hide, holding him tightly close to his chest. “I’m a ghoul.”

Amon understood, however much he didn’t want to, he understood. “I’ll tell his family the truth, but no one else will ever find out. You know that, don’t you?” 

Kaneki smiled. “I loved him.” He smiled even as Amon poised his weapon, he smiled even after the Quinke slashed through his left eye. His body slumped forward as if cradling Hide. Amon could no longer see his face, but he couldn't help imagine that he was still smiling under that fresh scar. Gritting his teeth, he closed his eyes, his shoulders hunched and shivering. It was the first time he’s used his Quinke without being sure if the wound he’d inflicted was fatal or not. Then again, he also wasn’t sure if he wanted it to be. After all, there was something about Kaneki and Hide he couldn’t quite put his finger on.

Many ghouls were taken down that day, yet many more escaped. Aogiri's leaders were nowhere to be found. Overall, the mission was seen as a success, Aogiri's strongest ghouls were scattered evening the odds between them and the doves once again. 

 

 

Many months later, new investigators were introduced to the CCG. A particular few from that group Amon aimed to personally take under his wing, after all, there was something strangely familiar about one of them. The young man was oddly skilled at using a stringed Scopian, and his smile brought back eerie memories on another young boy from a case that was now famous throughout the CCG.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I started this fic I was in a bit of a mess, I didn’t have my own place to live and ended up sleeping over at friends houses and at one point in my parent’s attic. Someone at my student accommodation was threatening me so much I hardly ever left my room there, and when I did I never wanted to go back. Because of this, I didn’t go to my classes and only showered in the middle of the night using the gent’s bathroom at my accommodation. Basically, I was having a really bad time. 
> 
> I started this story as a distraction, not thinking I’d ever actually write an ending. I know it's not as popular or as good as some other stories out there, but I enjoyed writing it, I had fun. 
> 
> So, I just wanted to say thanks. To everyone, member or guest here, who has read, commented or left Kudos on my Fanfic. You really kept me going, getting the emails and seeing that another person had read my work always cheered me up. So much so that I want to write more, I have a Hero Academia fic planned and got back into drawing my Scrapcomic, making Animatic’s for YouTube, plus brushing off my own book and giving it another shot. I thought I’d given up on writing and drawing, all because of one person who made me feel like I was nothing. But not anymore, I don’t want to give up. 
> 
> So, although it might sound silly, writing and reading fanfiction here really has given me the courage I needed to step up and keep moving forward. I hope to see you all again soon, somewhere between the pages of another story. 
> 
> Thank you and Merry Christmas.  
> (Plus, Happy Birthday Haise!)

**Author's Note:**

> Some fanfic that’s been on my mind and is sad.  
> Set after episode 2, AU. Idk I’ve never written fan-fiction before.  
> If anyone wants to commission a plushie, drawing or story just drop me a comment. (And Yes, I will draw yaoi manga for you, or any personalised doushinji. ;) )


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